Straight from the Heart
by PerkyTxGirl
Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that? Season 2 from Jeff and Nick's POV. A little Klaine on the side.
1. Chapter 1

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Language: English, **_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/ Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3500**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Season 2 from the Warblers perspective; Canon Klaine,**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations, For mature audiences only.**_

**Chapter 1 **

**September 2010 Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio**

It's the first day back from the summer break and maybe I'm the only student who's happy and excited to start school. I know it's strange but Dalton is my home and as much fun as the summer was, I'm glad to be home. Of course, so glad to see my best friend and roommate, Jeff.

It's my junior year here at Dalton; I've been boarding with Jeff since our freshman year. Dalton is a boarding school but only about one third of the students actually stay here. The rest are day students. The boarders are mainly students who live too far to drive home each day though some of the day students come from surprisingly far to attend.

Jeff's house is only about an hour away so he goes home most weekends. My case is unusual. My parents are divorced, which isn't unusual, but they live on opposite ends of the country while I board here in the Midwest. When they divorced six years ago, they fought a long, nasty custody battle for me. My mother got primary custody with my father getting summers and select holidays. Then, ironically, after the battle was over things changed. My mom got a job that involved travel all over the world; my dad remarried and had my half sister, Langston. Suddenly the prize they'd fought so bitterly to claim was just so much extra baggage to be tossed aside. OK, maybe I'm suffering from typical teenage resentment over my parent's divorce and that's a little harsh. On the other hand sending me to a boarding school all alone at fourteen instead of switching custody with my dad is a little harsh, don't you think?

Maybe she tried. My dad loves me; I know he does, but he is so wrapped up in my step-mom and baby sister that I can see him not wanting to deal with a teen-aged son full time. I'll admit that I've never asked about it. I don't actually know what went down between them that led to me being here. I don't want to know because frankly I'd rather suspect that my dad doesn't want me than know he doesn't.

Never mind all that. I'm back home at Dalton and telling my best friend Jeff about my summer. We met our freshman year and soon discovered that we had so much in common and became best friends. I was so lonely back then and I'm still grateful to have been so lucky to have ended up with Jeff as a roommate. I know so many guys who can't stand their roommates. The fights that go on in the dorm can get pretty intense. Jeff and I never fight. In the first year, we formed a really tight bond and I'm not ashamed to call it love. Not long after the semester started, he noticed that I spent the weekends alone at school. Most of the boarders, even those who live hours away, go home most weekends. So he started inviting me home with him. I was embarrassed and reluctant to accept at first but now I'm practically part of his family. When I don't go home with him, we stay here together. We go into Columbus to hang out, play video games in the dorm, or go see the latest movies in the theater.

We're both kind of geeks but Jeff is the cool kind of geek if that makes since. It's hard not to love him. He's sweet, funny, and kind of goofy at times. I'm a little more introspective and less gregarious. He's more athletic than I am, playing soccer and basketball. I'd rather curl up with a good book than work up a sweat any day.

We love the same movies, though. We're both ridiculously into science fiction, fantasy, and high tech. I tend to read more books where he's a fan of the graphic novels and anime. We like the same movies but I'm more into film making itself where he just appreciates the end product. I hope to be a filmmaker some day. I'm not sure yet if I'll go into directing, editing, or photography because I love everything about film making and can't decide yet which I love the best.

So here we are in out dorm room, on my bed watching the final cut of the short film I made over the summer. I'm pretty proud of it even if it is only five minutes. You'd be surprised how much work can go into five minutes of screen time.

"So what do you think?" I ask looking at him hopefully.

"Not much happened. I'm not sure I get it."

You know how I said we never fight well I'm rethinking that right now. In fact, I'm thinking of slapping him on the back of the head but I don't of course.

"Not much happens? Are you kidding me? It was epic. There's the struggle between right and wrong, the search for love and acceptance, the action climax, and the classic happy ending!"

"It kind of looked like a Pepsi commercial."

I sigh and admit, "That's because it is a Pepsi commercial. That doesn't mean I'm a sellout," I continue defensively. "Winning the Pepsi challenge is a really sweet deal. I could use that on my resume. So come on, do you have any idea how much work went into the skateboard sequence? Shooting that shit is hard. And the vertigo zoom, didn't you notice the vertigo zoom?"

He just looks puzzled so I queue up the vertigo zoom shot and play it again.

"Oh, that! I had no idea that had a name. I've seen them do it in movies. It's kind of weird because it makes you feel like there is something happening in the guy's brain. How do you do that?"

"Hitchcock invented it for Vertigo. That's why it's called the vertigo zoom. He used it literally for a guy who had vertigo but now it's used to symbolize a kind of mental vertigo when you want to emphasize that something important just changed mentally for the protagonist."

"But how do you do it?" he asks again.

I smile because no one asks me things like that except Jeff. He has no idea what he wants to do with his life but he has such a curious analytical mind that I bet he'll be a scientist or an engineer some day.

"You zoom in while you dolly out. That way the subject stays the same but the background completely changes perspective. In professional movies, they have computer controlled cameras to get it perfect but I did it by hand," I answer proudly.

"So where did you get the skateboard dude? He had some rad skills. I think that was the best part."

Now I seriously want to hit him because the skateboarder's skills really aren't what I wanted him to notice. It's about the my filmmaking skills, is that so hard to get?

He notices my look and says, "What? Content matters, dude!"

It's an old argument we have every time I gush about how well made a movie is, how fantastic the cinematography looked, how the editing was cutting edge (no pun intended), etc and he says "Sure, I guess but the story didn't make any sense at all."

"Well, the content is supposed to be 'go have a Pepsi', so does that work at least?"

"Totally. I'm thirsty now." He walks over to our mini-frig, pulls out two Frescas, and hands one to me when he sits back down. We both addicted to Fresca. Jeff introduced me in our freshman year. I pop the can and take a sip.

"So you want content? I'll show you content! I call this series 'Langston does adorable stuff demonstrating her adorable adorableness as the most adorable little sister in the history of time'"

"Seriously?"

"It's a working title. I love my little sister, so sue me."

We watch several videos of Langston before he interrupts with, "Wait, who is that? Wasn't she in your Pepsi commercial? Is she a cousin or something?"

"Nope. That's my girlfriend, Jennifer," I reply smugly. I'd been wondering how I could drop this exciting bomb without sounding like a bragging douchbag.

"Girlfriend?"

He looks more than a little shocked.

"Dude! You don't need to be that shocked about it. I know I'm not hot like you are but I'm not so hideous that the idea of me having a girlfriend should be that unbelievable."

"No, of course not. It's just …I just didn't know that you…"

"Had a girlfriend? Well, duh. I hadn't told you yet. She's not really my girlfriend though. She's technically my ex-girlfriend. OK, not technically, actually, she dumped me."

"I just found out you have a girlfriend and she's already dumped you? I missed the entire relationship?"

I shrug trying to look nonchalant about it.

"Well, it was just a summer fling. At least according to her it was. We really got along and I thought it was a little more but you know what they say…it is better to have loved and lost, yada, yada, yada."

"You were in love with her?"

"No, not really. I just like her so much. And," I lower my voice conspiratorially, "we did stuff."

"Why are you whispering? What stuff, sex? Did you guys have sex?"

"Sort of. We made out most of the summer and she let me touch her breasts. I say she let me but here's a secret that girls don't want guys to know – they totally love having their breasts touched! At least she did. Then the last week before the summer is over, we were making out, things were getting really heated, I had her shirt and bra pulled up, and I decided to go for it. She was grinding into me so hard that I was trying to not jizz in my pants and I just started sucking on her nipple. I still can't believe I did it but the next part was even better. She liked it so much the she really dug in, started making all these noises, and she came in my lap. So what could I do? I jizzed in my pants. I couldn't help it. So technically, I think that was sex even though there were two layers of clothes between our privates. What do you think?"

Jeff is just staring at me with a strange expression that I can't really interpret.

"TMI?" I ask embarrassed.

"No, I just didn't expect that. Did you like it?"

"Of course I liked it!" I laugh.

He looks somewhat sad which wasn't my intention at all.

"Come on, Jeff. You could get a girlfriend if you just tried. I can't believe I had one before you. If you'd agreed to go to the Country Day - Dalton mixers last year, the girls would have been all over you. You have to go this year. At least to be my wingman."

"I'll go for you. It's a deal; we'll go to all the mixers this year."

"Why wouldn't you go before?"

"It's just not my thing. I'm not looking for a girlfriend."

"Have you even kissed a girl?"

"Sure. Just once."

It's strange that we've never talked about this before. Jeff and I have talked about everything but sex. Maybe because we go to an all boy's school, the topic of girls just doesn't seem to come up.

"Tell me. I told you about my first sexual experience, you have to tell me about your first kiss. It's only fair."

"There's not that much to tell. I was at a party in eighth grade and we were playing spin the bottle. It landed on me so I kissed Beth Boston. I gave it my all and I think I rocked her world."

"Did you like her?"

"Not like that. I was just playing the game." He had a guarded expression when he said it and I am sure there was more but I don't push the issue. Somehow, I feel that I insulted or upset Jeff and I don't even know what I did wrong. I really can't think of anything worse than having Jeff mad at me.

"Enough talk of ex-girlfriends! Do you want to go for a pizza and a movie?"

"I'd love to," he beams. That's more like it. Jeff just lights up the room when he smiles. It's so infectious that I'm practically laughing already as we head out.

xXx

We walk into the Warbler's meeting and I high five Jon and Aaron as we go by. Jeff and I make ourselves comfortable on one of the couches near the back of the room. It's better for texting snide comments to each other during the meeting. We'd be reprimanded if we were caught. Wes is already at the table fondling Gaveley as we're waiting. OK, let me explain. The rumors of Wes' unnatural fondness for that gavel are _probably_ exaggerated. There is no actually proof that he named it Gaveley. No one really knows for sure that he sleeps with it under his pillow. The Warblers are a gossipy bunch and the way he fondles that thing is probably just a nervous habit.

I feel a twinge of guilt because we might have caused it. At the end of the school year, the Warblers elect the next year's council. Last spring we elected Dave, Thad, and Wes with Wes winning the chair. That meant he was in charge of the gavel. As is tradition, the last meeting of the year is supposed to be presided over by the incoming council. As a joke, Jeff and I stole the gavel before the meeting so Wes couldn't properly call the meeting to order. In our defense, it was Jon's idea and we had no idea Wes would have a complete nervous breakdown. I mean, who knew? It was just a joke. Now instead of leaving the gavel in the meeting room like the previous chairmen, Wes keeps it with him.

Blaine is up front chatting with Dave as Thad stands by in case Blaine decides to glance in his direction. Blaine is a nice enough guy if a bit clueless. Thad practically drools all over him whenever they are in the same room and he never seems to notice. Blaine transferred into Dalton at the beginning of last year. At first he was a skittish, shy boy but this year he's really come out of his shell. He seems to have adopted a dapper persona and I think he's smozzing the council for solos. I auditioned twice last year and still havn't been picked. Jeff, ever the optimist, has auditioned no less than five times!

"I hereby call this Warbler's meeting to order," announces Wes with a bang of his gavel. "The first order of business is introduction of the Warbler candidates who will be auditioning for us today. I'll remind the candidates that Warblers are selected based on talent and attitude. We don't have a set number of places in the choir so if you all demonstrate that you have what it takes to be a Warbler, you'll be invited to join."

The first candidate is a freshman who introduces himself as Trent. He starts singing "Make a Man Out Of You" and he has a nice enough voice. It seems like a strange choice to audition with but he does the smart thing and sings it acapella. Bringing music is a mistake many talented singers make with auditioning. We're an acapella choir so even though there isn't any rule about auditions, it makes a better impression on the council if you respect the tradition.

I don't really pay attention as the four other candidates audition. Jeff and I are texting back and forth. Since it is only the second week of school there isn't really much to talk about but that never stopped us before.

_** movies, Friday? - J**_

_** nothing good playing - N**_

_** Resident Evil? - J**_

_** ack! - N**_

_** 3D :) - J**_

_** No No No - N**_

_** srsly? bored :(- J**_

_** TV? DVD? Read? - N**_

_** Boring zzz - J**_

_** We could play metroid - N**_

"Junior member, Blaine Anderson, the floor is yours," announces Wes.

"Thank you, I appreciate the opportunity to speak about my idea. Warblers, I was privileged last year to be invited to join your esteemed organization. And while I truly enjoyed performing for alumni fund raisers and the many invitationals we attended. This year, I propose we do things a little ... differently."

Chaos erupts as several Warblers express their outrage at the suggestion that anything ever be done differently. Wes bangs his gavel rapidly until everyone settles down.

"Look, look. Hear me out. All I'm suggesting is that instead of practicing songs just for ourselves, that we add an audience to some of our performances when we try out new arrangements. I'm suggesting that we give impromptu performances ..."

Dave looks at Blaine sternly.

He continues, "_On campus._ For just the student body. It will be a great morale buster for everyone and we can get some feedback on our arrangements before we do our formal presentations."

"This is a very interesting proposal you have, Warbler Blaine," says Wes noncommittally.

"I think it's will enhance the standing of the Warblers at Dalton," insists Thad. "I approve."

"All those in favor of Warbler Blaine's suggestion to perform for the student body raise your hand."

Dave and Thad raise their hands immediately and soon the rest of the Warblers follow suit.

"Motion carried!" Wes bangs his gavel unnecessarily forcefully. "Are their any other items to be brought to the councils attention before I adjourn the meeting?"

He's clearly surprised when Jeff raises his hand and says, "Permission to speak."

"Yes, Junior Member Jeff Stark, please come forward. You have the floor. Please try to make it brief, we'd all like to get out of here sometime." The Warblers reward his joke with a polite chuckle.

"Esteemed colleagues, I'd like to suggest spicing up our choreography a bit this year. As you know, we usually perform in a tight formation, doing a little two step." Jeff unconsciously does the Warblers signature move.

"You mock us, sir!" Thad practically shouts.

"No, I didn't mean to. I just meant maybe we could step up our game by adding a little more variety. Like maybe something like this."

Jeff does a dance that I like to call "Oh my god is that a spider?" It's positively adorable so I give him an encouraging thumbs up.

"There are no new steps!" declares Dave.

"We can't do that. It's ridiculous," agrees Thad.

"Dave, Thad, I will have order," declares Wes with a loud bang of Gaveley. I see a pattern that I predict is going to carry through the semester. The power of the gavel has gone to Wes' head. Too bad. He seemed like a pretty nice guy.

"I agree," he continues. "We can't have the Warblers dancing around like pop stars."

"It would be undignified," agrees Thad.

Jeff looks crushed. I really feel bad for him but there's nothing I can do. He doesn't give up though.

"Maybe we could add a few spins?" he suggests and demonstrates with a sassy pirouette.

Blaine looks like a dog who's just seen his master throw a ball. He looks over at Thad and gives the older boy puppy dog eyes. I rethink my assessment of Blaine. Maybe he isn't as clueless about Thad's crush as I thought. He's apparently not above using it to get his way. He must be a fan of spinning because the look is clear. He's practically begging for Thad to agree.

"Maybe, some very discreet, dignified, pirouettes - _by the lead singer only_ - could be added to our choreography," suggests Thad.

"I don't think we need to vote on it," agrees Wes. "Let the record reflect that discreet, dignified, pirouettes may be added to our choreography, at some point in the future, where deem appropriate. This meeting is adjourned." Bang goes Gaveley again.

Jeff and I head up to our room to change for dinner since we don't have to wear our uniforms after hours. I usually throw on some sweats and Jeff wears jean and a t-shirt.

"What do you think he meant by lead singer? The Warblers don't have a lead singer," asks Jeff.

I shrug.

"I don't know. Does it matter? Maybe the council has decided that we do now. I'm sure if that's the case there will be auditions for the role."


	2. Chapter 2

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Language: English, **_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3000+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

**Chapter 2 **

**October 2010 Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio**

Jeff and I are sitting in the rec room still talking about the Fringe episode we just watched. The rest of the boys have fled back to their rooms because our Fringe obsession can get a little intense sometimes.

"How stupid is Peter? How can he not know that Olivia has been replaced with that evil Doppelgänger bitch Fauxlivia? He says he loves her but how can I believe that if he can't even tell the difference? He was totally hitting on her in the red universe and I'll bet he doesn't even like blue Olivia. I hate that evil bitch."

At this point, I'm not sure if Jeff just called Peter a bitch or if he's still talking about Fauxlivia. For argument's sake, I assume the latter.

"She's not evil. She's just doing her job. One minute she's a Fringe agent and the next the Secretary of Defense is sending her on a super secret trip to another universe. What's she supposed to do? Betray her whole universe? As far as she knows, the blue universe attacked them."

"I don't think it was in her job description to trick Peter into her evil vagina."

"I kinda think it was. But that's really all Peter's fault for falling for it. Seriously, they just discover a shapeshifter has been fooling a man's wife for years and it doesn't even occur to him to have a Olivia tested? Not that it would have done any good since she isn't a shapeshifter but still he should get a clue."

"We can agree on that. Peter is an ass. And an idiot."

"I know, right? He's supposed to be some sort of genius but he never acts like it."

"And Joshua Jackson is a lousy actor. I think he has only one expression."

"What are you talking about? Pacey was the greatest character in television history and he did some groundbreaking stuff on that show." I can't keep a straight face for long and we both burst out laughing.

"I know!" Jeff manages to choke out between fits of laughter. "We have to go to Pacey-con. We have to!" he snorts. He dries his tears and pulls himself together.

"Seriously, though, why the heck doesn't John Noble have an Emmy yet?" I ask rhetorically.

"Because no one respects scifi," he sighs.

"It's sad. But you know what isn't sad? Halloween. We need to talk costumes, dude. Are we going scary or funny? Superheros, movies, horror? We don't have much time left before the party. We need to get started."

"Zombies. We need to do the most amazing horrific zombies," he suggests.

"Zombies? Isn't that a bit trite and over done?"

"No way. You've seen the Walking Dead previews. It looks fantastic. I'm predicting that zombies are the new vampires. They'll be all the rage."

"The show does look awesome but I'm reserving judgment until I see it. I don't see how zombies are going to replace vampires - who wants to fall in love with a zombie? Vampires are sexy. I think the next big thing is going to be shape-shifters."

"No way. Been there done that. Vampires Diaries has werewolves, True Blood has werewolves, the franchise that must not be named have _giant_ werewolves. Werewolves are already overdone. I'm telling you, it's zombies."

"I'm taking back my first answer and changing to alien invasions. We haven't had a wave of alien invasions in ages. _That's_ the next big thing."

"So we should be aliens at Halloween? What kind?"

"No, actually I think we should go as Bill and Eric. You'd be a great Eric - look at you. You're tall, blond... stunningly handsome. There are way more team Eric girls than team Bill. You'll be a big hit with the ladies. We'll both score."

"Really? That's what you think Halloween is about? Scoring with girls? I want to do kick ass zombie make-up and you want to dress in ordinary clothes with a set of cheap fangs to impress the girls. How exactly are they supposed to know that you're Vampire Bill?"

"Sookaaay," I say with my best Bill Compton impression.

"You're going to go around all night saying "Sookaaay" to every girl you see? Seriously? That's your plan?"

"When you put it that way it doesn't sound nearly as suave as I'd imagined it."

He shakes his head and gets up.

"I'm going back to our room. Let me know when you ready to talk Halloween costumes."

I get up and follow him out the door.

"Zombies it is," I concede with a sigh.

"Really?" he says with a big grin on his face. "You won't regret this. It's going to be the best Halloween yet. We are going to have the best fucking costumes at the party. We'll need to get the makeup this weekend. And we should probably do at least one practice run with it."

**30 October 2010 Westerville, Ohio**

**Private residence**

Claudia Welsh, a senior at Crawford Country Day, was throwing the Halloween party. It never ceases to amaze me how little supervision rich kids have, myself included. Her parents were out of town on Halloween weekend; were they daft or did they want a giant teenage bash complete with under age drinking, sex, and crazy shenanigans?

I probably should just let myself go and get drunk but I'm too chicken. I'm afraid I'll make a complete fool of myself and end up in a video online. Jeff's excuse is that he has to drive.

"Enjoy yourself, dude, I can drive us home," I encourage him. Not because I'm a fan of under age drinking but because Jeff isn't going to make a move on any of the girls sober. That much is clear and as his best friend it's practically my duty to get him laid. It's a crime that he doesn't take advantage of how good looking he is. He's six feet tall, with a shock of blond hair that always manages to look good, six pack abs, and a smile that puts the sun to shame. How can he waste his god-given gifts the way he does? OK, maybe tonight his physical qualities aren't readily apparent because he looks like a shambling week old corpse with a gaping hole in his face. We really out did ourselves with the makeup; we both look disgusting so maybe hitting on girls isn't really the best idea.

"I'm not letting you drive my Mercedes. Mom gave it to my because it's the safest in it's class and I'm not allowed to let anyone else to drive it."

Jeff's reply rouses me from my thoughts and it takes me a second to remember what he's replying to.

"Your mom loves me. I'd think I was on the approved driver list."

"You'd be wrong."

"Fine. We'll just enjoy the party sober."

Jeff amuses himself by chasing after drunk party goers groaning "brains...braaaains" while I try to stay dignified. It doesn't last long because I look like a rotting corpse anyway so I make a game of chasing the girls in the sluttiest costumes. They don't know who I am and they're all pretty drunk. Once we get tired of that, (admittedly, it takes way longer than it should to get tired of it) we mingle with some of our fellow Dalton students for a while before Claudia shuts down the music to make an announcement.

"Listen up, everyone. I have your votes for best costumes tonight. I know some of you spent a great deal of time and money on your costumes. I hold in my hand the very valuable prize that the winner of the individual category will be taking home tonight." She holds a shot glass over her head. "This very valuable and coveted shot glass which I purchased for $1.89 at the convenience store when I made the beer run. Whoohoo!"

Everyone yells and claps at this news because the more useless and trivial the prize the sweeter the win. It's kind of a snobby rich kid rule in life.

"The following six finalist come to the front of the room. The Predator. Alan from the Hangover. The Red Queen. Red Mist. Harley Quinn. And Optimus Prime.

We didn't even make it to finalist? Since we're both zombies, maybe that lessened our odds in the individual category. Oh the other hand, we aren't a group costume either. Not really.

"And the winner is...Alan from the Hangover!"

Everyone claps as he takes the shot glass. How apropos.

"I can't believe it," complains Jeff. "Except for The Predator, none of those are even scary. Halloween is supposed to be scary. A dude from The Hangover? For Halloween?"

I put my arm around Jeff and say, "Hey, it's just a stupid contest. We know we're awesome."

"No, you were right, we shouldn't have gone with zombies."

"Zombies are classic and scary as fuck. You're right. Halloween should be scary."

He tries to smile at me but the zombie makeup makes the attempt a little gruesome.

"And now the winner of the group category," yells Claudia over the noise because everyone seems to have forgotten that there even was another category, "is Team Social Media!"

Jeff just sighs and shakes his head because it doesn't even need to be said. We're in a agreement on that one.

"Everyone, I have just one more announcement. This year we've added a special category. Due to the high number of zombies here tonight we are going to give a prize for best zombie. But there's a catch. You undead freaks are going to have to earn it! Blaine Anderson, get up here now!"

Blaine runs up and grabs the mike. "Zombies, show us your stuff! Hit it!"

The music starts and, of course, it's Thriller. Jeff is clearly...well... thrilled. All the zombies hit the dance floor, myself included, as Blaine belts out the classic Halloween party song. We have so much fun doing the zombie shuffle that winning just doesn't matter anymore.

When the song ends, Claudia grabs the mike from Blaine and yells, "The winner of the zombie Thriller dance off is tall blond one eyed zombie dude! Come on up!"

Jeff collects his prize which turns out to be a pretty cool skull keychain - presumably purchased at the convenience store as well.

What followed seemed to be hours of dancing to Halloween dance songs starting with "Monster Mash" and "I put a Spell on You". I start to feel dizzy from the dancing even without any drinking so we take a break about the time Blaine takes the stage again to sing "Do you Think I'm Sexy?" That guy sure has become an attention whore. He seemed so shy last year. I'm not sure what he's supposed to be. He has his hair in spikes and he's wearing a torn t-shirt and jeans; I'm guessing some kind of punk rocker. The place is getting even rowdier if that's possible and I'm pretty tired of wearing this zombie makeup.

"Jeff, do you want to get out of here? I've had about enough," I shout over the noise.

"OK, I've got what I came for," he says proudly holding up his keychain.

Blaine walks up and drapes his arm around Jeff's shoulder.

"You are sooo tall," he slurs. He looks at me and whispers loudly, "Jeff is so tall and blond and hot. Can I tell you a secret? I'm gay!"

"That's not really a secret, Blaine," I point out logically even though he clearly _really_ drunk.

"Blaine, you are seriously wasted. Do you have a ride back to the dorm?" asks Jeff helpfully.

Blaine wraps his arms around Jeff's neck and says, "You are so tall. I love guys who are taller than me. It's so awesome."

"How nice for you, being so short and all," I point out.

He let's go of Jeff and focuses back on me for a second.

"You wanna know a secret? Shhh... It's very secret..."

Jeff interrupts him before he can share yet another not secret secret "OK, that's enough, Blaine. We're taking you back to the dorm to sleep it off. Come on, dude." Jeff wraps an arm around Blaine and looks at me expectantly. "A little help here, Nick?"

We half walk / drag him toward the front of the house.

"Jeff, you are so manly and so strong. I bet you could just sweep me up in your arms and carry me!"

"Not gonna happen, dude. You are drunk but you can still walk. Just put one foot in front of the other," insists Jeff.

We shove Blaine into the back seat and drive back to Dalton. He sleeps most of the way except once he sits up, yells, "Best party ever! Whoo!" then falls back apparently asleep. Unfortunately, he's still passed out when get there so Jeff does have to carry him after all.

"We could leave him in the car," I suggest.

"Are you kidding me? I'm lucky he didn't vomit on the way over. No way I'm leaving him over night. It's OK, I can carry him."

We get to his floor before he wakes up and starts screaming bloody murder.

"Zombies! Zombies!"

Jeff puts him down. "Blaine calm down. It's just us - Nick and Jeff. It's just makeup."

"Oh. Righteous! Best Halloween Party ever!"

Luckily, we aren't far from his room so we manage to get him onto his bed without another ruckus. Blaine looks up at Jeff and pouts, "don't you think I'm sexy? You can fuck me if you want. I have a tight virgin ass. I swear, it's never been touched."

"Sorry, dude. Not happening. Just sleep it off."

"Why don't you love me?"

"You're not even going to remember this tomorrow," Jeff says kindly and heads to the door. I follow quickly.

"Jeff, what the hell was that about?"

"He's just drunk."

"No, I don't think that's all it was."

"I'm not talking to you about this in this makeup. We'll talk later, OK?"

"OK, we'll get cleaned up then talk.

We went pretty heavy duty on the special effects so we're peeling off latex for some time. Jeff showers first and I wonder if he's going be asleep when I get out of the shower. He isn't. He's sitting on his bed in his pajama pants when I get out. I sit next to him and say, "what the heck was that about? Does Blaine have some sort of crush on you?"

"We went out a couple of times. I wasn't interested in pursuing it and he's having trouble letting go."

I hear the words but I don't really understand so he clarifies, "I'm gay."

"Oh. Why didn't you tell me?"

"Why didn't you tell me that you were straight?"

"I kinda did when I told you about my girlfriend. In fact, telling you about my first sexual experience with a girl might have been the perfect opener for the 'I'm gay' revelation."

"That's fair. I was afraid...I was afraid that you wouldn't want to room with me or be my friend any more."

"Are you insane in the brain? Do you think I'm some kind of homophobe? Jeff, you're my best friend and I love you."

"If you start saying no homo after that, I will smack you."

"I'd hope so. Only douche bags say that. You know it's true don't you? You might as well be afraid that I won't want to be your friend because you have freaky blond hair."

"My hair is not freaky."

"It is too. But I like it. It's part of what makes you you. Come here." I hold out my arms.

"Seriously? You want to hug your half naked gay roommate?"

"I want to hug my best friend."

I hold onto him for a minute before adding, "you don't have to hide anything from me, OK?"

We pull apart and I look at him expectantly.

"OK"

"Does your family know?"

"Yeah. My brother was the first to find out. I started going though stuff when I was about thirteen and he helped me figure things out. Then my dad tried to give me the sex talk and I had to tell him I was gay because his sex talk started with the dangers of pregnancy. I thought I got out of it but then he came back two weeks later with an entirely different sex talk. All I'm going to say is that it was traumatically detailed. There are some words you just don't want to hear coming from your father's mouth. Like lube. Also, penetration."

"Wow. I can't imagine my dad doing that. I got a book."

"You're lucky. My brother had to listen to a lecture on the importance of clitoral stimulation."

"But your parents are cool with it?"

"I suppose. We've never talked about it. After my dad gave me the sex talk, we never said a word about it again."

"So this thing with Blaine? Why didn't you want to keep seeing him? He's seems nice enough."

"He is. He just got a little too intense too fast. We only went on two dates and he thought he was in love with me. It was a little disconcerting so I ended it before things got worse. I don't think there was any chemistry there anyway. I didn't feel that spark."

"Did you guys kiss? I'm sorry, is that too personal?"

"It's fine. I want to tell you. Yeah, we kissed and made out a little but like I said, no spark."

I look at the clock and realize that it's three am. We don't have class tomorrow but still.

"It's late we should get some sleep."

"Thanks, Nick, for being my friend and accepting me. It means a lot.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Language: English, **_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3300+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

**Chapter 3**

**8-12 November 2010, Westerville, Ohio**

I wake and my head is pounding, my body is aching, and I feel hot all over.

"Jeff," I groan, "I don't think I can go to class. I feel so sick."

Jeff doesn't answer. He's still in bed and he doesn't look so good either. I manage to roll out of bed and crawl over to him because standing up just isn't an option now.

"Jeff, Jeff," I say as I shake him. "Please wake up." He opens his eyes briefly but just moans pitifully and closes them again. I put my hand on his forehead; he's burning up.

"Jeff, how do you feel? Are you sick?" I ask stupidly.

"No shit, Sherlock." That's good. If he can manage to be sarcastic it can't be that bad. I almost to decide to just get back in bed but he's so hot and then he says, "I'm freezing" and wraps his covers around himself.

I call the school nurse to see what I should do. She tells me she'll come to our room to check on us soon. That's not actually comforting because it must be serious. I get back into bed and fall asleep until I hear pounding. The trek to the door is long and arduous and I'm so proud by the time I open it that I'm pretty miffed that the nurse doesn't congratulate me on my accomplishment. I'm exhausted so I fall back on my bed and try to go back to sleep. Unfortunately, Nurse busybody insists on asking all kinds of stupid questions about my symptoms and takes my temperature.

"Did you get a flu shot, young man?"

"No," I answer sullenly because it's obvious now that she thinks my misery is my own fault.

"How unfortunate. Here take these and drink this."

I take the handful of pills she hands me without bothering to ask what they are then I drift in and out of consciences as she talks to Jeff. Somewhere through the fog I hear the word hospital and that jolts me awake.

"What's going on?"

"Your roommate is much sicker than you and I'm sending him to the hospital as a precaution. You both have the flu so you can't stay in the dorm. You need to go home and recuperate without infecting anyone else. I'll call you're mother."

"I can't go home."

"You have to. Don't worry I have your contacts on file. I'm sure your mom will be here soon."

"No, she lives in California."

"I'll call your father then."

"Vermont."

She a little taken aback by this news and takes some time to formulate her next answer.

"I'll call your mom and she'll have to make some kind of arrangement. It's not my problem."

Everything is fuzzy for awhile but I think someone takes Jeff away and I protest that I need to go with him. Maybe I dreamed it but next coherent moment is Mrs. Stark talking to me.

"Nick, sweetheart, I'm taking you home to stay with us. Your mother called me and asked if we could look after you while you sick. Do you think you can make it to the car?"

I must have because I'm in the Stark guest room aka Danny's room. Danny is Jeff's older brother who is in college now. He was a senior at Dalton when we were freshmen and he's pretty cool. I usually stay in his room when I sleep over at Jeff's. Technically that is. Most of the time Jeff and I end up staying together in his room simply because we talk or play games until we pass out. I'm not even sure what day it is but I have a vague recollection of Mrs. Stark bringing me soup and juice more than a few times.

I stumble out of bed and shuffle down the hall to the bathroom. I'm feeling much better and clear headed but by the time I get out of the shower, I'm a little shaky. I head down to Jeff's room anyway because through it all, I've been worried.

Jeff is sitting up in his bed with a grin on his face, chuckling softly at something he's watching on his iPad. He looks like he feels much better than I do. I swan dive onto his bed and just lie there hoping for the best.

"Dude, I'm so glad you're here! I've been bored out of my skull," he chirps with excessive enthusiasm.

"Stop being so perky. It's annoying," I moan. "How is it you are fine when you're the one who ended up in the hospital?"

"They were just overreacting. My fever was too high or something so they kept me until it came down and then sent me home. It's no big deal. It's just the flu - stop being such a wimp!"

He punches me in the arm and I whimper like the girly man I am - I'm not proud.

"Nick! I'm so glad to see you out and about. Jeff has been desperate to see you but I told him to let you rest."

I turn over to see that this second ridiculously upbeat message is coming from Jeff's mom who is carrying a tray.

"Hi, Mrs. Stark. Thanks so much for taking care of me," I say with a much gratefulness as I can muster.

"Here's some soup and apple juice for you sweetheart," she says as she sets the tray on the nightstand. "Nick do you want to eat in here? I'll go get yours if you want to hang with Jeff for awhile."

"That'd be great, thank you so much."

After she leaves I ask Jeff, "It that unnatural level of cheerfulness genetic or did you have to go to a special perky school?"

He just laughs and starts slurping down his soup without replying. After we eat, I lean up against Jeff to watch some shows on his iPad.

"Let's watch Vampire Diaries," he suggests.

"What day is it?"

"Friday, we missed a whole week of school; it's going to be a bitch to make up."

"Wow, that's crazy. I don't even remember much of it at all. Just a few blurry things. I know your mom was bringing me soup, juice, and giving me pills to take but it seems more like it should be Tuesday or Wednesday.

"I know, weird! I was much better yesterday but you were still so out of it that Mom told me to let you rest."

"I can't believe you waited for me, I know how much you love Ian Somerhalder," I tease him. He blushes and turns away.

"I don't have a crush on Ian Somerhalder, it's a really good show. You like it too."

"Right, not Ian Somerhalder - you have a crush on Damon because he's a hot evil vampire."

"They should just let him be evil. I'm tired of sensitive Damon. And I just like the great story telling; I'm not crushing on him. Just because I'm gay doesn't mean I crush over every hot guy on television."

"So you admit it."

"Admit what?"

"That he's hot."

"Oh shut up and just watch the show."

Despite sleeping most of the week away, I fall asleep on Jeff's shoulder. Or at least I presume that what happened because I'm pressed against him with my head on his shoulder as I drift into consciousness feeling warm and fuzzy. I'm drooling and I'm surprised that he didn't just push me off of him.

"Hey," I say sleepily. "Sorry about that. I should probably go back to my own room before you're soaked in my disgusting drool."

"It's OK. Stay, I'm bored here by myself."

"I'm not much company," I protest.

"I don't mind. You should see this!"

I look down at the screen and he hits replay. It's the Warblers singing "Teenage Dream".

"Damn, we missed the performance. I'd forgotten about that. At least someone filmed it."

"Look how enthusiastic Blaine is. It looks like he's flirting with the camera."

"Or someone next to the camera," I point out. "Do you know who filmed it?"

"No. I'm sure we'll find out when we get back. It looks like Warblers 'impromptu' performances are a hit. Blaine even did a little spin there. Do you think the council will relent on some new steps?"

"Just keep trying; they have to give in someday." I yawn and sink down under the covers. "Do you mind if I sleep in here with you?"

He runs his hand through my hair and says softly, "Not at all."

**15 November 2010, Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio**

We're sitting at the Warbler table in the dining room on our first day back from being out sick. Turns out that we missed some excitement while we were gone.

"So the so called new kid was really a spy from McKinley," recounts Dave.

"Blaine invited him for coffee after we performed. The weird thing is that by the time we met him at the Coffee Bean, he'd changed into another outfit. Who does that?" adds Wes.

"That's not the best part," supplies Dave. "Blaine managed to let the kid know that he was gay and single in one sentence. Smooth move."

"He wasn't interested in the spy thing, he was just hitting on him?" asks Jeff.

"That's how I saw it," answers Dave.

"That's not all, Blaine did not stop talking about him all week. Kurt this, Kurt that. He even managed to get his phone number and has been texting him every five minutes," says Wes.

"I can't believe he falling for this innocent victim act of Kurt's. The kid is obviously some kind of operator," pouts Thad. "Really who changes for a coffee date? Not that it was a date."

I laugh because Thad is just too obvious.

"Don't worry Thad, I'm sure it's just a passing fancy. Remember when Blaine thought he was in love with the barista at the Coffee Bean?" I offer.

"Or how about the time he wouldn't shut up about Jesse St. James after that invitational?" countered Wes.

"So where is Blaine?" asked Jeff.

"He went to McKinley to see Kurt" admitted Dave. "I promised to cover for him in class."

"McKinley is in Lima," exclaims Thad incredulously. "That's ninety minutes away!"

"Maybe this one's real," supposed Jeff.

Wes turns serious and says, "All kidding aside, I think Kurt was really having some issues and Blaine is just being a good friend. It isn't easy being gay in a public school. Not everyone has the privileges that we have. Blaine had a pretty hard time in junior high and I think he just sees a chance to make up for that with this kid."

**23rd November 2010, Columbus, Ohio**

**The airport**

I stare in shock at the destination board. My flight is cancelled and it isn't the only one. I call my dad to find out what to do.

"Dad! My flight is cancelled. I'm sitting here in the airport right now. Should I try to book an alternate route?"

"I don't think that's going to work. There's a huge snowstorm blanketing everything north of Albany. Even if you manage to get to New York, you couldn't get to Rockingham. I so sorry you're going to miss Thanksgiving with us but you're going to have to stay in Westerville for the holiday."

"No, that's not fair. I won't see you until spring break. I'm with Mom for Christmas."

"Sometimes life's not fair, son. I can't control the weather. There's nothing I can do."

"The school's closed for the holiday. What am I supposed to do?"

"You'll have to stay at a hotel. Use the emergency credit card I gave you."

"Fine, I'll spend Thanksgiving eating hotel food."

"Don't try to guilt trip me about this; it isn't my fault. And remember I see the bill."

"Yeah, I get it. Don't buy porn with the emergency credit card."

"Actually, I meant don't rack up a ridiculous room service bill. But that too."

"Bye, Dad. I'll call you guys tomorrow."

My phone rings before put it away.

"Hi, Jeff. What's up?"

"I'm sitting here watching the news and there is a huge snowstorm on the East coast. I'm assuming since you answered that you aren't on the plane?"

"No, my flight was cancelled."

"What are you going to do? Are you going to go to California instead?"

"No, my mom is in Japan on business. I'm stuck in Westerville. I guess I'll order turkey and dressing from room service at a hotel. I was just about to call a cab."

"Don't you dare. Sit tight and I'll come get you. You can stay with us."

"No, I don't want to be a bother. Thanksgiving is for family," I protest feebly hoping that the offer is real because I do not want to spend the holiday alone.

"Shut up. I'm already heading to my car. I'll probably be there in about ninety minutes."

I look for a comfortable spot to curl up with my iPad and download a book to read while I'm waiting. The Starks live about an hour to the West in a rural area called Magnetic Springs. When Jeff finds me near baggage claim (I texted him where'd I'd be waiting for him), I throw myself into his arms, shameless in my gratitude for his rescue. I pretend to be tough but I'm just seventeen and sometimes being without a real family is more than I can bear without crying.

"Hey, it's OK. It's OK," he says soothingly. He doesn't bother to elaborate, just comforting me.

"Sorry, dude," I say when I pull away. "I just got a little overwhelmed. Thanks so much for this. Are you sure your parents are OK with it?"

"Of course they are. We can't leave you stranded on Thanksgiving. You're going to have a great time with us."

**24rd November, 2010 Magnetic Springs, Ohio **

**The Stark House**

I wake up a little confused by my whereabouts. Then I remember that I'm in Jeff's bed. There had been some debate about it the night before. Jeff's brother is home for the holiday so of course, I'm not sleeping in his room. Jeff offered to sleep on the floor or even downstairs on the couch but I told him to stop being so stupid. I've slept in this bed with him before and he was gay then so why should it matter now that I know he's gay? Sometimes my best friend can be an idiot. He keeps acting like I'm going to have a big gay freak out one day even though he should know me better then that.

I smell the most amazing smell that I know from experience is warm maple syrup. That can only mean that Mrs. Stark is making waffles. My mouth is already watering. Jeff is gone from the bed, obviously getting a head start on the waffles so I quickly get dressed and run down the stairs. I'm greeted by the sight of Jeff, his sister Maggie, and his brother Danny. Maggie is a senior at Crawford Country Day. She's often home when I'm visiting. She glares at me and I give her a wink and a smirk. I have pictures from the Halloween party that she'd rather not have go public. They involve a slutty nurse costume and body shots but I haven't decided what I want for them. I wouldn't really post them on the internet or give them to her mom but she doesn't know that.

I sit down next to Jeff and say, "Good morning, Stark family."

Mrs. Stark turns around and says brightly, "Good morning Nick. Here, have the first waffle of the batch," she say as she puts the waffle in my plate."

"Mom!" complain both Danny and Maggie at the same time.

"Manners!" she chides them. "Nick is our guest. Would you like some eggs and bacon?"

"Yes, please," I answer with a smile. She doesn't really need to ask but she always does.

I cut the waffle in half and put half on Jeff's plate before I drown mine in syrup.

"That's not fair," hisses Maggie. Jeff responds by sticking his tongue out at her before digging in.

"Thanks, Nick," he says between bites.

I just smile and keep eating because Mrs. Stark's waffles are the best. Danny mutters something I can't quite hear but whatever it was it earns a glare from Jeff. Soon enough everyone has waffles including Mr. Stark who joins us just in time to get the last one.

I love this - sitting around the breakfast table with Jeff's family. Everyone is laughing and teasing, and as much as I pretend to be annoyed by their ridiculous level of bubbly optimism, I secretly love every minute of it. I wonder if my parents were ever so happy. I know my dad is with his new wife. I love my time with them and Langston but even though my step-mom is far from wicked, I still feel like an intruder. Weird, the Starks aren't even related to me but I've been made so welcome here. I refuse to let myself take it for granted though.

After breakfast, we hang out in the kitchen helping Mrs. Stark prep for dinner. She puts everyone to work chopping vegetables, mixing, rolling pie crusts. I really have no idea what we were doing, I just follow her instructions. Seeing the entire family in the kitchen working on the cooking together was surprising. Maybe it shouldn't have been but I had the idea that Mrs. Stark would fix dinner while the guys hung out and watched TV. Color me politically corrected. We put all the dishes in the refrigerator to be cooked later and retire to the living room together to watch TV.

The rest of the day is a mix of eating and watching football. I'm not really a football fan but that's what you're supposed to do on Thanksgiving so we did. But the end of the day, I'm so stuffed that I can't imagine eating again and I thought I would fall asleep as soon as I hit the mattress. Instead, Jeff and I lay facing each other talking.

"This was the best Thanksgiving of my life, Jeff. You're family is so wonderful."

He laughs softly and says, "Everyone thinks that about other people's families. I'm just glad that you're here. I mean instead of in a hotel not that you didn't get to go home," he amends quickly.

"Yeah, as much fun as I had, I really miss my dad. I don't see him that often. I'm going to Skype tomorrow so I can at least see Langston for a little while."

"What's it like having a little sister?"

"You have a sister."

"She's older. It isn't the same."

"It's strange. Sometimes I think I should be jealous of how much my dad loves her but I never am because I love her too. It's like I have someone else that needs me to protect her and take care of her. I know it doesn't make sense because I can't do those things. I'm not with her everyday but I know if she needed me, I'd do anything to keep her safe and happy. I'd give her anything."

"Wow," he says quietly. "That's amazing. You're such a good person, Nick."

"I'm sure your brother and sister feel the same about you."

He snorts, "Maybe."

"We should try and sleep," I suggest.

"Why? We don't have anything to do tomorrow. We should stay up all night!"

"Doing what?"

"We could play video games or just talk."

We do both and it's probably close to four am by the time we fall into an exhausted sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Language: English, **_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3400+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

**Chapter 4**

**01 December 2010, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio**

We finally get to meet the famous Kurt Hummel that Blaine has been babbling about for nearly a month. I'll say one thing for him; the boy has a sense of humor. Unfortunately, no one warned him that the council takes their role seriously. Jeff and I stay stony face during his canary jokes but I saw Blaine crack a smile. I think this time it's true love instead of just another infatuation.

_**Wes looks like he swallowed a bug! - N**_

_**I can't believe he did that! - J**_

_**One doesn't joke about the mascot :) - N**_

_**Oh noes, not song selection suggestions! - J**_

_**Wes, take control now. Don't allow that kind of insubordination - N**_

_**Gaveley do something...-J**_

_**Oh thank god, normalcy has been restored - J**_

_**awww, his little soul looks crushed. Blaine go comfort your man :( - N**_

_**Poor thing, why didn't Blaine warn him? -J**_

xXx

"Hi, I'm Nick and this is my roommate, Jeff. Welcome to Dalton and the Warblers."

"Thanks. Sorry I was out of bounds in there, I just didn't realize."

"It's OK," Jeff reassures him. "The council is a little stuffy but Thad, Dave, and Wes are really nice once you get to know them. Everyone is. You'll like it here. Are you boarding?"

"No, I'll be commuting. My family can't afford to board me. Tuition alone is petty steep."

"Wow, that's rough," I sympathize. "Ninety miles, twice a day."

"If you ever need a place to crash, you can just stay with us," offers Jeff.

"Of course," I comment, "you probably won't be taking Jeff up on his offer any time soon since Blaine boards here too."

Kurt blushes and looks down nervously.

"I'll keep that in mind. Thanks for the welcome. Sorry to run off on you but Blaine and I have plans, so I really need to go." He gets a dreamy look every time he says Blaine's name. It looks like Blaine's affections are returned for once.

Jeff and I head to dinner together.

"So what do you think?" I ask him.

"About what?"

"Kurt"

"I think Blaine's a lucky guy."

"You're not interested are you?"

He shrugs. "It doesn't matter, he's taken."

**02 December 2010, Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio**

It's an important day - auditions for sectionals. I'm surprised to find that Kurt has been invited to audition for a solo. I doubt he understands what an honor that is. He literally joined the group yesterday so it's just a formality to honor him. I wonder if anyone told him he wouldn't be actually considered for a solo so soon?

Jeff is up first and he knocks it out of the park with "Safety Dance." He has a beautiful voice and it's shocking to me that this is his sixth audition for a solo. It might have been a bit much to have so much dancing in his audition but I know the council is going to crack on that eventually. Blaine has them eating out of his hand and he wants to add choreography as much as Jeff does.

Maybe the council last year just didn't like Jeff's song selections. Based on the performances we've been doing, I think the Warblers are going to do more top forty this year, so he has a better chance.

I decide to go with the classic Beatles song "In My Life." You can't go wrong with the Beatles, I reason, and it's one of my favorites. I don't sound as good as Jeff but still I think I might make the cut.

I recognize Kurt's selection immediately from the music and I'm a little startled. It seems pretty ambitious to rearrange "Don't Cry for Me Argentina" for a tenor and I wonder why he would bother. Then he sings and it is amazing. He _isn't_ a tenor; he's a countertenor and his song selection now makes more sense. The entire room is mesmerized and it's clear the Warblers are impressed with his talent. It's a shame he won't get to showcase it anytime soon.

The three of us sit outside together while we're waiting for the council's decision on the solos.

"So how many times have you auditioned?" Kurt asks. He looks nervous which makes me sure that no one told him he wasn't even going to be considered.

"Three," I reply.

"Six," adds Jeff.

Before I can say anything more Blaine comes out and tells us that we are moving on. Jeff and I hug tightly. When he pulls back and smiles at me, I nearly laugh with excitement even though I don't really care that much about the solo. I hear Kurt ask Blaine for notes as we head in to face Dave, Wes, and Thad.

"Warbler Jeff, Nick," begins Wes. "The first song of the set will be "Soul Sister" with Blaine, of course, taking the lead. Everyone knows their parts so we only need to do a little rearrangement to add Kurt as a countertenor. You've been selected to sing a featured verse each in our second performance of the set at Sectionals. We are going to be doing a Who medley featuring "Behind Blue Eyes", "Who Are You", "Baba O'Reily." Blaine will open, Nick you will be featured second, and Jeff, you'll sing us out. We'll start rehearsal on the arrangement tomorrow afternoon. Are you ready for this honor?"

I look to Jeff for signs that he's disappointed that he won't have an actual solo but he's looks delighted.

"Absolutely," he gushes. "You won't be disappointed!"

"We'll represent the Warblers with dignity and grace," I promise.

**03 December 2010, Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio**

After we do the first run through of the new Who medley, we spend a significant part of Warbler's practice deciding where Kurt will stand in the "Soul Sister" arrangement. Thad wants to put him next to Jeff in the second row. Blaine insists that he should stand on his left in the front row. In the end he gets his way; Dave moves to Blaine's right and Wes moves to the second row. I don't really understand why until I see the video of the practice. My spot is in the back row so I don't see it when we were rehearsing.

All that so Blaine could flirt with his boyfriend during the performance. For once, I feel a little sorry for Thad. He has a fake smile plastered on his face but he barely takes his eyes off of Blaine during the entire song.

**10 December 2010, The Coffee Bean, Westerville, Ohio**

Jeff loves going to the Coffee Bean this time of year. They have the special holiday peppermint mocha for a limited time and he can't resist getting one as often as he can talk me into making the trip. That turns out to be pretty often because I'm pretty addicted to the regular mochas here. I'm not actually a fan of coffee but put enough cream, sugar, and chocolate in it and I'm in heaven.

"Look who else is here," I say, nodding my head in the direction of Blaine and Kurt a few tables over.

"Don't they look adorable together?" Jeff notes. "See how much they flirt with their eyes and how they don't even seem to notice anyone else in the room?"

"Yeah, they do that at school, too. I never thought I'd seen Blaine find real love but it looks like he has. I'm glad to see the end of his crazy infatuations."

"I hope Thad doesn't freak out about it."

"I don't think he will. It doesn't seem to have changed his determination to give Blaine all the solos."

"That's not fair. Blaine is pretty talented, I'm sure the council just wants us to look good."

"You're just saying that because Blaine supports your drive to step up the choreography."

"Maybe," he allows with a smile.

"I wonder why he wears his uniform after hours? Don't you think it's a little strange?"

Most of the boys shed the uniform as soon as they can. Jeff is wearing his Dalton hoodie today – he has a thing for hoodies in the cold weather. He claims that his ears are too delicate for the cold. I ditched my uniform for a jersey and jeans. Of course, the bitter Ohio winter means we had to bundle up for the walk over but it's nice and warm inside and the coffee drinks have banished the lingering effects of the cold.

"It's like armor for him. He feels safe when he's in his uniform. Confident and in charge. That's why he doesn't change," observes Jeff.

"You know this from Blaine or just an observation?"

"Observation. Blaine puts on this dapper persona but it isn't the real him. The uniform helps him keep up the image."

"Maybe he just wants Kurt to feel comfortable since he doesn't have the luxury of changing."

Jeff snorted and gives me his I can't believe you said that look.

"What? He doesn't board here so they usually go out before he heads home."

"He could bring a change of clothes. He hates the uniform but he wears it to fit in. I think he does it to please Blaine which is just silly."

"I wonder what happened to Blaine's tallness requirement. Kurt doesn't fit the type for his other crushes."

"He's taller than Blaine. He's the same height as you are."

"Strange, I always picture him smaller," I muse trying to picture Kurt standing next to me. "Why are we talking about them anyway?"

"What else is there to gossip about?" he asks reasonably.

"What would _your_ ideal boyfriend be like?" I ask him.

"Talk about a non-sequitur," he teases. "If you want to change topics just say so. Are you ready for Christmas?"

"No, I really want to know. You never talk about guys that you like."

"You first. Tell me about your ideal girlfriend."

"No fair, I asked first."

"So? I asked second," he replies smugly because there is no arguing with that logic.

"OK, sure. It's an easy question. She would have a great sense of humor, always laughing and smiling. But not sarcastic or biting. She'd be sweet, kind, and her smile would be the kind that reaches her eyes. Of course, she needs to love science fiction and be willing to listen to me go on and on about movies."

"Nothing about looks? What color will her hair and eyes be? How tall? Will she be pretty?"

"I don't care. She'll be beautiful because she loves me. That's the most important thing about her; she loves me."

"You're such a romantic," he says with something in his voice that sounds like awe.

"Your turn."

"He's shorter than I am, with dark hair and eyes that reflect his deep poetic soul."

"How specific. And personality?"

"He'll be so sweet to me that he'll do little things and not even realize that he's doing them."

"Like what?" I ask as I unwrap my Biscotti. I break it in two and put half on Jeff's saucer because he never remembers to get any. He always smiles like he's found a hidden treasure when I give him half of mine. That's why I do it instead of reminding him to buy his own.

He dips the Biscotti in his coffee and say with a shrug, "Just little things."

"That's it?"

"No, there's more. He's not afraid to cry in front of me and hug me in public."

"I don't know, Jeff. Sounds like a dream man. Maybe you should set your sights on someone realistic."

"Are you ready for Christmas?" he asks changing the subject.

"I already sent my gifts to Dad, Linda, and Langston. Looks like I'm still going to go to California for Christmas but I haven't given up yet. I've been bugging Mom since Thanksgiving to let me go to Vermont instead. It's only fair. It wasn't Dad's fault I didn't see him at Thanksgiving."

"Don't you want to see your mom?" he asks sadly.

"Not really. I spent Thanksgiving with her last year and you know what we did?"

"Yes, you told me all about it."

"We had Chinese take out," I continue ignoring his interruption. Of course, I'd already told him about it last year but I'm venting now. Can't he see that? "Then on Friday, she went to work and I just hung around watching TV. Some holiday. Christmas is going to be so much worse. At least with Dad, there's a tree, presents, and we bake cookies."

"I know," he says softly. "You love Christmas cookies."

"I love making them. Sure they look pretty sloppy by the time Langston puts too much icing and pours on the sprinkles but you can't buy cookies like that."

"We could bake cookies at my house before you go," he offers.

"OK," I agree. I appreciate it but it isn't the same.

"You want to come to the mall with me this weekend? You can help me find presents for Danny and Maggie. Danny, I could probably figure out but you need to help me with Maggie's."

"The mall? This time of year? Why don't you just shop online?"

"Because just wandering around is half the fun. The idea is to get out of the dorm. Please." He gives me the cutest pout so I can't really say no.

"OK, but you owe me."

"Name your price!"

"Some day," I say with my best godfather impression, "I'll ask for a favor…"

That cracks him up because my impressions are terrible.

**11 December 2010, Columbus, Ohio**

_**Sectionals**_

We're standing around in the green room waiting for the vote.

"Are they always that good, Kurt?" Dave asks.

"Actually, I'm shocked Mr. Shue opened with Quinn and Sam. They aren't as good as Finn and Rachel. On the other hand, Santana killed it."

"The girl who sang "Valerie"?" I ask.

"Yeah, again, I'm surprised Mr. Shue didn't go with Rachel but he did the right thing. But who knows? Last year at Regionals we totally nailed it but we came in third place."

Thad shakes his head.

"Maybe the medley was a bad idea," he muses. "Maybe we should have had Blaine sing lead on both performances."

"Relax," interjects Blaine. "Jeff and Nick were perfect. The judges will love it."

We file back out on stage when we hear the announcement for the results.

"...it's a tie. You're both going to regionals."

When we hear those words the Warblers erupt into celebration. Jeff and I hug, spin around a start hugging everyone within reach. Apparently, we did something right because we are going to regionals!

xXx

About half the Warblers left to go home with their parents, including Kurt. The rest of us are on the van back to Dalton. Dave, Wes, and Thad are already talking strategy for Regionals even though it is months away. Jeff is leaning against the window looking half asleep already.

"You're just going to get crick in your neck if you fall asleep like that. Change places with me. Stretch your legs and put your head in my lap," I instruct him as I fold his coat to make a pillow for his head. "You'll be much more comfortable like this."

"Thanks," he mumbles as he closes his eyes.

"Did you see the dancing?" Blaine asks. "I'm telling you guys, it is time to up our game on the choreography."

"You're sounding like a broken record Blaine," admonishes Wes. "That's not who the Warblers are."

"I don't know, I think Blaine may have a point after all," disagrees Dave.

I can see the wheels turning in Thad's head as he looks at Blaine. He finally snaps.

"We need to go all out and do a crazy dance routine. Like a music video with paper flying in the air. Guys doing backflips. Sassy synchronized turns. Everything!"

Blaine looks nonplussed like he never expected to get anywhere with his argument. Wes is outnumbered and has no choice but to give in. I can't wait to tell Jeff. I can't believe he slept through the big choreography decision of 2010.

"We really should make good use of your boyfriend the countertenor, Blaine. A voice like that is really rare" I interject.

"Boyfriend?"

"Kurt...Your boyfriend... You don't have more than one countertenor boyfriend do you?"

"I don't have a boyfriend," he insists. "Kurt's just a friend."

"Um...don't you two go out two or three times a week?"

"We hang out as friends, occasionally," he says a tad defensively.

"Oh, my bad. I shouldn't have assumed."

**14 December 2010, Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio**

Latin is my last class of the day and the only one I don't share with Jeff. He's in French that period. I arrive outside of French but strangely Jeff isn't there. He usually waits for me.

_**Where R U? - N**_

No, answer. That's strange. I head toward the dorms and see Wes.

"Have you seen Jeff?"

"Yeah, he's in the commons dancing with Kurt."

"Dancing with Kurt?" I squeak out. Why would he be dancing with Kurt. That's weird.

"Yeah, I think they're coming up with choreography for our next Warblers number."

"Oh, that kind of dancing."

"What did you think I meant?"

"I don't know. Thanks Wes." I head to the commons where I hear...

_** All the single ladies, all the single ladies**_

_** All the single ladies, all the single ladies**_

_** All the single ladies, all the single ladies**_

_**Now put your hands up**_

What I see when I walk in is...how can I put this? Kurt is standing next to Jeff gyrating his hips in the most obscene and anatomically improbable way. Jeff is attempting the same move with less obscene results. Kurt stops, takes Jeff's hands, puts them on his hips and begins gyrating again saying, "Like this. You have to roll the hips, not just shake them."

"Hey guys, what are you up to?" I interrupt.

Kurt turns the music off.

"Just practicing some dance moves. Jeff, why don't you show Nick those moves that you were showing me?"

"Sure, watch this Nick."

He does a quick move that ends in a spin, then with his hands in the air, he dances back and spins again. I clap when he's done.

"That's great. I'm sure the Warblers can use that. Single Ladies, on the other hand... maybe that isn't the right dance for the Warblers, Kurt."

He laughs with a nervous chuckle, "No, I was just showing Jeff the moves. I don't expect the Warblers to don sequined leotards any time soon. Anyway, I don't think Jon or Aaron can move like I can," he finishes with a wink. Jeff laughs at his joke which I frankly don't think is that funny. Maybe he's just being polite.

"Nick, Kurt and I are going to work on dance moves for a while; do you want to join us?"

"You know, I think I'm going to go do some homework. Finals are coming up soon so maybe more studying and less dancing..." I suggest to Jeff lifting my eyebrow.

"Don't worry, dude. I'm caught up. I'm going to ace finals, you'll see."

"OK, I'll be in our room then. Studying." I leave the room feeling a little uneasy but not really sure why.

xXx

Jeff comes running into the room and jumps on my bed causing my books to fall to the floor.

"Sorry, I'm a little excited."

"About what?" I ask cautiously.

"I thought you'd never ask," he says rapidly. "I have a date!"

"With whom?"

He snorts and punches in the arm for being obscurely grammatically correct.

"Kurt Hummel."

"Isn't he dating Blaine?" I know he isn't but I didn't realize Jeff knew. I didn't tell him because it's obvious that Kurt is into Blaine and I don't want Jeff to get his heart broken.

"No, turns out they are just friends."

"Who told you that?"

"Thad."

"Consider the source."

"I know, right? But I confirmed it with Blaine. He gave me the green light to ask Kurt out so I did!"

"When?"

"Just now, before I came up to tell you."

"No, I meant when are you going out?"

"Oh, tomorrow."

"Isn't that a little soon?"

"What do you mean?"

"Christmas break is coming up, maybe it would be better to ask in January."

"Dude, you think too much. I already asked him to go out with me tomorrow so we'll just see how it goes."


	5. Chapter 5

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Language: English, **_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3000+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 5**_

_**16 December 2010, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

I'm lying on my bed, wearing nothing but my cargo shorts, flipping through the latest pages of American Cinematographer when Jeff charges through the door. He sheds his jacket and tie in record time dropping them on the floor as he unbuttons his shirt.

"Slob much?" I ask.

"Why is it so frakin hot in here?"

"Something's wrong with the thermostat. Maintenance is supposed to come by in the morning to look at it."

Jeff's shirt joins the pile on the floor so I get up and start hanging things up behind him.

"I'm not your mother," I grumble.

"Then why are you picking up my clothes?" he teases.

"So how was your date with Kurt?"

He tumbles on to his bed and sighs dramatically.

"Disastrous."

I plop down on his bed next to him and ask skeptically, "How is that possible? Is he blind? Doesn't he know you're a total catch? Or was it that you didn't like him? He seems smart and funny."

"Blaine."

"What about Blaine? What does he have to do with your date with Kurt?"

"First off there was no date. Kurt apparently didn't notice that I asked him out on a date. As far as I could tell we were just hanging out talking about Blaine because every sentence from his mouth was Blaine this and Blaine that. And I wonder what Blaine is doing at the mall? And do you think Blaine didn't invite me to the mall because he's buying me a present? Oh, isn't Blaine so _dreamy_."

"So he's into Blaine. Maybe if you made your interest clearer he'd move on. Blaine told you that they were just friends."

"Yeah, I think he forgot to mention that to Kurt."

"Well do you like him?"

Jeff shrugs.

"A little but I guess there isn't much chemistry there."

"Don't worry about it. _You_ are totally hot and we'll get you a boyfriend by the end of the next semester."

"I told you, I'm not really looking for a boyfriend."

"You told me you weren't looking for a girlfriend, which makes sense; you're gay."

"Well, I'm not looking for a boyfriend either. Just drop it OK. The whole date thing was a bad idea. It's useless; I'm never going to get o...a boyfriend."

Now he looks depressed and I just can't have that so I roll out of bed, grab my pillow and hit him with it. He sits up and looks at me in shock.

"What are we twelve year old girls?"

I laugh and hit him again. That did it, he laughs and hits me with his pillow. The pillows don't last long though and we are wrestling instead. He's much stronger and faster than I am but I use my knowledge of his weakness to my advantage. He's very ticklish. I have him pinned down on the bed when suddenly he stops laughing and just looks at me. I'm kind of panting and out of breathe as I look down at him. I'm lying on top of him, our skin hot and sticky with sweat, faces just inches apart. I don't know how long we stare before he turns red and says, "Oh god, Nick I'm so sorry."

It takes me a beat longer to realize what he means but then I'm off of him and he sits up with his back to the wall, knees pulled to his chest avoiding my gaze.

"Hey dude, don't worry about," I try to reassure him. "I swear, everybody gets inappropriate boners. It's no big deal."

"You're not creeped out?" he asked still refusing to look at me.

"No, why would I be? If you think I'm hot, that's a compliment. I should be flattered because I know how body conscience you gays are. I mean, if I turn you on then I must be smokin and I shouldn't be all over you like that. You're only human."

That gets a smile out of him and he finally looks at me out of the corner of his eye.

"You're terrible."

"That's right, I am. But still if you want to jerk off while fantasying about this?" I say point to myself, "Seriously, it would just be an ego boost so go ahead."

That completely cracks him up and the tension is shattered as we both burst out laughing.

When we stop laughing he asks seriously, "Honestly, it doesn't bother you that I'm gay? You don't mind living with me?"

I scoot over and pull him into a hug which he resists at first but I refuse to let him go. I want him to understand that it is really OK.

"Hey, you're my best friend. You been there for me since I was fourteen and that's not going to change. I love you, OK?"

"I love you, too," he says squeezing me tight.

I pull away to see he's tearing up a little.

"Are we cool?" I ask with a smile.

"Yeah, we're cool."

Things return to normal for the rest of the evening with no more talks of boners, boyfriends, or hot bodies.

As I drift off to sleep, I feel strangely relieved that Jeff didn't hit it off with Kurt. I'm pretty sure that Kurt just isn't right for him but I'm don't know exactly what it is about him. Maybe the whole Blaine thing. Jeff really deserves so much better than someone who's just settling for him.

I dream that we're in the common room surrounded by the Warblers but Jeff and I are naked, wrestling on the floor. Kurt is there dressed like the sassy gay friend. He flips his scarf and says to me "What, what, what are you doing, you stupid bitch!" Wes bangs his gavel saying, "I will have order, Nick!". The Warblers are gone and Jeff and I are in the shower which doesn't seem strange at all because in dreams nothing seems strange until you wake up. He's jerking me off and it feels great. "Are you sure you're OK with this?" he asks.

"Nick? Nick? Wake up."

I open my eyes and Jeff is standing by my bed dressed in his uniform, hair looking perfect which can only mean...

"Oh shit! I overslept! Why didn't you wake me up?"

"I just did."

"Earlier, why didn't you wake me up earlier?"

"Because the sound of me taking my shower usually wakes you up."

I rub my eyes trying to shake myself awake. Wow, that was a weird dream. It seemed kind of profound at first but now I realize that it was just a silly amalgam of junk percolating in my sub conscience.

"Go on to breakfast, I'll catch up with you in a little bit. Days like this, it's great that we wear uniforms. I won't be long."

When he's gone I stumble out of bed and shuffle to the bathroom. It's cold so someone must have turned off the heat in the middle of the night or maybe that's broken too now. I look in the mirror and determine that I look like hell. I don't think I got enough sleep last night. My first judgement that I'd be ready in a few minutes was a poorly thought out half asleep comment because I really need a shower. I usually shower at night but Jeff and I stayed up late playing one of my favorite games - 'worst movie of all time'. It isn't really a game more like a running argument. Jeff always wants to put the latest terrible movie on top (2012 being one we'd just seen) while I always return to the classics (Johnny Mnemonic will be hard to dethrone in my book). Anyway, it is really just an excuse to compare bad movies to each other and once we get started it's kind of hard to stop.

I get in the shower and look down at the huge boner I woke up with. I'd hoped it go away on it's own like a morning boner is supposed to because I just don't have time for this. I'm going to have to rub one out in the shower and make it quick. I wash my hair fast and soap up my body as I start to seriously clear the sleep from my brain.

I start stroking my dick with my soapy hand, determined to get it over with. I think about Megan Fox because she's seriously hot and hopefully she can speed this up for me. The trouble is as soon as I think about Ms. Fox, I can't help but think of Transformers which reminds me that Michael Bay is such a hack and Transformers 2 was a serious contender on my all time worst movies ever list. You might as well call the whole series 'stuff blows up a lot'. But we have to see those movies because Jeff loves them. Something about the explosions and and giant robots and he's hooked. Jeff gets so enthusiastic sometimes and it's infectious when he smiles. I'd do just about anything to see him smile but luckily it's easy because he smiles all the time. It just lights up the room when he does. He has that kind of smile that so genuine - you can tell because it go all the way to his beautiful brown eyes.

Damn. Jeff is waiting from me down in the dining room and I am standing here with my dick in my hand like an idiot. I speed up and focus on reaching my climax. It's just seconds away if I stay focused. It finally hits me and I sigh with relief as the water washes away my cum as fast as it spurts out. I'm shaky as I rinse off but I think I can still get dressed and out of here in time to enjoy a cup of coffee with my best friend before class.

My whole world turns upside down in an instant. I sink to the bottom of the shower and just let the water wash over me as I sit there stunned. This would be a good time for a vertigo zoom except the white tiles would make that useless. Maybe a nice dramatic cut from a full shot to an extreme close up. Yeah, I'm so geeky that I'm imagining how to film it when I'm having the biggest fucking revelation in my life. Fuck. I'm so screwed. I'm in love with Jeff. My best friend Jeff. Who is gay. Who is a gay guy. How the hell did that happen? When did it happen? I just jerked off thinking about him. _Him. _What does that mean?

Somehow I manage to get out, dry, and in my uniform in this shell shocked state. I sit on the edge of my bed trying to think it through because I'm so confused. There's no making it to breakfast now. I can't face Jeff; I need a plan first. I take a deep breath, take out a pen and a notebook and start some lists. I know it seems lame but it helps me think. In one column I write the heading "Things that are true" and next to that I write "Things that might be true" and finally I write "To do".

Under the first title I write the thing I'm most sure of "I'm in love with Jeff Stark." I don't hesitate at all. Under the next column I write "Jeff is in love with me" because I'm not at all sure of that. I think he is but what if I'm reading all the signs wrong? Just because he got a boner when I was lying on top of him doesn't mean he's in love with me. I know he loves me but maybe just as a friend. I get inappropriate boners in math class; it doesn't mean I'm in love with math. In the final column, I write "find out if Jeff is in love with me".

It is a good start but I don't have my priorities straight yet. In the first column, I write "I'm sexually attracted to women" because there is no doubt about that. I'm at a loss as to what to write next because what does it mean? If I'm not gay, how can we be together? I think for a while before I write in the next column "I'm bisexual". Then in the last column I write "Investigate bisexuality" then I cross it out and write "figure out if I'm bisexual" and underline "I'm" three times.

I pretty sure that I've written down all I know and everything is else in my head is a mass of confusion and questions. I skip the first column and write "I'm sexually attracted to Jeff" in the second column. In the last column, I write "Can we be together?" because I'm tired of writing "figure out if" in front of all my to dos. Apparently, that's all I can do for now is figure out stuff.

I can't just throw my arms around Jeff and confess my love for him. I'm not afraid that he'll reject me, even though he might. I really don't see why someone as great as he is would go for me but I don't care about getting my heart broken. What if he's in love with me and I freak out the first time we kiss? What if I get his hopes up and it turns out I can't deliver? I can't do that to him. I can't experiment with his affection to figure out my own sexuality. I write a "#1" by by my "Can we be together" entry because that's the first thing I have to figure out. Is this even possible? You'd think it would be 'do I want this?' but I don't even have to ask that. So I go ahead and write "I want to be with Jeff" in the first column.

I close my eyes and try to picture it. The trouble is that I don't even know what _it_ is. What do I even mean by 'be with Jeff'? Have sex with him? I know gay guys have sex with each other - duh. Unfortunately, I'm woefully ignorant on exactly what that means. I'm not naive but I thought I was straight so I've never even thought about it before. So I should start simple and figure the rest out later. A kiss. I'll picture kissing him and see if that does anything for me. I can see Jeff's face clearly in my mind and I can hear his voice as he says, "Nick? What the heck is wrong with you?"

Oops. That wasn't in my head. I open my eyes and he's standing in front of me looking worried. I snap my notebook shut and exclaim, "Nothing. Sorry about breakfast. I didn't get enough sleep and I'm having trouble waking up."

He smiles. God he so adorable when he smiles.

"No worries. I brought you some coffee. Or rather coffee flavored cream and sugar - just the way you like it."

I take the cup he extends and say gratefully, "Oh god thank you so much. You're amazing. I love you!"

I've got to stop saying that! He doesn't seem to notice. He just laughs and says, "I love you too, man. Now get your bag and move. There's no excuse for being late to class when you literally live at the school! And I brought you a bagel. You can eat it on the way."

As we head out to our first class, world history, Jeff says, "You know the problem with history?"

"It's so over." I answer automatically. "And you know what else?"

"All those people are dead already," he replies.

We're practically like a married couple and I'm sure we get on everyone's nerves. We tell that joke to each other nearly everyday. I zone out as we're walking and try to think of a way to test my sexuality. Think about hot guys? Who's the sexiest man alive? Oh god, not Ryan Reynolds. How did he even get that title? Not sexy at all. Matthew McConaughey! Of course. I picture Matthew McConaughey running shirtless through the waves...Just not doing it for me.

Who else is sexy? Brad Pitt. Jeff loved "Legends of the Fall" which I did not understand at all. That movie was nothing but chick porn featuring Brad Pitt running around in slow motion. Now I get it. I should have known Jeff was gay from that movie alone. So I picture Brad Pitt a la Legends. Shirtless. Wind blown hair.

"Nick? What are you thinking about? You are not listening to me at all!"

"Uh, sorry. I was thinking about Brad Pitt," I answer without thinking. I catch my mistake quickly and amend, "Because I read online that there's going to be a sequel to "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" and that would be so awesome."

"Really? That would be awesome. Do you think it's true?"

I shrug nonchalantly. We take out seats in class just before the bell rings. I don't bother to pay attention to the teacher because everything that he covers is directly from our text book. He's the most boring teacher we have and if you don't mind reading, it's pretty easy. Jeff and I usually just sit and text each other instead of paying attention. Today, I spend the class trying to get a boner for a guy. It sounds pervy when I put it that way.

Tall, slim, blond...How about Alexander Skarsgård? He's naked all the time on TrueBlood and I know he's sexy. That scene where Sookie is dreaming that she was rolling around naked in bed with Erik...that is totally doing it for me. That scene was practically porn and thinking about it definitely turning me on ...Maybe...Stupid. I'm so stupid. Of course that scene was hot but that still isn't a test of whether I'm into guys.

This is going to be more difficult than I thought.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Language: English, **_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 4400+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 6**_

_**05 January, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

Nick is acting weird. I don't mean the kind of weird that I'm used to from Nick like how he can go on and on about the fact that Fringe is getting alternate universes all wrong even if dirigibles are totally awesome and everything about the red universe kicks ass. Or like the time he told Trent that Wes had a hidden stash of doll clothes and secretly dressed his gavel up late at night in his room. That was actually hilarious and Trent never once asked how Nick could possibly know that.

I don't even mean weird like when he gets a crazy new story idea and spends days at his computer typing a script for a three hundred million dollar movie, pausing every once in a while to exclaim "Oh my god that is frakin brilliant!" Or even the way he videos seemingly random stuff and claims it's epic.

I'm used to all of those things; I've been living with Nick now for two and a half years. Unfortunately, I think I know why he's acting so strange because of when it started. The Unfortunate Boner Incident as it's come to be known in my mind. He made me feel OK about it by turning it all into a joke and claiming it was his own fault. He had a point; he was lying on top of me half naked, all sexy and sweaty, and I'm in love with him. That might have been a factor. Yeah, it's true, I'm completely hopelessly in love with my best friend and I have been for a while.

I didn't tell Nick everything after the Halloween party. I admitted to being gay but that wasn't the whole truth. I didn't tell him that I was in love with him or that it never works out with dates because I compare them all to him. I didn't tell him the real reason I never came out to him either. I wasn't afraid that he wouldn't be my friend any more. I know Nick better than that. I'm actually surprised that he wasn't angrier at the implication that he might be homophobic. My motivation was much more selfish than that. As long as we didn't really talk about sexuality, I could hold on to the sliver of hope that Nick was gay too and that someday he would fall in love with me and we'd be together. It's like Schrödinger's cat. As long as I didn't open that box, I could hope for the outcome I wanted.

Unfortunately, his stupid girlfriend and her annoyingly heterosexual breasts and evil vagina ruined everything. I'm sure she is very nice but I hate her. I hate her for being Nick's first sexual experience and I hate her for making me give up my fantasies. He was right, I should have told him then - when he was going on about getting me a girlfriend. I should have just said, "I'm gay, Nick. Didn't you already know that?" as if it was no big deal. I told myself that I'd tell him after I had a boyfriend because a gay roommate with a boyfriend is less creepy. I never wanted him to imagine that I thought about him sexually. That I'm a total pervert. My brother was right about that.

My eighth grade year everything changed. Not just for me but all the kids. We were going through adolescence, of course, and everything was weird and awkward. It was the year my dick and my right hand became best friends. It was also when all the boys split into two groups - those who thought girls were suddenly very interesting and those who pretended they did because not being interested got you called gay. It was the year that I learned that the worst thing you could say about something was "That's so gay!" It was the year that I found out the difference between the cool kids and all the rest.

I was one of the cool kids. I played soccer and basketball, I was tall for my age, and my parents had money. I was best friends with the captain of the soccer team - we'd just sort of fallen in together since the beginning of middle school. So everything was perfect for me, right? Except it wasn't. It was all a lie; I knew there was something wrong with me. I knew it and I did the only thing I could think of; I went to my big brother because I looked up to him.

"Hey little bro. What's up?" he said when I came into his bedroom that evening.

My face felt hot and I couldn't even look at him but I mumbled, "Can I talk to you about personal stuff?"

"Sure," he said in a reassuring voice. "No problem, little bro. It's OK if you want to talk about embarrassing stuff that's going on with your body. Ask me anything you want; I've been through it and I'm a fount of wisdom. Just don't ask me to show you how to...you know because that would be weird." He said the last making a jerking off motion with his hand and I feel like sinking through the floor.

"I know how," I admitted.

"Good, that's a relief. You aren't worried about how often you do it, are you? There's nothing to feel guilty about. Just do it as often as you want. In fact, here's my advice. The more you take care of business, the less often you get those embarrassing problems that pop up in class and when you're trying to talk to a girl. They hate that. Just use lots of lotion - you do _not_ want dick burn. I'm just saying."

I finally worked up the courage to interrupt with, "What do you think about...you know while you are..."

"Oh, you're looking for inspirational material? Here," he reached in his nightstand and pulled out a copy of Vogue. I must have looked completely puzzled because he laughed. "I know, you thought Playboy or something like that. Seriously, these are better. The pictures are practically pornographic and you don't have to hide them from Mom. If any one wonders why you'd have a woman's magazine, just say you are trying to understand girls. Just stick to supermodels and actresses and you'll be fine. _Don't_ think about girls you actually know. I know you'll want to but I'm warning you that it gets weird if you do. You might want to ask her out and then you feel like a perv because you've totally been thinking about her doing kinky shit to you. Next thing you know, you've blown your chance with a really hot girl."

"What if I don't?"

"Don't what? Be specific, I can't read your mind."

"WhatifIdontthinkaboutgirls?" I rushed out.

"What else would you think about?"

"Boys. I think about boys." I finally admitted. When he didn't say anything, I kept going. "It's wrong isn't it? There's something wrong with me! It's gay and I know that's bad. Everyone says so. I just can't help it." Then I was in tears because I was scared now that brother knew I was some kind of sick pervert but I was still hoping that he could fix it. Fix me.

He moved closer to me, pulled me into a hug, and held me tight when he said, "Don't say that. Don't ever say that. There is nothing wrong with you. If you like boys then you like boys. That's fine and you're fine."

"But everyone says it's bad," I argued with my face pressed into his chest.

"They are wrong. I'm your brother and I know. Don't listen to them, just don't." He pulled away and said, "Look at me." I did. "What I'm going to tell you next is hard. There isn't anything wrong with you. But some people - a lot of people - believe there is. Those people could hurt you if they knew, so you shouldn't say anything about this. It's not fair but you can't go around telling boys that you like them or trying to kiss them. OK? It isn't safe. Just wait until you're older. Next year, you'll be going to Dalton. It's safe there and there are plenty of gay guys. You'll meet someone nice. Do you understand?"

"Yeah, don't go around kissing boys."

I said I understood but I wasn't able to follow his advice on not kissing any boys. He was right about there being consequences too, but not exactly the way he'd thought when he warned me. I didn't pay the price. I'd told Nick about the first (and only) time I'd kissed a girl but I didn't tell him the rest of the story. After I kissed Beth, we kept playing, of course. When it was my turn to spin, the bottle landed on a boy, Evan. I'd noticed him before and I really liked him. He was shy but handsome, or at least I thought so. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to kiss a boy in the game but soon enough the other kids started laughing and shouting "You have to kiss him! It's the rule. You have no choice. Do it. Do it. Do it."

I didn't know the unspoken rule was that you give the boy a quick peck then draw back and wipe your lips in disgust. I didn't know so I gave him the same treatment that I'd given Beth. At first, I pressed my lips to his firmly, then slowly parted them as I tilted my head. He responded in kind and before I could even think better of it, my tongue was in his mouth and we were making out. Suddenly, he tensed up and pushed me away spewing a stream of protests. I don't remember what he said but he made it clear he thought I'd basically attacked him. The rest of the kids watched in shocked silence.

What I said next changed his life. I didn't choose my words for effect. I didn't plan to deflect blame from me; I just blurted out the next words on instinct in a attempt to defuse the situation.

"Chilax, dude, it's just a game."

That was it. Everyone laughed and I was the cool laid back guy, confident enough to make out with anyone for the sake of the game. And the other boy? He'd protested too much, hadn't he? He'd made a huge deal about it being my fault even though everyone had seen how much he'd participated in the kiss. From that moment on, he was the gay kid and he suffered for it. It wasn't as bad as what happened to Blaine or Kurt but still he was teased and shunned. He paid the price for my mistake and I'll never forget that. I know that I was just a kid and I never meant any harm. I didn't participate in any of the bullying at my school but I'm not proud of that - after all I should have done more than not participate. The next year, I came to Dalton and my life changed again.

So here I am, sitting on my bed, pretending to study while strolling down memory lane, trying to figure out what has gotten into Nick lately. I glance over to him on his bed reading his literature assignment. He absentmindedly chews on the end of a pen - a habit he denies but the teeth marks on all of his pens don't lie. Now and then he pauses his reading and jots down a note in his notebook. That's not unusual. He isn't doing anything unusual right this moment.

Before Christmas break, he seemed distracted, distant, and I had this constant impression that he was thinking of something entirely different from what we were talking about. I thought he was just stressing over the break. He didn't want to go to California to spend the break with his mother so I chalked up his behavior to his unhappiness about that situation. At the last minute, his mother sent him a ticket to Vermont instead and Nick was over the moon. During the break, we Skyped and sent each other messages every day. He was so excited about his time with his dad and sister. We showed each other our presents on Christmas morning. His mom had bought him a new laptop and his dad gave him a new top of the line video camera. He laughed and told me there were advantages to guilty divorced parents. Nick never lacked for all the fancy gadgets he could want.

Everything was so normal in our conversations over the break that I was surprised by his behavior when he got back. It's hard to explain really. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was trying to seduce me. I know that's just a figment of my deviant brain. Nevertheless, there is something going on.

I broke the other rule my brother gave me too. I try not to but it's impossible not to fantasize about being with Nick. I try to picture Ian Somerhalder, Thomas Dekker, Matt Bomer, Tom Welling, or Matt Dallas. Basically every hot guy I've seen on TV but the trouble is that they remind me of Nick. I have to stop thinking about him but it's just so difficult when he's so affectionate, so free with his hugs and touches. I know for him they are completely innocent but for me they are like an exquisite torture.

It's even worse when we share a bed like we did over the Thanksgiving holiday. When I fell asleep, we weren't touching but he was so close that I could feel Nick's body heat and it's no wonder that I dreamt of him. I dreamt we were kissing and more. The more was a vague love making that felt fantastic. He was in my arms, touching every part of my body, and I felt a climax coiling in my groin as I woke to fuzzy reality. Reality, where I was holding Nick and humping his ass like a subway sex offender. A very asleep Nick. I stopped moving in time and slowly disentangled myself from him, desperately hoping he wouldn't wake up before I made my escape. As I got out of bed, my heart nearly stopped when he rolled over with a whine but he clutched my pillow and settled back down. I snatched my clothes and ran for the bathroom down the hall.

I leaned against the door and looked down at my offending member tenting shamelessly in my pajama pants. I should have taken a cold shower but I didn't. I'd been so close before I woke up that it only took a few strokes to finish but the wave of guilt hit me nearly before the wave of pleasure faded. I cleaned up quickly then spent far longer than I needed fixing my hair. No one cared if I had bedhead on Thanksgiving morning for breakfast but I wasn't ready to face anyone yet. I stared in the mirror and said, "I was asleep. It wasn't my fault. I'm not a pervert," but I didn't believe it. Nick loves me and I repay his trust and kindness with dirty thoughts and apparently, that morning at least, deviant sex acts.

I headed down to breakfast where my mom was already mixing some waffle batter and heating up some maple syrup. I love that part, the anticipation, the smell of breakfast in our homey kitchen. My spirits were lifted and my earlier shame forgotten or at least pushed aside. Then Nick walked in, looking like he literally rolled out of bed and came straight to breakfast. I smiled at him because Nick rumpled with mussed hair is just adorable. He smiled back and sat next to me.

My mom gave him the first waffle as she always does. Then, he did that thing he does and I wonder if he even realizes that he does it. He cut his waffle in half and put half on my plate before starting on his. Maggie protested this outrage like she hadn't seen it a hundred times before and I stuck my tongue out at her.

"Thanks, Nick," I said with a smile. I felt so warm inside that I guess my eyes lingered a little too long on his face. He looked back at me and smiled.

Then my stupid brother said, "Geez, get a room already, you two!"

I gave him a glare and Maggie snickered but it didn't ruin my good mood.

After everyone else got their waffles, my mom put one on a plate in front of us as if she didn't know who to give it to, like she always does. I cut it in half and stabbed the left side with my fork at the same time Nick snagged the right half. Our eyed locked for a second and we just grinned as if to say perfect timing again! Have I mentioned that I love Nick? There are so many moments just like that every single day. Moments that probably seem silly or meaningless to anyone else but they're the reason I'm happy, those moments. I don't really mind that we can't have the rest because we have those.

After breakfast, we had the annual Thanksgiving dinner prep but it was different because Nick joined us. Mom gave him the task of chopping the vegetables that go into the stuffing. I had to show him to chop without putting his fingers in danger. I stood next to him and put my hand on the onion, fingers curled back, and chop a few chops to demonstrate.

"See, it's easy. This way you won't lose a finger. I hate when there are body parts in the stuffing!"

"Thanks. I'm not much of a cook. Other than sugar cookies, I've never really learned to make anything."

My job was tear up the bread and mix all the dry ingredients for the stuffing. I love the smell of sage, thyme, and savory. It smells like home and family. My sister always puts the pies together, while dad prepares the sweet potatoes. Soon the kitchen smelled of cinnamon and vanilla as well. We all have the same tasks every year but with one extra pair of hands, my mom let my brother make the green bean casserole which she usually makes. That left her waiting for the vegetables that Nick was chopping but he was done soon enough and the kitchen was filled with the smell of sautéing onions.

I smile at the memory because I always love Thanksgiving but this past year it was brand new through Nick's eyes. Apparently, his step-mom buys everything in a package deal at the grocery and heats it all up in the microwave a few minutes before dinner. He had no idea that stuffing had ingredients!

That night, when we were lying in bed talking late into the night, it didn't feel dirty or perverted that I wanted to hold his hand, and plant sweet kisses on his lips. It felt right and even though I didn't, I went to sleep thinking that maybe I could have.

"It's movie night; are we going?" asked Nick startling me back to reality.

"What's playing?"

"Inception. It just came out on Blue-ray."

"OK, sure. Maybe it will make sense this time."

"It made perfect sense. It's amazing how internally consistent that movie was. The structure was perfect with all the rules laid out for you if you just pay attention."

"Maybe I don't like to pay attention when I'm watching a movie. Maybe I just want to be entertained." I say that just to get a rise out of him but he just sighs.

Movie night is an informal tradition we have in the dorm. There is a huge flatscreen TV in the best rec room (Dalton has several) with a Blue-ray player. Dave is in charge of entertainment and arranges movie nights with the latest movies out on Blue-ray. Most of the time, Nick and I have already seen the movies but we go anyway.

When we arrive, the first thing I realize is that we should have come sooner. Turn out is higher than usual and it looks like we might have to sprawl out on the floor. I look at Nick to see if he is still game and he shrugs.

"I'll go find us something comfortable," he says before he dashes off. Several of the boys have already dragged chairs from the other rec rooms. Some of them have brought pillows from their room to get comfortable. I wander around saying hi to guys I know from Warblers, classes, and the basketball team while waiting for Nick.

Nick comes back dragging the biggest bean bag chair I've every seen and positions it in a good location on the floor in front the the couch.

"What do you think?" he asks hopefully.

"Did you take the Tardis back to the sixties to find that?" I snarked. "Or is there a secret commune hidden in the bowels of Dalton somewhere?"

"It's not that bad," he insists. "Grab some popcorn and get comfortable." Nick throws himself down on the bean bag with a laugh.

I snag some popcorn from the popcorn machine and lie down in front of him, squirming around a bit to get comfortable. There is no way I'm going to be behind him all night. Lying this close to him is going to be torture enough. As soon as I get settled, he plasters himself to my back and reaches over me for the popcorn. It's going to be a long night.

He cuddles against me the entire movie and by the time the lights come back up, I feel like I'm on fire. My skin is tingling from the way he keeps casually brushing his hand against my arm and I'm ready to scream in frustration. Why does my best friend have to be such a cuddle whore? He seems oblivious to all of this as we head down to our room.

"Were you listening?" he asks.

"Yeah," I answer distractedly.

"What did I just say?"

"Um...pay attention to who's awake at each level and you'll understand the ending?"

"Exactly!'

"I still don't get it. Was he dreaming or not?"

"No, that was my point. The rules were clearly laid out even if unstated! He was definitely not dreaming."

"If you say so. Then why didn't they just show the damn top fall over?"

We walk into our room and Nick heads straight to the bathroom calling, "I'm going to hit the shower if that's OK."

"Sure, yeah, we should get to bed soon," I agree. Nick likes to shower at night while I like to shower in the morning. I guess that's a good thing. That way neither of us is waiting on the other in the morning. Not that there's any hurry in the mornings. Living at school means you can sleep in, have a leisurely breakfast, and still make class in plenty of time.

Nick comes out of the bathroom and the first thing I notice is that he's wearing nothing but a towel. A towel draped low slung, barely clinging to his hip bones. Then I focus on that dark patch of hair that starts just above his belly button and trails down, disappearing... _Fuck don't stare at his crotch like a deviant._ I look up at his face and notice his hair is still wet and there is a drop of water running down his neck and chest and I just want to lick it off..._Stop thinking dirty thoughts._

Of course, I've seen Nick nearly naked so many times. We've lived together for more than two years. The heat at Dalton is notoriously fickle and half the time we wear just pajama pants, shorts, or even just boxers because it gets so hot. But there's just something so sexy about the way he is draped in that towel. He usually comes out in his pajamas or at least the pants.

He's on my bed leaning toward me saying, "Whatcha doing?"

"Playing...umm...Penguins...Crazy Penguin Catapult," I stammer.

"Looks like fun."

"Yeah, it is."

Suddenly, he's all over me and all I can think is _oh my god is this happening is he going to kiss me? _But no, he reaches over me to the clock on my nightstand and turns it in our direction.

"It's getting late, should I hit the lights? Or do you want to play a while?"

_Fuck yes I want to play_ I almost blurt out but my brain freezes my mouth before it says anything that stupid and I just kind of grunt, I think. When I finally regain the ability to think rationally (almost), I push him a little with my elbow and snap, "Just get off me and let me play for ten minutes, alright?" He looks crushed by my sharp tone.

"Yeah, of course, sorry, I didn't mean to bother you," he says getting up. "I'll just go put my pajamas on; I forgot to grab them before my shower." He pulls his PJs out of a drawer and heads back to the bathroom.

"No, I'm sorry, Nick, I'm just..." _horny and you aren't helping matters_ "tired, I'm sorry I snapped at you. You weren't bothering me at all. I'll hit the lights and try to go to sleep." I put away my iPad, turn out the over head lights, and leave the lamp between the bed on for Nick. I sink under my covers, close my eyes, and try to sleep but my mind is racing. I don't understand what's happening with Nick. _Is it all my imagination?_

I hear him slip into his bed and turn off the lamp. I lie listening to him breathe for a long while before sleep finally claims me.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 2600+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 7**_

_**06 January, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

Maybe I imagined the whole thing. Or at least whatever strange thing that's been going on with Nick seems to be gone today. He was dressed and ready to go by the time I was out of my shower this morning; breakfast was so achingly normal that I seriously began to doubt my own sanity for thinking Nick was acting weird.

We bemoan the fact that all of our favorite shows are on hiatus and there is absolutely nothing exciting coming to theaters for months.

"Green Hornet might be good," I comment.

"I don't know. The trailers seem a little muddy."

"Muddy?"

"Yeah, like they don't know if they are making action movie or a comedy. I can't tell what they're going for."

"Seth Rogen," I counter throwing my hands up in the air.

"Yeah," he agrees, "that does say it all, doesn't it?"

"We are going to go see it, aren't we?"

"DUH! Of course, we're going to go see it," he laughs. "How could we not?"

At lunch we talk about song possibilities for the Warblers.

"How do you feel about Destiny's Child, Blaine?" asks Thad.

"It has some possibilities," he replies noncommittally.

"Just no more Katy Perry," jokes Dave.

"Don't be hating on Katy," Blaine replies playfully.

"I think we should try some Maroon 5," Nick suggests. "What about Misery?"

"Why don't we ever do Broadway musical tunes?" Kurt interjects.

"Kurt, I know it suits you voice, but Broadway musicals are nearly impossible to arrange in eight part harmony," explains Wes. "It's all about the acapella group sound. None of your suggestions are workable."

"Wes, Dave, Thad, you know what I've always wanted to do?" asks Blaine. "A big eighties rock number. What do you think? Can I do one?"

Dave sighs with exasperation, "No. No, we're are not doing a big eighties rock number."

xXx

We're walking to our first class after lunch when out of the blue Nick says, "Did you know that Derrick is gay? No only that, I think he is hot for you."

"Derrick? Who's Derrick?"

"You know, he's a senior in our chemistry class?"

I give him a puzzled look.

"Plays lacrosse? Come on, he has the front bench with Jon. They're lab partners."

"Oh, that guy. I've never really noticed him."

"Well, you should go feel him out."

"What kind of slut do you think I am?"

"Feel him out, not feel him up!" he objects. "Just give him a chance. You never know. You deserve to find someone special."

He has a look on his face that I know far too well. I don't understand it in this context but I see the emotions clearly written on his face. Sadness, regret, and pain. When I met Nick, he was so lonely and homesick. During our first year at Dalton, I got to know the face of his painful feelings. He cried in my arms more times than I can count begging me to tell him why. Why did his mother send him away? How could his family not love him? What was wrong with him?

I didn't have any answers; I was just a kid, too. But I was there for him. It was all I could do. I think I fell in love with him then. He puts on a brave face for everyone else, hides his pain with humor and sarcasm, but he never hid his tears from me. From the first day we met, he opened his heart to me and I loved him for it. He trusted me with his most painful thoughts and I did my best to be a friend he could count on.

So why is he sad now? I don't understand. He suggests I go out with a complete stranger and somehow that makes him sad? Is it because he wishes he had a girlfriend? I wish I could read his mind and find out what's really going on. It isn't like him to not talk to me about everything.

"Dude, you think about my love life far too much. Just give it a rest. I'm not looking for a boyfriend."

During chemistry, I check Derek out because I was being honest when I said I'd never noticed him. He is so not my type. He's tall, muscle bound, and doesn't even hold a candle to Nick. Have I mentioned that I love Nick? Yeah, maybe that's why other guys never seem interesting.

I sit next to Kurt during French. We speak French but Kurt keeps cracking up because my accent is lousy and apparently my verb tenses are hilariously inappropriate. About five minutes after the bell, Mr. Hunter still hasn't shown up and a few minutes later, Headmaster Miller comes in.

"I'm sorry to announce that Mr. Hunter had a sudden family emergency, so there is no French class today. Tomorrow, you'll have a substitute but for today, you may go."

The class erupts into cheers which earns a glare from the headmaster but we ignore him as we stream out. I head up to our dorm room thinking I'll just goof off playing some video games. I text Nick to let him know. When I walk into our room, I don't intend to start snooping but Nick left his laptop siting right on his bed. A voice in my head tells me not to do it, not to invade his privacy. But the thing is, he used surf the net and constantly say, "hey, Jeff you have got to see this!" But lately, he snaps the thing shut if I even look in his direction. What is he doing that he doesn't want me to know about?

I should just respect his privacy but if he's going through something and needs my help, I should know, right? Wrong. I know it's wrong but I boot it up, type in Nick's name then stare at the password box. What would his password be? Langston? No, he wouldn't be that stupid. Too easy to guess. I close my eyes and think. What would it be? I have it. I know what it has to be. All caps or not? Underscore? I decide, all caps, no underscore and type "NOFATE."

I'm in. Wow, it helps to know a guys favorite movie. I chuckle, because it's mine too. It's not too late, I could just log off and just ask Nick what the heck is going on with him. But I don't. I look at the email icon but decide, no. I'll check his browser history first.

gayforit; gaytube ; How do you know if you are bisexual; bisexual or bicurious; Are you gay, straight, or bisexual quiz...

I click the first link. _Ohmygod. Cocks. Asses. Porn. Lots of naked men. Naked naked men doing ... __**things**__ to other men. Gay porn. _I shut the lap top and try to breath. Why would Nick be looking at gay porn? _I've_ never even seen it. They always ask you if you are eighteen and I chicken out. I open it back up and try to focus on something other than the naked pictures on the screen. I see that there is a favorites menu so I click on it. It gets weirder. Not only has Nick been looking at gay porn, he has favorites.

I should stop right now. I click on the first favorite. Two fully clothed, tall blond young men are laughing and kissing. They say something but then I realize the sound is muted. I unmute it and they are speaking German so I don't understand them. It probably doesn't matter because it's porn. I can't believe I'm watching porn! They get undressed all the while kissing and talking in German. Oh my god, this is so hot. It's one thing to fantasize about stuff like this but I'm actually watching one guy blow another guy. Right in front of me. Then they...no way...that is not going to fit in...Oh fuck.

I know about anal sex, theoretically, but seeing two guys actually do it...I'm a little overwhelmed. It's almost surreal. As I watch one guy put his dick into the other guy's ass, I can't help but wonder if there is some kind of CGI involved because it just doesn't seem like it's possible. At the same time, it is so hot.

OK, now I'm completely turned on and I've seen my first porn video. I can't believe I just watched that. Nick watched this. Why? I can't think, so I click on the next favorite. Two young guys who don't really look old enough to be watching porn much less doing it. They are fully clothed but they don't waste any time changing that. I expect cheesy dialog and some pretense of a story but it's more like two hot guys hanging out and saying 'hey let's have sex now.' One guy teases the other about the color of his underwear. They argue for awhile about the color, one claims orange and the other claims, peach. That guy was totally wearing peach colored underwear and it strikes me as hilarious. I don't stop at that one, I watch one more on Nick's favorites list. This one only has blow jobs but again, the boys are tall, blond, and young.

I close the window and try to clear my head. The raging hard-on I have is not helping me think at all. Nick is gay. Oh my god, Nick is _gay_ and he's only just figured it out. It's the only explanation for his sudden change in behavior. Is he into me? Why did he try to get me to go out with another guy? I just can't think.

My phone beeps and I nearly jump out of my skin. It's Nick.

_**Hey lazy, I'm on my way up. - N**_

Oh, no. I log out and shut the computer down. Where was it when I came in? I put it on his bed and hope he doesn't notice anything. What now? I need to get rid of this this boner so I run into the bathroom. I don't have time for anything so I turn on the shower. I scream as the icy water hits me but at least I'm not hard now. I get out shivering and barely pull on some sweat pants before Nick walks in the door.

"Hey, I heard about Mr. Hunter. What do you suppose happened to him?"

"What?" I ask stupidly because I have not idea who Mr. Hunter is. Nick is fucking gay. How did I not know this? Why hasn't he told me? That's not fair, I didn't tell him about me until I had to. But it's different. Since he knows I am, why not tell me? How long has he known? Is it possible to be seventeen and not know you're gay? I figured it out when I was thirteen but was Nick so far in the closet that he didn't even know himself? I know some men get married, have kids, and don't come out until later in life but I always assumed that they knew they were gay.

"French class. I heard about how you got to skip French because Mr. Hunter didn't show up. What do you suppose happened?"

"Oh, French class. Yeah, that happened. I have no idea why."

"What do you want to do tonight?" _Pin you down on the bed and ravish you._

"I don't care. Whatever."

"I'm sick of cafeteria food, do you want to go out?"

"Sure that sounds great."

We go for pizza, which honestly is about all there is in Westerville. I don't say much during dinner or the rest of the evening. I try to do my homework but I keep coming back Nick and what does it mean. I circle my thoughts back to last night. The look of disappointment, the sadness today, the suggestion that I date some random jock...Nick, you idiot. Why didn't you just kiss me? I think I understand, he thinks that I don't want him. He _was_ trying to seduce me and I was too oblivious to see it. He was being way to subtle and now he thinks that I rejected him.

I put on my pajama pants while Nick is in the shower. I debate putting on a shirt but decide shirtless is better. I don't usually wear a shirt to bed anyway. I turn out the over head light and pace in the dim glow of the lamp. What if I'm wrong? He'll forgive me, I assure myself.

Nick pads out of the bathroom dressed in an oversized t-shirt and draw string pants.

"I'm just going to go ahead and sack out if you don't mind. It's kind of been a long day," Nick says when he sees me standing here waiting for him.

"I do mind," I say quickly and before he can register that cryptic remark, I kiss him. He whimpers softly and leans into me like he's been waiting for this kiss his whole life. Oh god, he isn't pushing me away. I wrap my arms around him, pulling him closer. He puts his arms around my neck and practically clings to me. I deepen the kiss, and he responds enthusiastically, sucking on my lower lip. I groan into his mouth and start walking him backwards. Our lips finally part when he tumbles back onto the bed. I follow not very gracefully and I'm lying on top of him, looking into his eyes. He's grinning like an idiot but I'm sure I am too.

"I love you so much, please tell me you love me too," I beg.

He laughs almost hysterically at first and then says, "You know I do. I tell you nearly every day."

I lean in so that I'm practically breathing into his mouth. "Please tell me that you're in love with me."

"I'm in love with you, Jeff Stark," he answers immediately.

"How long?"

"I figured it out just before Christmas break."

"Why didn't you..."

"Just shut up and kiss me," he says pulling me down into another desperate kiss. We kiss until our lips are swollen and we are dizzy from forgetting to breathe. I take off his shirt and explore his chest with my hands. His hands are all over me, stroking my back, petting my chest, occasionally reaching up to cup my face as our kisses become sweet and slow. It seems likes hours of kissing and touching with no words, just sighs, gasps, and moans when he says quietly, "We should sleep. We have class tomorrow."

I groan in protest but I let him go. I expect him to leave me and get into his own bed but instead, he rolls over, switches off the lamp, then snuggles back into me.

"Goodnight, Jeff. I love you."

"I love you, too."

"You don't mind if I sleep with you, do you?"

"Not at all," I reply softly. I actually do mind a little because I'm painfully hard from making out for what seems like hours. Nick didn't make a move to take things below the belt and since we just had our first kiss, it seems crude of me to ask my boyfriend for a handjob. It's not like I can excuse myself to take care of it - he'd know exactly what I was doing.

I sigh and hug him close because it's worth it. What's a slight case of blue balls compared to having my boyfriend in my arms?

"Nick?"

"Yeah," he mumbles sleepily.

"Are you my boyfriend?"

"If that's what you want to call us."

"What do you want to call us?"

"Boyfriends."

"Good."

"Sleep now. Tired."


	8. Chapter 8

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 4100 +**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 8**_

_**07 January, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

I wake up holding Nick in my arms and I realize it wasn't a dream. I can nuzzle his neck and kiss him softly on his forehead because he's my boyfriend now. We're boyfriends and we're in love. This is the best day of my life but I know it's only going to get better from here. I may be a little giddy from it all but I just can't help it. Nick is my boyfriend. We kissed. We slept together. OK, admittedly, we've slept together many times but this time we snuggled and I didn't have to hide my feelings with a careful space between us.

I reluctantly slip out of the bed taking one last look at my adorable sleeping boyfriend before padding to the bathroom to get ready for school. I step into the shower, my arms already missing him, and I know I'm being stupidly sappy but I can't help it. I've been in love with Nick for so long and I never really believed this would happen.

I'm rinsing the shampoo out of my hair when I hear the door. I open my eyes and he's standing in front of me. Naked. In the shower with me. I gasp in surprise and just stare. I've seen plenty of naked guys before in the locker rooms but I've never seen Nick like this. It's strange, we've lived together for two and half years and I'm not really shy about my body but I've never been naked in front of him before either.

I'm not sure how long we stare at each other before he steps forward, wraps his arms around me, and kisses me. We're standing under the hot spray together; I can taste the water as it runs into mouths mixing with the taste of Nick as his tongue invades my mouth. It's like he is trying to explore every hidden inch with his tongue as he grinds against me with his hard cock. His hands run along my back, slick with water and soap.

I moan and my hips snap forward when his hands squeeze my ass.

I gasp for breathe and say, "Are we going too fast? Should we be doing this?"

"I want this. I want you," he replies, a voice like sandpaper, erasing my objections.

He maneuvers me against the wall, leans his head against my chest, and takes my aching, needy dick in his hand. His touch is light, exploratory, and I whine in frustration. He runs his thumb along the slit and I thrust into his hand shamelessly. I'm too far gone to care.

"Please, oh god, please, Nick, I need...please I just need to," I beg. He cups my face with his free hand and brings me down for a slow kiss. He parts his lips and sucks my tongue into his mouth. At the same time he finally wraps his fist firmly around my erection and works me over with a steady rhythm that ends with the most amazing twist with each upstroke.

He's moaning in my mouth as he thrusts against my leg with the same rhythm he's using on me and I can't take much more of this. My vision completely blacks out as the dizzying waves of pleasure wash over me. I barely register Nick moaning my name when he comes as I'm winding down. His hand is still on me milking every drop out of me when I tune back into my surroundings.

He's leaning against me, bonelessly, looking like he might slip to the floor any second.

"Hey," I say as I wrap my arms around him for support.

"Good morning," he replies as if we both hadn't just had spectacular climaxes.

I laugh because I just have to. He laughs too and then we are kissing again. We get back under the water to rinse off. We soap each other up and spend more time than needed to get clean because we get caught up in exploring each other. Nick seems to be unable to stop licking my chest, especially my nipples as I burst into another fit of laughter.

"Stop, it tickles. Stop doing that," I insist as I try to push him away.

"But you liked it last night," he teases.

"That was before," I explain. It did feel good when I was turned on but now it just tickles.

We tumble out of the shower after kissing until we are both overheated and breathless again. Somehow we manage to get dry and I start working on my hair. Nick sits on the counter just watching me with a goofy smile on his face.

"What are you looking at?"

"You."

"Why? You're making me self-conscious and I need to get my hair done."

"I've never seen you do your hair before. I had no idea you put so much effort into it. And product. Wow, that's a lot of product."

"Unlike you, I actually care about my hair. It take tremendous effort to make my hair look like I didn't do a thing to it. Unlike, Kurt who always looks perfectly coiffed, when you look at me, you only see my boyish good looks." I toss my head to demonstrate. "See, I was just born this way!"

Nick laughs and I slide close to him to run my fingers through his hair, which he literally just toweled dry and combed.

"Oh no, just because you're my boyfriend doesn't mean you get to start fixing me. My hair is just fine," he protests before I even say anything.

I kiss him and say, "It's not fine, it's perfect. I love everything about you just the way you are."

He sighs and caresses my face before insisting, "We need to get dressed."

We get into our uniforms but we kiss practically between each button and it's miraculous that we actually get our ties tied. We're in the honeymoon phase and I assume that it gets less disgustingly sappy eventually but I don't really want it to.

"We should just skip class and make out all day," I suggest as I sit on the edge of my bed.

Nick straddles me and wraps his arms around my neck. Oh god, Nick is in my lap and it is just too hot. We kiss and my dick totally forgets the session we just had in the shower and starts demanding attention.

"We can't," he objects. "Besides, it's Friday. We just have to get through the day and then we'll have the whole weekend."

I know he's right.

"Can we talk a little before we go?" I ask.

"About what?"

"Us. What this means. Why didn't you tell me? How long have you known?"

"Us? We're in love. What more do you need to know? It means we're together. I want to be with you and you want to be with me. Doesn't it make you happy? I'm so happy now that I know we can be together."

"Why didn't you tell me? You can tell me anything."

"I wasn't sure we could be together. I didn't want to mess things up if we couldn't. I love you so much Jeff, I never want to hurt you. I only figured out that I even wanted this a few weeks ago and I just wasn't sure that it was even possible. So I didn't say anything. It's not like I spent years..."

"Nick, you're right. I didn't tell you that I'm gay when I've known you for years. I shouldn't even ask why you didn't want to tell me. I guess we've both been blind to what was in front of us."

"I didn't mean it like that, Jeff. It doesn't bother me that you didn't tell me that you were gay. Even if you'd told me sooner, I don't know if I would have realized that I was in love with you before I did."

"What made you realize it?"

"I honestly don't know. It was an epiphany that just hit me." Nick disentangles himself from me and stands up. "Come on," he says taking my hand, "Let's go have some breakfast and face the rest of the world."

"By the end of the day, everyone will know that we're together."

"Should we really tell anyone?" he asks.

"Why not?"

"Well, we live together. You're sixteen, I'm seventeen..."

"I'll be seventeen next month," I remind him.

"I know, but we're both under eighteen and we live together. What if your parents, or the Dalton administration, would want to separate us? Would your parents let us sleep together if they knew? I don't want to lose being with you every night."

"I hadn't thought of that. So we keep it secret?"

"I think we should for now."

"OK"

I barely register the day as it goes by. It's full of secret glances and clandestine kisses. The first kiss we manage to steal in an empty study room just after breakfast. Instead of his usual jokes and running commentaries, Nick texts me "I love you" about a gazilllian times and I fear we're going to be one of those shmoopy couples that everyone makes fun of. Luckily no one knows but me and I forgive him for being so sentimental because apparently my hotness has melted his brain. During lunch, the conversations seem far away as Nick and I share knowing looks across the table.

xXx

"We should do our homework," Nick insists when I try to capture him for a kiss.

"What? It's Friday. We have all weekend to do our homework, silly." I hug him but he stiffens and pulls away.

"Maybe we should go out. We could go into Columbus for dinner and see a movie," he suggests nervously.

"Nick, what's wrong? Talk to me."

"Nothing's wrong. I just thought you'd want to get out."

"Have you changed your mind about us? Don't you want to be with me?" I ask even though I'm afraid of the answer. "It's OK, you can tell me. I'm your friend no matter what. Maybe we went too fast. Is that it?"

He hesitates and then says,"I don't know if I can do this."

I take his hands and say, "Just talk to me. Tell me what's going on. I spent too much time hiding how I felt about you and I don't want to do that anymore. We can talk about anything."

"I didn't know if we could be together until you kissed me. It felt so right, Jeff. It felt like we belonged together. And this morning it was so easy, I thought I could do anything. It felt so good being with you."

"And now?"

"I don't know. I'm scared. We have so much time and no where to be. All weekend to just...I don't know if I can give you what you want. What if you want me to do something that freaks me out? What if I'm not ready for...stuff?"

"Oh, dude. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am? We've only been together less than a day. I don't expect anything from you. I promise." I pull him to me and plant soft chaste kisses on his lips. "Don't be nervous. I'm new at this too and we'll take it slow." I don't really want to take it slow but it's what he needs and I love him.

"OK. I'm just a little tense. Sorry."

I untie his tie and slip off his jacket. He doesn't object as I unbutton his shirt and get him out of his pants.

"Just lie face down on the bed. I know what you need."

He looks even more nervous than he did before and doesn't move.

"Do you trust me?" I say kissing the palm of his hand.

"Yeah, I do."

"Then just lie down. It's going to be OK."

I strip down to my boxers, grab some lotion, and straddle him as I quirt a generous amount in my hands. He starts at the first feel of my hands on his back.

"Shhh, just try and relax," I murmur. "Let me take care of you." I can feel the tension start to fade as I work out knots in his back and neck. I press the heel of my palm into his muscles and push to roll out stubborn anxiety he's holding in his body. He makes contented sounds as I make progress. "How does that feel?" I ask.

"Mmm. Really good. Where'd you learn to do that?"

I roll him over on his back and answer, "Dalton has a masseuse for the basketball team. She taught me everything she knows."

"Apparently, you are a good student because that was amazing."

"I'm not done yet," I promise, as I message his hands one at a time which earns me a very appreciative moan. "In fact you seem to still have some tension here," I tease as I palm his growing erection. He gets harder as I rub him through his boxers.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing? I think you're just making it worse," he teases back.

"So I should stop?"

"You should kiss me," Nick replies tugging on my arms until I lean in and comply. We start softly but soon we're side by side, legs tangled together kissing hungrily. I love kissing Nick and he seems to share the sentiment.

I slip my finger under the waistband of his boxers and ask, "Is this OK?"

He nods and says, "Only if these come off too," as he starts to drag mine down.

When I touch him, he gasps, and moans, "Oh, yes. That's feels so good." I take my time exploring every inch of his cock, noting what makes him respond. I feel a little cheated that he already knows his way around my dick when this is my first time touching him. I notice that he likes me to change the rhythm often. Slow, then fast, long strokes followed by swiping my thumb along the slit.

We take our time, exchanging slow kisses, as we play with each other. Every now and then, Nick does something clever and I forget this is supposed to be mutual, my hand going slack on his cock.

He laughs, "You liked that didn't you?"

Eventually, we forget the exploration and we are thrusting into each other's hands frantically. Kisses forgotten as we pant into each other's mouths. He comes first with a cry, and the hot wet feel of his cum, and the sound he makes, are enough to send me into my own climax. We stare at each other for a few seconds then he kisses me softly, rolls out of bed, and heads to the bathroom. He returns with a warm wet washrag and starts washing me off.

"You don't have to do that," I object.

"I want to." He tosses the rag indiscriminately not bothering to look where it lands and snuggles against me. He hooks his leg over mine and puts his head on my chest. My boyfriend is a snuggler alright. We lie quietly as I stroke his hair and he absentmindedly runs his fingers along my chest, occasionally adding random soft kisses.

"What do you want to do now?" he says after a while.

"So snuggle time is over?"

"Yeah, we can't lie around naked snuggling all night. It's pretty early. You want to go watch a DVD? Or maybe play some COD?"

"Sure, COD is always fun."

xXx

It's only our second night together but Nick gets into bed with me as if he's never slept anywhere else. He hugs me tightly and asks, "Is it OK if I sleep here with you from now on?"

"More than OK. I love sleeping with you."

"Even in this tiny bed?"

"Especially in this tiny bed," I reply before kissing him. I cup his face and deepen the kiss because I just can't get enough of him.

"I love you," he says when we part.

"I love you, too." I lean in for another kiss but he's already turned to switch the lamp off. He presses his back against me and sighs as he takes my hand, pulls it to his chest and twines his fingers with mine.

"Goodnight."

I nuzzle his neck and whisper, "Goodnight," trying not to sound disappointed because I was hoping for a little action before we go to sleep. I know I'm being greedy but hey I'm a teenage boy.

_**24 January, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

Nick and I have been boyfriends for nearly three weeks now and our relationship really hasn't changed much. We're still best friends except with more kissing. We do all the same things we used to, talk about all the same topics but now we sleep together every night. Nick showers with me in the morning instead of at night like he used to. I suppose that's more environmentally friendly but there are other advantages.

In the evening after dinner, we usually just hang out doing our reading and homework, except my cuddle junky boyfriend wants to lie in my lap while he reads. That took some getting used to, unfortunately. When we were first working out our routine, I would let my hands wander and get a little too frisky eliciting admonishments from Nick.

"Homework, first. Sexy times later," he would say.

"That's not fair. You're all over me! How am I supposed to concentrate?"

"Do you want me to go study somewhere else?" he'd ask innocently.

"No," I would pout because as frustrating as it is I love having Nick touching me.

I don't know how many times we had that conversation but I think we're still in our honeymoon stage. We still have at least one sneaky make out session during the day in addition to getting each other off in the morning and at night. No one seems to notice that we arrive at lunch a little late most days. Or if they notice, no one says anything.

We don't really talk about our relationship or sex but Nick seems comfortable with where we are. I know he's a little nervous about sex for some reason so we haven't gone further than jerking each other off or humping each other until we come. Admittedly, it feels great and we haven't been together for very long so I shouldn't want more. I guess maybe I'm just a slut because I wanted to go all the way our first night together but I'm willing to wait for Nick to be ready. I don't care if it takes years because just holding him in my arms every night makes me happier than I ever thought I could be.

Exciting changes are happening in the Warblers as well. The council has put me in charge of choreography and we are practicing Bills!Bills!Bills!. Everyone takes their places and the Warblers start singing.

Nick interrupts, "No, this just isn't right."

"What do you mean?" asks Dave.

"Blaine is just standing there waiting for his cue. It's boring," explains Nick. Nick is filming our performance so we can review it later.

"Well, what do you suggest he do?" I ask.

Nick looks around the room for ideas then says to Blaine, "Go outside."

"Outside?"

"Yeah, just wait outside the door," Nick insists as he pushes Blaine through the entrance of the library and shuts the double doors. "Aaron, stand on that at side." He looks at the Warblers and continues, "Let's start from the top."

We sing the intro and just before he is supposed to start singing Aaron and Nick open the door and Blaine makes an entrance. He does know how to make and entrance, that's for sure, and Nick's cinemagraphic instincts are right on target. It looks great.

When Blaine gets to the point where he is supposed to 'drive' behind the couch, he gets carried away and actually jumps up on the couch instead. It's the craziest number The Warblers have ever done, and I worry that Dave doing a back flip might be a bit much but then Blaine goes off script again and jumps up on the coffee table. I can't imagine what the cleaning crew is going to think when they find footprints all over the furniture.

When we're done, it's obvious that there's no turning back because even Thad is grinning like an idiot and all the Warblers are hugging each other and clapping each other on the backs. Amidst all the excitement, I doubt anyone notices that Nick and I hug a little too enthusiastically and I slip him a discrete kiss on the neck during our embrace.

He whispers in my ear, "Our room now!"

I try to contain my enthusiasm but we practically run to our room laughing with excitement. As soon as we close the door, he is kissing me and at the same time frantically trying to get my tie off.

"Damn uniforms," he swears as he works on my buttons.

I catch his hands and tease, "What happened to homework first, sexy times later?"

"You were too sexy dancing; that's what happened. I want you now. Fuck homework," he growls.

"I'd rather fuck you," I moan as I undo his belt.

We make it to the bed, leaving a trail of clothes behind us, clutching each other, all the while keeping our lips locked as we tumble into a tangled heap.

"If I'd known my dancing turned you on so much, I'd have been giving you a strip tease every night."

He brushed my hair from my eyes and says softly, "You always turn me on." He says it with such wonder, like the fact surprises him.

He reaches between us but I stop his hand and smile, "Just lie back and let me take care of you." I kiss his chest, trail down his abs, and randomly give him little kitten licks along the way. I look up at him with what I hope is a seductive look. Judging by the lustful look I get back, I'd say yes. I lick my lips in anticipation because I've wanted to do this for so long. I settle between his legs and give his cock a single long lick from base to tip. I dip my tongue into the slit to collect the pre-cum and savor the taste. It isn't anything special, just a little salty, like tears but I love it because it makes Nick whimper with excitement.

"That's so sexy," he breaths. "Please don't stop," he begs.

"Oh, I'm not going to stop anytime soon," I smirk. I really don't know what I'm doing so I go mostly on instinct. Instinct and responses I get from Nick. I start just by licking him all over and judging Nick's encouragement he loves it.

"That's so sexy, so hot, feels so good," he keeps saying. When I start mouthing the tip, he tries to thrust upward to get deeper in my mouth but I put my hands on his hips to hold him still. I sink lower an inch at a time. He starts begging, "Please, Jeff, please, I need more, oh god that feels good..." I know what he wants and I'm not trying to be a tease, I just haven't ever done this before and I don't want to gag trying to take the whole length at once.

I get more confident as I go, tightening my lips around him, I start bobbing up and down quickly. I like the feel of him in my mouth, it's sexy and exciting, especially knowing how much he's enjoying it. I moan around his cock and start sucking which drives him insane. I have trouble holding him in place as I get serious by going all way down and sucking hard. I gag a little but I just keep sucking which helps relax my throat.

"Jeff, I'm going to come. You need to stop now. Oh, god, I'm going to..." I just keep sucking as he spurts into my mouth. I try to swallow without letting up but cum ends up all over my chin and on Nick. I pull off with a pop and swallow what I can. It tastes a little stronger than the pre-cum but not really bad.

I look up at Nick and he looks so completely wrecked that I have to laugh.


	9. Chapter 9

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 4500+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 9**_

_**14 February 2011, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

Jeff and I have been boyfriends for thirty-nine days and we are having our first fight. We never had a serious fight in the entire time we were friends before we became lovers but I guess it's normal for lovers to fight, right? The trouble is that Jeff is mad at me and I don't even know why.

"Jeff, baby, please come out and talk to me!" I yell as I bang on the bathroom door. "I can't apologize if I don't know what I did wrong."

"Don't call me baby," he huffs as he opens the door.

"What should I call you?" I ask reasonably but he doesn't answer. "Come on, dude. The sooner you tell me what to apologize for the sooner we can get to the makeup sex," I point out trying to be funny and sexy at the same time. It doesn't get the result I'd hoped for.

"Makeup sex? Since when do we have sex?" he snaps.

"Since January 7th. At least twice a day and more on weekends," I answer as if that had been a reasonable question. "I pretty sure you were there all ninety-three times. What would you call it?" I call it making love in my head but I know that sounds sappy, so I don't say that aloud.

"Fooling around, which is what you're doing with my heart," he answers.

"Jeff," I say seriously. "Just tell me what's bothering you," I beg him.

"That girl."

"What girl?" Now I'm completely lost.

"That Latina girl at Breadstix. You were totally checking her out. You were staring at her breasts!"

"Santana?"

"You admit it! You even know her name."

"Kurt told us her name at Sectionals. She sang Valerie and she was fairly memorable. Plus, she came over to our table and introduced herself while we were chatting with Sam about the comparative merits of Na'vi verses Klingon. By the way, if we are accusing each other of checking out other people, you were totally checking out Sam's ass! And flirting with him, too. You laughed at every one of his stupid impressions! "

"I wasn't flirting and even if I was, that's different."

"How is it different?"

"Because you were checking out a girl!"

"What does that have to do with anything? Oh god, Jeff, I don't even care. I don't want to fight with you. I'm sorry that I checked out Santana's tits. I really don't remember doing it and if I did, it was totally subconsciously but I'm sorry anyway. I didn't know you were so jealous. I'll be more careful if you're going to be that kind of boyfriend."

"What kind of boyfriend? The kind who doesn't like to be lied to? You're not even denying it!"

"I thought you wanted me to admit it; now you want me to deny it? Jeff, I don't understand what you want from me. Just tell me what you want me to say and I'll say it. I don't know what you think I lied to you about because you won't tell me!"

"You lied to me about being gay! You aren't. You just admitted it. How could you do this to me? This whole time, this has just been an experiment. Fooling around until you could get a girlfriend. I thought I was your boyfriend but I'm just your fuck buddy. A high school dalliance that you can reminisce about with your wife living in your white picket fenced suburban house with 2.5 kids and a fucking dog!"

"What the fuck, Jeff? I never said I was gay. Why would you even think that? Why would you even care? I'm with you. You _are_ my boyfriend. I love you and who is this wife you think I'm going to have 2.5 kids with? Jeff, what are you talking about?"

Jeff walks to the closet and pulls out his overnight bag and heads to the door. Oh my god, he can't be serious. How is this happening?

"I'm talking about how you just been using me to get your rocks off. You're just a horny straight guy who decided to take a walk on the gay side for kicks. I thought you were my friend. My _best_ friend. How could you hurt me like this? How could you make me think that you were in love with me?"

"I'm not straight. I'm bisexual, I thought you knew that. I'm sorry if you didn't realize that but I didn't think it had to be said; after all, I did tell you about my girlfriend. I _am_ in love with you, Jeff. Just stop and think about it. Please, don't go - it's too late to drive all the way home tonight. Please stay and talk to me. I don't understand where any of this is coming from."

"In love with me? You just love the way I suck your cock!"

"Of course I do; you're awesome at it!" That last statement might have been the truth but yelling it at the back of Jeff's head as he slammed the door might have been a bad idea.

I don't go after him. Instead I collapse on the bed and start crying. I don't understand what's happening. Did my boyfriend just breakup with me because I'm bisexual? Why would that even matter to him? Fooling around? Just getting my rocks off? None of it makes any sense to me. How could Jeff, the boy I love so much, my soul mate, think that of me? He didn't mean it. He couldn't mean it.

When I first realized that I was in love with Jeff, I thought it might be difficult to have a relationship with him. But honestly, I thought I might have a problem being sexual with him, I never thought that'd we'd fight like this.

The week before Christmas break was the most confusing. I was all over the place in my thinking. One minute, I was sure that I was in love with Jeff and that I must be bisexual; the next I would decide the whole idea was just a crazy idea born of stress and an over active imagination. I suppose, I tend to over think things and spend too much time in my own head analyzing my own thoughts and feelings.

I started doing internet searches on bisexuality but that really didn't yield any answers. There were quizzes that purported to answer the question but for the life of me, I didn't understand how choosing broccoli over cauliflower was going to tell me my sexual orientation. There were scales, graphs, and statistics but mostly the advise was to try it and see if I liked it. Not really helpful since I wasn't going to experiment with Jeff like that.

It wasn't until the day after Christmas that I worked up the courage to look at some gay porn. What I saw put me off the whole idea for days. Men pounding into the asses of other men. It looked painful, humiliating, and it frightened me enough to reconsider the entire idea. More than that, I was sure I never wanted that done to me by Jeff or anyone else.

But a few days later, I was back to believing I was in love with Jeff and I convinced myself that porn wasn't real life after all. I didn't even like straight porn. The women always have bored expressions and dead eyes. So I started looking for videos of boys kissing on YouTube. It seemed safe enough and I discovered that I liked it. Kissing was hot no matter who was doing it so maybe I made some progress there. Interestingly, videos of boys kissing linked me back to porn, and this time I found a few that I could tolerate. Mainly, because they started with kissing and the action escalated slowly enough that I could just stop before seeing anything traumatic.

All of that was just stalling. I knew what I needed to do. It didn't matter if I was 10% gay, 1% gay or even 0.1%. I only needed to know if I could be with Jeff. If I was only attracted to 1 out of 3.5 billion males on the planet, that was OK because I wanted to be with Jeff. Lying in my bed, in my dad's house in Vermont, what I did next was creepy, I know, but I had to. The first time had been inadvertent but I had to think about Jeff deliberately.

Calling up his face was easy. I have every feature, every freckle memorized. Funny that I never thought about what that might mean before. Even how it would feel to be in his arms was easy - I've been there many times. Kissing was harder to imagine. I didn't know then how his lips would feel, how he would taste. So I imagined that he would be firmer than Jennifer, that he would take control. The pictures in my mind were vague and nonspecific. I mostly imagined that we were lying in each other's arms, bare chested, and kissing. It worked and besides the guilt I felt afterwards, it was amazing. Freeing. I knew what I had to do next. I had to seduce Jeff when I got back to Dalton.

The first few days back were frustrating. I tried to amp up my physical displays of affection with Jeff but I soon realized that touching Jeff was so completely part of our relationship that touching him _more_ was almost impossible. I managed to hug him, snuggle him, casually touch him on every occasion possible to no avail. After I spent the entire movie practically molesting him with no success, I decided to pull out all the stops. I felt pretty silly when I looked at myself in the mirror in nothing but a towel. I was trying my best to look sexy but I'm not that confident in my looks. I know I don't have a hot body like Jeff's. Where he doesn't have an once of fat on him, I look a little soft. I sucked in my gut and decided that this was the last chance. Just before going out, I wet me hair a little, so that a little water was running down in what I hoped was an alluring way. I doubted it but it was worth a shot.

My attempt at sultry, sexy, and seductive was an epic fail. I only succeeded in annoying Jeff and as I slipped into sleep, it was almost a relief to give up. I thought Jeff didn't want me and I wasn't going to try again. At least that's what I thought that night. Who knows what would have happened if Jeff hadn't kissed me the very next night. I don't know what prompted him to ambush me like that but it took my breath away. The kiss was so much more than I'd imagined. His mouth on mine was like the cure to a disease I didn't even know I had.

Jeff tried to ask me questions, I think, but all I could do was kiss him. I didn't want to talk because while he was kissing me, everything was right. All my fears and doubts melted away. The next morning was even better, I didn't even think about what I was doing, I just acted. Jeff was so gorgeous and sexy in the shower that I couldn't keep my hands off him if I tried. It seemed so easy, so natural but as the day wore on, my anxiety came back. I didn't know what Jeff would want to do with an entire weekend ahead of us. Even though we'd had sex in the morning, I started to be afraid I wouldn't be able to again. What if we got in bed and I couldn't get it up? What if he wanted anal sex? All these thoughts plagued me but Jeff soothed them away with his touches. Things only got better after that. Every day was easier than the day before.

We made love every morning and every night. I don't care what anyone else says, even Jeff, that's how it felt to me. Before lunch, we'd sneak to a deserted study room and make out. Once, our make out session turned unexpectedly more steamy than usual. Jeff grabbed my ass, lifted me, and pressed me against the wall. I had no choice but to wrap my legs around his waist. I knew we should stop and try to cool down, I may have even suggested it but apparently waiting until the end of the day wasn't an option.

All I could do was hang on for dear life, my head buried into his neck as he thrust hard against me. We were lucky no one came by because we were both too far gone to contain our moans. Jeff came hard with a groan that sent a thrill through my body as I dug my nails into his back.

"Oops, I'm going to have to go back to our room now," he smirked not looking sorry at all as I lowered my self back onto my feet, still wobbly.

"I'll try to compose myself for class," I suggested.

"Are you sure you wouldn't rather help me get changed?" he asked palming my erection. I couldn't really say no.

We were barely in the door of our room before he was out his soiled pants and underwear and undoing my fly. He dropped to his knees in front of me and swallowed me in one move. I tangled my fingers in his hair and tried to give him encouraging compliments about his oral skills but I'm pretty sure that only incoherent babbling came out of my mouth.

"I'm not going to last long at this rate," I warned him.

I looked down at my boyfriend smiling and moaning around my cock, then I saw that he was jerking himself off while he was sucking me and I was gone. Needless to say, we never made it to lunch that day.

Have I mentioned that Jeff is awesome at giving head? Apparently, it is a natural born talent. The very first time, I was so wrecked that he had to hold me for minutes, pitifully rubbing his hard cock against me before I was capable of doing anything about it. He made it look easy but it wasn't for me. The first time I tried to blow Jeff, I'm pretty sure it was a bad for him as it was for me. I hadn't thought it was possible to not enjoy receiving a blow-job but, yeah, I was that bad. I couldn't stop gagging and by the time I gave up my jaw was hurting and my nose was running in the most unsexy way imaginable.

Jeff was a sweetheart about it, assuring me that I didn't need to do it if I didn't want to. It wasn't until the fourth try that I finally got it right. Apparently, I'm a slow learner but practice makes perfect.

After being with him for thirty-nine days, I have trouble remembering why I ever thought I couldn't be sexual with Jeff. But I have no trouble remembering the first time I sucked him off and really enjoyed it. I hadn't expected to enjoy it beyond the feeling of accomplishment, the satisfaction of making Jeff feel fantastic, but I did. I love doing it but it isn't my favorite sexual activity with Jeff.

The first time we did that was the first time we spent the night at Jeff's house after becoming boyfriends. Jeff was naked on top of me in his bed. I ran my hands along his back, enjoying the feeling of his muscles under my fingers. It never failed to turn me on, the weight of him on top of me, his searing kisses, his skin under my hands.

OK, there was one time Jeff tried to get me interested that failed, but having been sucked dry less than thirty minutes before might have been the reason. Unlike my horn-dog boyfriend, who is a mutant with the super power of infinite erections, I'm only human.

I was definitely responding to Jeff's insistent attentions that night, though I was nervous about being in his parent's house.

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" I protested a little hypocritically since my hands were on his ass at the time.

"This is a fantastic idea," he murmured dragging his lips along my neck. "The best idea _ever,_ in fact," he continued as he moved his lips to my collar bone. "We should have been doing this for years." Our relationship was still new, only the second weekend we'd been together. We were both still a little giddy and I had to agree that it was kind of a shame that we hadn't discovered having sex with each other so much sooner in our relationship.

"Are you sure, with your parents downstairs?"

"Their bedroom is on the other side of the house and they never come upstairs. Never," he promised before sucking on my nipple causing me to forget all of my objections.

He pulled away from me to start digging through the drawer next to be bed. I missed his touch immediately, shamefully jealous of whatever task had taken him from me for even a few seconds. When he pulled out a bottle of lube, I was a little apprehensive and it must have shown on my face.

"Relax," he said kissing my jaw. "It's just better than lotion, that's all. I wouldn't ask you to do anything you don't want to do." His hand spreading the slick stuff on my shaft felt amazing but I wanted him closer. I turned on my side, slid one arm under him, wrapped the other around his waist and pulled him so that we where chest to chest, touching all along our bodies. He wrapped his arms around me as we kissed and instinctively thrusting into each other. Soon we were moaning and frantic, the friction of our slick cocks was the most amazing thing I'd ever felt. But it wasn't enough; I tried to pull him closer, discovering it wasn't possible, he rolled me over onto my back and frotted into me harder and faster. I wrapped my legs around his waist and dug my heels into his ass at the same time my nails scratched frantically at his back.

We came within seconds of each other and he collapsed on top of me, lying there for a while as I nuzzled his neck. When our breathing returned to normal, he looked at me with a smile and said, "We're definitely doing that again."

"Yeah, let's add that to the favorites list," I agreed. It's still my favorite, even after discovering the joys of oral sex. I love giving and receiving blow-jobs but the closeness I feel when every part of me is touching every part of him is something I crave.

Don't get me wrong, there's still much more than sex in our relationship. It's just that the sex is so new. I love just snuggling up against him when I'm studying or reading. Some of my happiest moments are sweet silent evenings spent reading with my head in Jeff's lap, while he absentmindedly strokes my hair, or caresses my arms. Or when we spoon while watching a video, clasping our hands together in front of my chest. Jeff is always the big spoon since he's so tall. I don't mind, I guess, I selfishly prefer it.

As I lie in our bed alone, I cling to these memories and I know we are going to be OK. It's just a lover's quarrel. I'm not used to it but we'll make up soon and we'll be fine after we do. I have nearly three years of friendship with Jeff to rely on and I know that can't be ruined by something so stupid as being jealous of some girl that I don't even like.

When I hear the knock on the door, my brain is a little addled and I run to open it expecting Jeff. Of course, Jeff wouldn't knock; it's his room. I open the door and see Trent standing there, a small suitcase by his side.

"I'm your new roommate," he says sullenly as he pushes past me. "Which bed is mine?"

I stand in stunned silence.

"Jeff moved in with Thad and they kicked me out so you're stuck with me," he clarifies. "So which bed is mine?"

I look at the two beds; mine hasn't been slept in since the first night I stayed with Jeff. I point to it and say, "You can have that one. The sheets are clean."

I get ready for bed in a state of shock. I'd thought Jeff had gone home to spend the night but the idea of him moving to another room just doesn't even register properly in my brain. It isn't real to me. I climb into the bed that I've shared with Jeff for the past month. I pull his pillow to my face and breath in his scent. I try not to cry again but I do. At least Trent won't hear me; he wears headphones to bed but I don't ask why.

This is all Blaine's fault - his stupid crushes and emergency Warbler's meetings.

"What do you think this emergency meeting is about?" Jeff asked me.

"I don't know," I reply with a shrug. "What Warbler's business is ever an emergency?" We take our seats and wait for Wes to call the meeting to order.

"This emergency meeting is called to order," Wes declared solemnly banging his gavel dramatically. "Junior member, Blaine Anderson, the floor is yours."

Kurt clapped inappropriately as Blaine took the floor. Everyone else looked about as bored as I felt. I really needed to get to work on a plan for what Jeff and I would be doing on Valentine's Day. We hadn't been together very long but I was sure the first Valentine's Day a couple spends together is supposed to be special.

"Esteemed counsel, I'll be brief. Simply put, I'm in love," Blaine declared with a sappy smile.

That softened everyone's hearts because we'd all been watching the silly dance of 'we're not together' that he and Kurt had been doing for months. I'm sure nearly everyone in the room was thinking the same thing I was. It's about time! I couldn't contain my grin as I look at Kurt, who was sitting in front of me.

"I'm not really good at talking about my feelings," Blaine continued looking goofier by the minute, "I'm much better at singing them but still I could use a little help. Which is why I'm asking to enlist the Warblers to help serenade this individual in song...off campus."

That didn't go over well, of course.

"I know what I'm asking is slightly unusual," Blaine pleaded. I knew as soon as he said off campus, he'd lost the counsel. I didn't understand why he'd even suggest it at the time. Kurt was right there. In fact, that's when I started to realize there was something hinky because why was he asking for help serenading Kurt, right in front of him?

Wes, of course, trotted out the 1907 incident. Thad got excessively dramatic, ostensibly defending the Warblers reputation but it probably had more to do with his jealousy than any traditions. Wes set a new record in the use of Gaveley during the proceeding, which I'm sure he enjoyed.

Ironically, it was Kurt who swayed everyone to go along with the Gap Attack. When Kurt started to speak, I had a bad feeling about where this was going.

When I heard Blaine say, "At the Gap at the North Hills Mall. I'd like to call it The Warbler's Gap Attack" I knew it wasn't good for Kurt. I couldn't help but laugh at the name; we all did.

When Blaine said, "The guy that I like is the junior manager there," I wasn't actually surprised. Typical clueless Blaine. We all voted to do it because it seemed like fun.

Then he dropped the even bigger bomb. Blaine wanted to sing "When I Get You Alone".

We sang to Blaine's crush on Saturday and were a big hit with the mall crowd. Not so much with the unfortunate Gap assistant manager who ran from us like we were homeless bums begging for change. Other than the fact we got kicked out by mall security and banned from The Gap for life, it went well. Our performance was spectacular. It might have been the most fun the Warblers have ever had. Blaine climbed on every surface of The Gap and we obliged him by spinning him on anything with wheels. I felt bad for Kurt who just stood gaping in shock at the explicit lyrics, or maybe it was just Blaine's enthusiasm that got to him. Either way, he soon found out that Blaine's crushes never went well.

Jeff looked so sexy in his sunglasses as he did a credible impression of the singing secret service along with Jon. Like I said, we all had fun with it.

"So what should we do for Valentine's Day?" I asked him when we got back to the dorm.

"You mean that wasn't it?" he laughed.

"No, of course not," I teased as I wrapped my arms around him. "We should go somewhere romantic for dinner."

"It's just a silly holiday, invented by greeting card companies; we don't need to do anything."

"Oh, don't tell me you're a cynic. I happen to be a romantic, so Jeff Stark, will you please go to dinner with me on Valentine's Day?"

"OK, but I go to dinner with you every night, anyway."

"Well, we'll do something special when we get back," I promised with a kiss.

Unfortunately, our plans were derailed by non other than Kurt Hummel who decided that one emergency meeting to discuss Valentine's Day serenading wasn't enough. Everyone had fun at the Gap Attack so his suggestion that we sing at a lonely heart's club dinner was better received than Blaine's request had been. He sweetened the deal by promising to introduce the straight guys to all the single girls he knew at his old school.

Maybe if Jeff and I had gone to dinner as we'd originally planned we wouldn't have had the fight over Santana. I rack my brain to see if Jeff had a point but I still don't remember checking her out. Not really. I try to sleep, telling myself that we'll talk in the morning and everything will be fine once we do.


	10. Chapter 10

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3800+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 10**_

_**15 February 2011, Dalton Academy, Westerville, Ohio **_

I wake up having slept very little last night. I get ready for class numbly, disappointed that Jeff hadn't come back already. I'd expected him to show up any minute to apologize as I drifted in and out of sleep. He doesn't show up for breakfast either. I don't see him until he takes his seat next to me in our first class just before the bell rings.

I write several texts as I watch him out of the corner of my eye but I erase every one. I feel silly because there's never been a time when weren't communicating but I'm at a loss for words. He should apologize to me so what am I supposed to say to start the conversation? Time seems to stands still as the teacher drones on and on. I've never bothered to pay attention before and it's unbearable without my usual distraction.

The bell rings and Jeff bolts out the door. I catch up to him and snag his arm.

"Jeff, talk to me. We can't be not talking to each other. We just can't."

He looks sad as he says, "Please, just give me some space today, OK? We'll talk after school. I'll come to your room after French and we'll talk. I promise. Nick, I just need some space until then."

Your room. The words sink my heart.

"OK, we'll talk after school," I agree. It's hard but I give him the space he asked for. I sit with the Warblers at lunch but Jeff doesn't show. Blaine and Kurt are sitting across from each other making googly eyes. Everything seems back to normal for them, the Gap Attack already forgotten or at least forgiven. From the way they sang 'I love you' at each other last night, one would think they were together but they were still in denial, apparently. I give Thad a questioning look but he just shrugs. I barely hear the conversations around me but I think Dave and Wes are mostly gushing about the lonely hearts club dinner and how the Warblers need to expand their horizons.

"Nursing homes!" exclaims Dave. "Kurt didn't you say that New Directions performed at nursing homes? We should definitely add that to our repertoire."

Kurt just gives him a pained smile.

By the end of the day, I'm rethinking all of my criticism of the cliched stories about best friends who don't want to ruin their friendship with romance. I've always thought that was stupid. Why wouldn't they just go for it? Now I understand. I miss my best friend much more than I miss my lover. It never even occurred to me that this could happen. Even if it's just for a day - and I have to believe that it is. Once we talk, everything will be fine. But not talking to Jeff even for a day is killing me.

Jeff comes through the door with a cart and some boxes - not what I hoped for at all.

"Hey," I say lamely.

"I came to get all of my stuff but we should talk."

"You don't have to move out, Jeff. We can work out whatever is going on. I'm still so confused but I'll listen and we'll figure out how to move forward."

"It hurts too much, Nick. I can't."

"I'm sorry. I promise, I won't do it again. Just give me another chance."

Jeff looks really guilty when he hears my apology.

"No, I'm sorry Nick. I'm the one who was completely out of line. I didn't mean any of the things I said last night. I was hurt and upset and I said some things that were unforgivable. You didn't do anything wrong. I know that the things we were doing together meant something to you."

"Then why are you moving out? You know I love you, right? You didn't mean that part about us just messing around, about me just using you?"

"I know you love me, Nick. I know you'd never hurt me intentionally."

"Then everything can be the way it was," I insist moving forward to take him in my arms.

"No," he says, moving away shaking his head. "No, it hurts too much. I can't bear being a way-station on the road to your real life."

"You're not. Jeff, you're confusing me so much. One second, you say you know I love you, that I'm not using you and then you say you're a way-station? This _is_ my real life. _You_ are my real life."

"Just hear me out, Nick. I know that it's all my fault. I should have never kissed you. I should have never wished this life for you. I knew you weren't gay; I just let my own selfish desire blind me to the truth. I wanted you so much that I believed what I wanted to believe. You're a good person and I know you believe that you're in love with me. I know that you mean everything you say but it isn't going to last and it's better to get it over with now before we go any further. It hurts enough now, if you leave me in a year, I don't know if I could stand it. I love you so much Nick, I want you to have the best life."

"I want that life with _you_, Jeff. I have no idea why you're so obsessed with this idea that I'm going to leave you. It isn't true. You're my life. Don't throw this away because you're afraid that we'll break up some time in the future. Come on, dude, you can't live you're life like that! And what do you mean before we go further? I've given you my heart, what more do you want? Sex? Is that what you mean? Fine, if that's what it takes to convince you that I'm committed, then fine. We've already been having sex but if you think you have to stick your dick in my ass to call it sex, then OK." I don't see it that way but I know plenty of people claim you aren't having sex unless someone gets penetrated. I don't care how much it hurts; I'll do anything. I start to undo my belt as I continue, "Lying on my stomach or on all fours?"

He grabs my hands and says softly, "Stop. Nick, just stop. It's over between us. I'm sorry that it ever started. I've screwed everything up because I'm a selfish perverted deviant. We were best friends and I messed that up. I corrupted our friendship with my horniness. Just go and let me pack my things, please."

"Jeff, no. You can't mean that. Don't give up, please. Those things you called yourself, they aren't true. I want this. I want you. I was trying to seduce _you _when you kissed me. There's nothing wrong with us loving each other. Please don't give up on us. I love you so much. Even if you don't want to be lovers, Jeff, you can't mean we aren't still friends."

"I don't know. Maybe we can be later. Now, it just hurts too much. Just let me pack my things alone, please?"

I go because it's clear that Jeff isn't hearing anything I'm saying. I have to figure out why he's so sure that I'll leave him. What is he so afraid of? Just days ago, things were perfect between us so how could that change so fast? If he was so insecure, why were things fine when he thought I was gay? I'm hurt and confused but I'm not giving up. Jeff was there for me in the worst time of my life; he's been the best friend a person could want and I love him more than I thought was possible. Not matter what crazy idea he's got in his head now, I know we'll get past it.

I sit alone in the library with my thoughts. I'm so caught up in them that I almost don't see Thad when he sits down across from me.

"How are you holding up?" he asks with concern in his voice.

"Fine. Jeff and I are just having a little disagreement. You know how roommates can be. Little things get blown out of proportion and the next thing you know, one of you is moving out."

Thad puts his hand on mine in an unexpected display of sympathy. Thad is not know for physical affection.

"We all know that you and Jeff are in love, Nick. You guys weren't exactly subtle about it. You don't have to hide how upset you are. I don't know what the two of you are fighting about but I know that Jeff loves you and it will all work out. It has to, right?"

"We're that obvious?"

"Yeah, worse than Blaine and Kurt."

"Oh. So what gave us away?"

"Practically having sex during Inception and the nooners you guys had every day may have been hints that you'd taken things to a new level."

I blush furiously because I hadn't realized that people had noticed.

"Technically, we were just making out, for the record." Most of the time.

"Whatever," he snorts. "The bottom line is that we all know that you're in a relationship and now you've having some kind of fight. So if there's anything I can do to help the two of you make up just let me know."

"I didn't know you were such a hopeless romantic."

Thad rolled his eyes and said, "Seriously? I'm the guy who has been carrying a torch for Blaine Anderson for more than a year."

"Yeah, well I hope you know that isn't going to ever work out. Sometimes when you love somebody, they just don't love you back and there's nothing you can do about it. Maybe you should think about dating someone. There are plenty of other gay guys here at Dalton." I don't say it to be mean; I actually hope that Thad will eventually find someone who returns his affections. He's a little over dramatic and formal but Thad is a good guy.

"I'm not stupid. I know that but sometimes you can't help who you love even if it doesn't make any sense at all. Besides, you're giving me love advice? You might want to rethink that since you're boyfriend just moved in with me."

"Yeah. Maybe so. Apparently, I'm clueless."

"What are you two fighting about? Jeff wouldn't tell me."

"I honestly don't have a clue, Thad." I shake my head in dismay. "It's all so confusing because I thought we were fine. We were fine until the stupid lonely hearts club dinner. Now he's gotten it in his head that I'm going to leave him and he broke up with me to avoid being dumped."

"Ouch. The preemptive breakup. That means he has serious self esteem issues. I wouldn't have thought that. He seems so laid back and care free. Did he give you any clue?"

"Something to do with Santana. I don't really understand it."

"New Directions Santana? Aaron's Santana?"

"What?"

"Aaron totally hooked up with her after the dinner. Surely you noticed the way he was flirting? Well, Wes was all over her too but he has a girlfriend. Apparently, she is like catnip for straight guys. Not that I would know. Gay." He says the last word pointing to himself with a chuckle.

"Oh, trust me, she is hot. Sizzling. Like super smoking I would totally tap that if I weren't such a geek that she's way out of my league hot. And if I weren't in love with Jeff." OK, maybe I did notice that she was hot but it doesn't mean I would ever do anything about it.

"I see the problem now," said Thad thoughtfully.

"Really? You too? Jeff can't have a problem with me being bisexual. That's just not fair; I can't do anything about that."

"I know it isn't fair, Nick. Look, I don't think this way but plenty of of people think you're either gay, straight, or lying."

"I hate those labels. Why do we need labels anyway? What does it matter? I'm in love with Jeff. I want to be with Jeff. That should be all that matters."

"You're right it should. But if people can put a label on you then they think they know who you are."

"That's so stupid. I'd gladly call myself gay if that would solve Jeff's insecurities but I don't think he'd believe me now. I don't get it. He is so hot that he could have any gay guy at this school. I never worry about that because he loves me. And even if he was going to leave me or cheat on me, worrying about it won't help."

"Not any gay guy," Thad laughs. "He's not my type."

"Let me guess - your type is short, dark, and dapper?"

"Yeah, it is. Nick, I'm going to help you get Jeff back. Don't worry. Now that he's my roommate, you have the inside scoop on what he's thinking. You and I will be a team. We'll call it...Operation Get Jeff Back!"

"Seriously? That's the best you can come up with?"

"Creativity isn't my strong suit. Sorry."

"That's OK. I appreciate you helping me, Thad." I suddenly realize that we have a deadline. "Oh, no. Jeff's birthday! We have to be back together by then. We can't be apart for his birthday."

"When is it?"

"February 27th. He'll be seventeen. I can't miss his birthday."

"You won't. Surely even if you aren't back together, you can still throw him a party can't you?"

"Yeah, maybe we can do something with that. I don't know what. I hope it doesn't take that long, Thad. Just one day has been so hard to deal with. You don't think it will take that long for us to get back together do you?"

He shrugs and makes some non-committal noises. I don't blame him. I don't even have a plan for winning Jeff back. I don't even know where to start. My attempted seduction was an epic fail and we'd have never gotten together in the first place if he hadn't taken the leap.

_**22 February 2011, Dalton Academy,Westerville, Ohio **_

The past week has been bad but I can't honestly say it was the worst week of my life. That would be my first week at Dalton. My entire first year here was fairly bad. It was made better by meeting Jeff and becoming best friends but it was still bad. So I know I can handle anything the world throws at me, even being inexplicably dumped by the love of my life.

It's a little easier than it might have been because I don't believe that we are done. Jeff isn't himself either. Jeff has always been quick to smile and goof around so seeing him looking sad and forlorn is like seeing an entirely different person take his place. Sometimes, I just want to go up to him and shake him, saying 'why are you doing this to yourself?' but I don't.

This morning, Jeff and I aren't the only ones acting strange. Kurt and Blaine are apparently fighting about something. Kurt is sitting at a table with Jeff gesticulating emphatically and I can only guess that the topic is Blaine. What else would it be? Blaine is sitting on the other side of the dining room with Thad. For once, Thad has Blaine's full attention and he's soaking it up like a flower drinking in the sun. Blaine is looking decidedly calmer than Kurt but I'm guessing that the two conversations have a lot in common.

At lunch, Jeff sits with Jon and Derrick. Suddenly, I'm much more anxious than I have been about Jeff and I getting back together. I have an urge to go over and stake my claim. How would Jeff react if I did? I imagine walking up to them and saying directly to Derrick "Keep your hands off my man!". Would Jeff be flattered or annoyed? Oh god, Jeff is smiling. I'd be glad to see him smile if he weren't smiling at something Derrick said.

I see Kurt looking around for a place to sit and I wave at him. Maybe he can give me some intel on what's going on with Jeff. It seems unlikely but I'm just making myself sick staring at the three of them over there.

"Hey, Nick. Can I sit with you for lunch? Blaine seems to have gone off campus. And the Warblers..." he looks around with a puzzled expression, "seem to be scattered today."

"Yeah, sure, that happens sometimes. Especially, when Thad, Dave, and Wes are all missing at the same time. I'm guessing they are all off somewhere together planning some Warbler's outing."

"I guess that makes sense. I don't really want to see Blaine right now anyway," he huffed as he sat down.

"What's going on, did you have a fight?"

"You might say that. I tried to be understanding about it, since he was drunk and all, but then he made a date with her!"

"Whoa, back up. You've seen Blaine drunk? He's pretty crazy when he gets drunk but if you want my opinion, drunk Blaine is the real Blaine. He's not so put together and dapper as he seems. Who'd he make a date with?"

"You are not helping. Ms. Rachel Berry, that's who. One drunken kiss with her and he's decided to go back in the closet. It's outrageous. "

"What do you mean back in the closet? That's not possible, that's like saying you want to unspill the milk after it's on the floor. He's going out with Rachel, your friend that you introduced us to?"

"More like frenemy - but yes that's the one. They kissed during spin the bottle and she became enamored with him and asked him out on a date. And he said yes!"

"Kurt, everyone knows that you are into Blaine but he's single. I know it hurts but he's free to date anyone he wants. Rachel does seem like an odd choice."

"You think?" he says sarcastically. "He's gay."

"How do you know? He's only seventeen, maybe he's just never met a girl he was sexually attracted to before. Maybe, he's bisexual and just didn't realize it before."

Kurt gives my his bitch please look and say, "Bisexual is just something gay guys claim to be when they aren't ready to admit their gay."

"That's just ignorant, Kurt. I can't believe you really meant that."

"Either a guy is gay and trying to fool himself and everyone else or he's straight and just experimenting."

"You think it can only be one or the other? Kurt, there is a whole lot of gray in between those two extremes and I can assure you people - real people - fall in that gray area."

"Who?"

"Me for one. I thought I was straight but I fell in love with a boy so I'm bisexual."

"So you're gay. I didn't realize that. I thought Blaine and I were the only gay guys at Dalton."

I laugh because it was just too funny not to, despite the amount of ignorance coming from the boy in front of me.

"You and Blaine are definitely not the only two gay boys at Dalton," I admonish him, shaking my head.

"Who else? Besides you."

"I'm not gay, I'm bi. But Jeff for one. I thought when he said that you didn't realize it was a date that he was speaking figuratively, as in you were too wrapped up in Blaine. It never occurred to me that you didn't even know he was gay."

"Jeff's gay? Oh my god, that was a date?" he squeaks. "Wow, I went on a real date." Kurt looks over at Jeff. "And he's really hot. Tall, blond, and..."

"Not an option," I growl. "He's _mine_." I surprise myself with the vehemence of my tone.

"Oh," he gasps, snapping his eyes back to me. "So he's the boy that you fell in love with. I should have known. The two of you are practically inseparable. Except lately."

"We're on a break but I intend to fix that as soon as I can," I insist.

"So anyone else beside you, Blaine, and Jeff," he asks, apparently trolling for leads.

"That you know? Thad. Also, Derrick but you don't know him. I'm sure there are others. It's not like there's a directory."

"So what makes you think that you're bi if you're in love with Jeff?"

"I _know_ I'm bi because I'm in love with Jeff. I've always been attracted to girls. I had a girlfriend but Jeff is the only boy I've ever wanted. I only want to be with Jeff but I could be with a girl if I was interested. So, that makes me bi. I'm only seventeen so I guess I don't know that I'll never be attracted to any other boy but so far it's just Jeff. I wish I were gay; it would make my life easier."

"Are you kidding me? Why would anyone want to be gay? To be bullied, harassed, and hated? To have everyone tell you that who you are is wrong? That you'll burn in hell? Why would any one choose that?" Kurt looks at me like I'm insane. But he's answered all my questions about what's going on in Jeff's head. It's about choice. Jeff was OK with us being together when he thought I was gay because it meant I couldn't choose the 'better' option. He told me but I didn't really understand it coming from him the way I do hearing it from Kurt's lips.

"So no one chooses to take the difficult path? The road less traveled? What about atheists? No one chooses to be an atheist because it isn't popular in this very religious country? No one chooses to protest a very popular war? No one wants to be an environmentalist? What about Muslims? Aren't they hated and discriminated against every day? Do you see them abandoning their religion? No one chooses to stand up for human rights in the face of tyranny?"

"That's all different from being gay."

"Is it? What about your best friend, Mercedes, if someone invented a way to turn black people white, would she take it?"

"That's a horrible thing to suggest."

"Yes, it really is. The problems you have had, Kurt, aren't because you're gay. Those problem are with the world, not you. It isn't wrong to love someone; it just isn't. I love Jeff. I choose him, not because he's a boy, but because I love him. It's that simple for me. I don't care what you call it."

"I guess you've thought about this a lot."

"You might say that," I chuckle. "I have plenty of time on my hands these days."

I'm going to change that soon. I think I know how to win Jeff back now.


	11. Chapter 11

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 3900+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only.**_

_**Chapter 11**_

_**26 February 2011, Magnetic Springs, Ohio **_

**The Stark House**

I miss Nick so much and the worst part is that it's all my own fault. We had the perfect relationship and I let my stupid sex crazed fantasies cloud my brain. I traded two and half years of friendship for a few orgasms. And worse than my own pain is seeing Nick in pain. I know he misses me too and it hurts so much to see what I've done to him.

I miss watching our shows together, talking during the day, his silly texts, playing video games, and staying up late at night just goofing around with our crazy ideas. I miss my best friend. I've decided that I just have to suck up the pain and go to him on Monday. I'm going to talk to him and ask if we can go back to how things were before I kissed him. Before we slept together for over a month. Before we spent so many hours exploring each other's bodies.

I want to go back and try to be the best friend he deserves and needs. I should have been going to the Country Day - Dalton mixers and helping him find a girlfriend. I was supposed to be his wingman not his fuck buddy. No matter how much I miss being boyfriends and how much it's going to hurt being so close to him again, it won't hurt half as much as being completely apart. I know he'll agree. He'll even be happy about it because he loves me. _That's_ actually the worst part. Nick loves me and I took advantage of his love.

I really hope we can go back to living together because Thad is driving me crazy. Besides the fact that we have absolutely nothing in common, he is a total neat freak, and he never stops talking. That would be OK if he said anything interesting but his ideas for conversations would put the worst insomniac to sleep. Unfortunately, he doesn't bore himself enough because he's up most of the night. He's also incredibly nosy. In the last two weeks, he has peppered me constantly with personal questions about Nick and our relationship. No matter how many times I tell him I don't want to talk about it, he just doesn't quit. I don't know how Trent survived living with him.

Being at my parent's house is a relief. Tomorrow is my birthday and I'm sure my parents have something planned. Everyone is pretending they have forgotten but they always do that. There's no doubt there'll be some lame surprise party for me tomorrow. My brother is home for the weekend - it's the first time I've seen him since Christmas. I haven't told him about what's been going on with Nick. I haven't told anyone in my family. They must be wondering, though, since I've come home twice without Nick and that hasn't happened since our freshman year.

I sit in the family room playing Assassin's Creed to try and keep my mind numb but it isn't really working. I keep dying because I can't focus properly.

"Hey, little dude," says my brother as he plops down beside me on the couch.

"You can't call me that any more. I'm taller than you now," I counter while trying to jump from one roof top to another without falling.

"Ha, barely. And you'll always be younger."

"Frak!" I die again.

"Just quit playing for a while and talk to your brother, OK? I haven't seen you in two months. What's going on?"

I turn to him and shrug.

"Nothing."

He gives me a skeptical look.

"I'm your brother; don't try that on me. I know something's wrong. You can talk to me. You can always talk to me."

"It's complicated."

"Does it have something to do with Nick?

"Why would you say that?"

"Because he isn't here and you are. Just spit it out, little dude; I'm not going anywhere until you tell me why you are so depressed. I don't think I've seen you smile since I got home. I thought you were going to cry when mom gave you a waffle this morning. You can't tell me that isn't because of Nick. I'm not blind."

"Things got complicated after he came back from Christmas break and now I'm trying to un-complicate them. We're spending some time apart while I try to...regain my...composure."

"By complicated, you mean sexually?"

I look away because I'm too ashamed to meet his eyes.

"Yeah, I crossed some lines that I shouldn't have with Nick. Sexually."

"Oh. So, he didn't want this attention? Did you have a falling out because you came on to him and he didn't feel the same? I know some straight guys can freak out when gay guys hit on them but Nick is so close with you; I'd have thought that he would just say no and leave it at that. In fact, I thought that maybe you guys were already a bit more than friends years ago."

"He didn't say no," I say softly looking at the floor.

"Look at me, little dude. For god's sake, you're going to be seventeen tomorrow. Stop acting like you're twelve and spit it out. If he didn't say no, then what's the problem? Have you guys been having sex?"

"I guess. Sort of. It depends."

He gives an exasperated sound.

"Don't tell me you don't know enough to know if you were having sex or not. It's not that complicated of a question. I know Dad gave you the sex talk and mine was certainly detailed enough."

"Does oral sex count?"

"Dude, it has sex right there in the name. So, yeah it totally counts. I mean if I get a blow-job from another girl there is no way I'm getting a pass from my girlfriend because it isn't really sex."

"Yes, we've been having sex. We've been together since the beginning of January but it was a huge mistake. I shouldn't have done it. I've been in love with Nick for years and I wanted to believe that we could be together. I wanted it so much that I convinced myself that Nick was gay but he isn't. So now we aren't together anymore and it's killing me. It's worse than that; we aren't even talking and I miss him so much. I really messed up, Danny. I completely ruined what we had. Nick was my best friend and I ruined it. Do you think I can fix this? I just want things to be the way they were between us before and I'm going to try, but do you think it will work?"

"Slow down. I don't think I'm getting my facts straight here. Did Nick break up with you? Why? You said he wasn't gay but the two of you have been having sex? I need more details - not _those_ kind of details, but relationship details. Was this a friends with benefits kind of thing or was it more serious? Who started it and who ended it? And most of all, why are you two breaking up?"

"Like I said, I've been in love with Nick for years so when he came back from break, I convinced myself that he was gay and that he wanted me. I kissed him. We started doing things together. Sexual things. Then I realized that he's actually straight so I ended things."

"OK, this may be news to you but, Jeff, straight boys don't have sex with dudes. It's kind of the definition of straight. And I'm pretty sure that Nick has been in love with you for about as long as you've been in love with him. At least, it looks that way to me. If neither of you did anything about it until recently...well I can't figure out why. I still don't understand what the breakup was about. Did you have a fight? Did he tell you that he was straight? Because if he did then he's lying."

"I ended it. I realized that he was straight because I saw him checking out a girl and that's when it all hit me. He'd told me that he had a girlfriend over the summer. More than just told me; he was so excited about it and told me in graphic detail about his sexual experience with her. I knew all of that but I convinced myself that he'd just been in the closet. When I saw the way he looked at Santana, I knew he wasn't gay. He looked at her the same way Wes and all the other straight guys did. So I had to end it, Danny. Everything that I thought we had was a lie. It wasn't his fault though. It was all me. Because I'm a perverted deviant and anything he has with me is just temporary. He was just biding his time while waiting to find a girlfriend."

"Whoa, there are so many problems with what you just told me. None of this sounds like the Nick I know. Jeff, I said I didn't want those kind of details but I have to know since you're saying Nick is straight. Was this one-sided? Did you just take care of him? Because if he used you like that, I just don't even know...Jeff, were you blowing him for a whole month and he just let you?"

"No! It wasn't like that. Nick was really good to me. I don't want to get into details either, but everything was reciprocal. I thought we were in love."

"OK, then. You are an _idiot_. I don't know who has been telling you that you are a 'perverted deviant' but you need to stop listening to them and listen to your brother. There is nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with loving Nick. If he wanted to be with you then you didn't do anything wrong. You know what, even if he didn't, if you took a chance and told him how you felt; that's OK. But I don't think that's what happened. I've watched the two of you for a long time now and I think Nick is just as in love with you as you are with him. If you are willing to throw that away, just because he looked at someone else, then you are a fool. Love doesn't happen that often and you should take all you can get. What does Nick say about all of this? What did he say when you confronted him about this girl?"

"He said he was sorry if he did. That maybe he did but he didn't really notice doing it. He kept telling me to give him another chance. That he loved me."

"And you didn't believe him?"

"I believe that he believes it. I mean, I know that Nick loves me. But I also know that being together like that can't last. He's going to meet a girl someday. Get married...have kids...have a normal life. I can't give him that."

"I should just smack you. Are we even brothers? Dude, what part of it's OK for guys to be into guys do you not get? Look, I know we aren't there yet but times are changing. You'll be able to get married and have kids some day. I'm sorry that it isn't like that already but it will be. You have to know that. Am I getting through that thick skull of yours?"

"Maybe. A little. I don't know. Do you really believe I should be with Nick? Even if he could leave me for a girl some day? Even if I wanted to, why would he take me back?"

My brother just snorts and shakes his head before continuing.

"I can only hope to meet a girl that loves me as much as Nick loves you. Yeah, it's worth it. People break up all the time. They get their hearts broken. People fall out of love or fall in love with someone else. That's the risk you take. Gay, straight, bi, or whatever, when you love someone, you risk getting hurt. But if you don't even try then you're just numb. Do you understand?"

"Maybe in my head but I don't know if can do it."

"Well, that's progress. I'll leave you to your thoughts."

He gets up to leave and turns back to me saying, "Oh, and tomorrow? Be prepared - there's going to be a giant party. Try to act like you enjoy it."

"Yeah, I kind of figured that already. I don't know how they are going to top giving me the Mercedes though."

He just smirks knowingly.

_**27 February 2011, Columbus, Ohio **_

**The Mall**

I go along with my parent's fiction that we are going shopping even though we are obviously going to my birthday party. My brother and sister play along as well even though we've all been through this so many times before that it's pretty absurd to pretend we don't know what's going on. We do the same thing five times a year! I don't remember the last time any of us was surprised.

We arrive at the restaurant where we are supposedly going to have a family dinner but as soon as we walk in, everyone yells surprise. My parent's have reserved the whole place for the party. My friends from Dalton are all here - the Warblers, my teammates, and a few others. I only have eyes for one person, though. Of course, he's here. My parents wouldn't have thrown me a party without inviting Nick. Once the chorus of happy birthday's die down, I notice that Nick has a mic and even though the Warblers are in their street clothes, they are all lined up for a song.

Oh god, I can't believe they are going to serenade me for my birthday. I just hope Blaine didn't pick Katy Perry. If he sings Firework, I'm going to puke.

"Now that the birthday boy is here, I would like to sing a song dedicated to him," says Nick. Wait, that can't be right. Nick is going to sing lead?

As soon as he starts, I recognize it, of course. We've been rehearsing the vocals already with Blaine as lead but we hadn't started on the choreography yet. Misery. The Warblers mostly dance aimless behind him as he sings directly to me. He doesn't have the frenetic charisma that Blaine brings to his performances but his voice is beautiful and he pours his heart into the song. Especially when he begs "Why won't you answer me?" He changes girl to boy making it abundantly clear - if it wasn't already - to everyone in the room that he is singing this to me.

I want to throw my arms around him and tell him that he doesn't need to do this. That if he'll take me back, I'm his. I let him finish the song instead. He sings the last line and before I can say anything he starts to speak.

"Jeff Stark, I want to tell you something in front of everyone here. I want witnesses because I want you to know how much I really mean it. I swear, I'll post it on the internet just so you'll see that I'm serious and I won't _ever_ take it back. I had a speech but I've totally forgotten it now that you're here in front of me so I'll just keep it simple. I love you. I love you and I want everyone to know it. Will you be my boyfriend? Please take me back."

"You had me at Jeff," I say and throw my arms around him. To my surprise everyone cheers and claps. I think I hear Thad yelling get it Nick! He pulls back from the hug and kisses me. Just a brief chaste kiss since everyone is watching but still, there's no going back now because as soon as his lips touch mine about a dozen camera flashes go off.

We separate and he takes my hand as we walk together.

"Seriously, I give you my heartfelt plea and you make a Jerry Maguire joke?" he teases.

"You had it coming. You made a big speech in front of everyone. That move is forever derivative now."

"I did not say you complete me. I love you and I want everyone to know it is much more sincere."

"Whatever," I snort.

"I missed you," he says seriously.

"I missed you, too."

"Please, don't ever freak out like that again. Promise me. We missed two episodes of Fringe. I can't take that again."

"What? You watched them on Hulu, didn't you?" I tease.

"Don't tell me that you did," he says looking at me with mock horror. "You totally did. Maybe I was wrong about you being boyfriend material after all. If you can't even wait for me to catch up on Fringe episodes..."

"Don't even pretend you didn't watch. I saw your reviews online."

"You did?"

"Of course I did."

Blaine starts singing the Beatles version of "Birthday" and we have a laugh at that.

"It's my birthday and he's already hogging the spotlight."

The rest of the party is the usual. Food, cake, presents, karaoke...and everyone acts like Nick and I being boyfriends is no big deal. Were they all in on his serenade and speech? I try not to think about that.

Trent comes up to up and asks, "Should I move my stuff back to Thad's now?"

"That would be great, if you don't mind," I reply, looking at Nick for confirmation. He nods.

"Alright, then. I'm heading back to Dalton now, I'll be out by the time you two get there."

-o-o-

We get back to the dorm late. As soon as we are in the door, we are kissing like we were never apart. I let myself enjoy it as long as I can because the next part is going to be hard.

"Nick," I say carefully, "We can't just fall back into bed together. We should talk. We should have talked when we first started this. The whole reason we ran into trouble is that we never talked."

"We talk all the time," he objects.

"Not about this. Not about us."

"OK, then we talk," he agrees. We settle down on the bed facing each other, holding hands.

"So what does this mean to you?" I ask.

"I don't really know. I love you. I want to be your boyfriend. That means no dating anyone else. No kissing or other stuff like that with anyone else. I want to sleep with you every night and of course, I want to do all the stuff we were doing. You know...sex."

I smile at that. Yeah, we're teenage boys so, of course, we want to have sex.

"And later? Next year, the year after that?"

"I'm only seventeen. We're only seventeen. That's a little heavy, isn't it? I think I want to be with you forever. I'm so in love with you but can't we just be happy and see how it works out? If we're honest with each other and talk to each other...maybe it will be forever. My parents are divorced so it's hard to make promises but I want us to stay together. What about you?"

"I have a lot of issues with being gay, Nick. You might have guessed from the fact I never told you that I was gay and the way I freaked out when I realized that you're bi. I'm pretty insecure about it. No matter how many times people tell me that it's OK, I guess I don't always feel it. Sometimes I don't feel like I deserve love and happiness. Sometimes I feel like I'm a deviant. I'm not that certain that you won't leave me for a girl but I'd rather take that chance than be without you."

"Oh, Jeff, I'm so sorry. I never realized. You know how I feel about you, don't you? I love you so much and I don't think there's anything wrong with us being together. I never thought there was. There's nothing wrong with you. You're perfect."

He kisses me softly, first on the lips and then all over my face.

"But you are insecure about some of it, aren't you? I know you are," I remind him.

"Yeah, OK. For one, you are so sexy and awesome that I don't think I measure up as a boyfriend. But that just silly vanity. I wasn't sure about starting a relationship with you because I wasn't certain that I _could_. I mean physically. I didn't know if I would be able to because I'd always thought I was straight. But now it's different. Now, just thinking about you turns me on so much so that just isn't an issue any more."

"But you're still afraid sometimes. I can tell because you tense up and give me that terrified look. What are you afraid of?"

"I know. I'm sorry, it's just the one thing really and I know you'll want it. Anal sex terrifies me. But I'm willing to do it if you want to. I've been afraid that you'd ask for it from the first night we spent together. We can though, I'm ready to try it if you want to."

"Yeah, you told me that ever so crudely the night we broke up. I do want to but I don't want to do things that you don't want. What are you afraid of? Does it gross you out?"

"What am I afraid of? Pain. Plain and simple. I'm a wimp about pain."

I laugh because this is exactly why we should talk about things like this.

"Go ahead and laugh at my wimpy girly man fear of you dick in my ass. Way to be a great boyfriend."

"I'm sorry but I couldn't help it. We really _should_ talk about these things. You haven't even asked if I'd want to top, you just assumed that I would. And why on on earth would you think that it would hurt? Why would people do it if it hurts?"

"Because it's your dick in my ass. That's got to hurt, doesn't it? That just can't be good. As to why, I guess, because the guy on top likes it. Don't you want to top? You're right, I never asked, I just thought you would."

I caress his face and kiss him because I'm just so overwhelmed that we're talking about these things. We've done so much together but talking is so much harder.

"It isn't supposed to hurt. If it hurts, you're doing it wrong. Both partners are supposed to enjoy it. As for who tops, I'd like to try both. I hear that's the in thing among progressive gays these days."

"Oh, are you sure? It isn't like you've done it before."

"I'll admit that my knowledge is only theoretical but I promise, I'll be gentle."

"Can we stop talking about this and just kiss for a while?"

I answer him with a kiss.


	12. Chapter 12

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 4100+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only. This chapter is especially smutty.**_

_**Chapter 12**_

_**27 February 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

**Dalton Academy**

"It's time to get up," I whisper in Nick's ear as I squeeze him. I kiss along his neck and nibble a little on on his ear.

He rolls over and pulls me into a slow sensual kiss before answering sleepily, "Morning."

He looks tired but he gives me a sweet smile as he blinks away the sleep. We didn't get much sleep last night. We talked and made out and then talked some more. I told Nick more about my feelings. I revealed things that I'd never said aloud before and he listened. I recounted the story of my first boy kiss and how guilty it made me. Turns out, we really did have a great deal to talk about. Nick revealed just how unsure he'd been about his sexuality in the beginning. It's ironic that as much as we needed to talk about our relationship, it would have never started if we had talked in the beginning. There is no way I would have made a pass at Nick if I hadn't convinced myself that he was gay. We talked until we were overwhelmed and then we made out to sooth ourselves until we were ready to talk again. It was worth it. We agreed that from now on we wouldn't make assumptions about each other.

"We need to get up and get ready for class, sleepyhead," I urge him.

He groans and squeezes me tight.

"No, can't we just stay in bed and..." He slips his hand to my already hard cock to demonstrate exactly what he thinks we should be doing.

"Shower," I reluctantly insist. "We can take care of things in the shower while we get ready. Multitasking."

He whines pitifully and pouts, "But I don't want to multitask. I want to stay in bed with you. Why don't we skip breakfast?"

"Because I'll faint by lunch if I don't eat something. And don't even say it," I respond to his sly smile. "That is _not_ breakfast. Much as I wish it was." I give him a lingering kiss before promising, "I'll take care of you in the shower. You love shower sex, so get out of bed."

Getting out of the shower is more difficult than getting in. We are both so horny that we come right away but neither of us wants to stop touching or kissing afterwards. I guess we're taking turns being the responsible one because Nick drags my reluctant ass out and dries me with a towel.

As we walk out of our dorm room, Nick takes my hand. I never realized until now that it bothered me that our relationship was secret. I'd thought that I was OK with it but now I realize that I wasn't. We walk into the dinning room, holding hands as a public couple for the first time and I'm happy. Truly happy. Of course, one sincere serenade and an evening of heart felt conversation isn't enough to change things. I still fear the future is limited with Nick. I still don't really believe he'd choose me over a normal life but my brother is right. You have to risk getting your heart broken. Being without Nick hurt so much that I'd rather take my chances on a hypothetical heart break in the future so that we can be together now. Nick loves me today and I'll take what I can get. No matter what fears I have, I'm going to stay with him until he pushes me away.

"You're not worried about this?" I ask holding up our clasped hands.

"The cat's out of the bag now. If your parents don't care, I don't see why anyone else is going to. I'm so sorry I insisted on keeping us secret. I was only being practical but I see now that it couldn't have helped your insecurities about me."

"It's OK, I didn't even know it bothered me. I thought I was OK with it."

"I was a little worried about how your parents would take it but I had a backup plan in case they freaked."

"Really? Spill!"

"I still have those pictures of boys doing body shots off of Maggie in the slutty nurse costume from Halloween. I figured drunk teenage daughter trumps son's roommate slash boyfriend on the freakout meter. Sometimes double standards are a good thing."

"Well, they didn't freakout so it's awesome to be us!"

"We should probably keep the PDA toned down in front of teachers or staff but as long as no one complains, we'll be fine," he assures me.

"Even if they make us move, they can't really keep us apart. We can just pull the roommate switch. No one even noticed when Trent and I traded places."

Nick snorts. "You know Trent isn't even Thad's roommate, don't you? Flint was supposed to room with Thad but he made Trent switch with him."

We sit down with our breakfast and Thad joins us at our table.

"Good morning, love birds," he says with a grin. I don't know what he's so happy about but, hey, at least I don't have to live with him anymore.

"Morning, Thad," we both respond then look at each with a smile. We are going to be so disgustingly couplely today, I can tell already.

"So, I can see everything is back to normal now," he says smugly as if he's responsible for that somehow.

"Better than ever," replies Nick. He isn't usually so chipper in the morning, especially without much sleep, so I take that as a compliment. I lean in and give him a kiss on the cheek. He turns and gives me just a flutter of a kiss on the lips.

"Hey, you two, enough of that. Some of us have to eat here and don't need a cute overload to start the day. Great performance yesterday, by the way, but Nick, don't get too cocky, that solo isn't yours."

"I know, I just borrowed it."

"You're choreography really sucked you know," I interject.

"Yeah, well maybe you can get started on fixing that today?" Thad asks me.

"Oh, I have so many ideas..."

_**09 March 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

**Dalton Academy**

"Not another emergency Warbler's meeting! Does Blaine actually know the meaning of the word emergency?" Nick complains on our way to the Warbler's meeting that Blaine has called. Again.

"Maybe he has a new crush. We've been banned from The Gap but there are dozens of retail stores at the mall that haven't seen us sing highly inappropriate sexually suggestive songs yet."

"At least Kurt and Blaine are on speaking terms again. On the other hand, Blaine seems to be as blind as ever about their relationship. What's it going to take for him to open his eyes?" Nick asks cluelessly. I can't let that one slide.

"I don't know, maybe two and half years of friendship and one accidental boner? I know, how about an erotic dream starring the Sassy Gay Friend?" Oh yes, he told me about that and I'll never let him forget that he needed the Sassy Gay Friend to nudge him into awareness of my gay hotness.

"Tease me like that and see how you like your severe case of lack-o-nookie," he threatens.

"What? You think you'll suffer any less than me?" I counter.

He stops to give me a sweet kiss before replying.

"You are so right. I would cave after just five minutes in your smoking hot presence. I would totally forget why I was mad at you after just one kiss."

"Five whole minutes? Damn, we're like an old married couple now."

We take our usual seats and wait for everyone to file in. Blaine is already up front just hopping with excitement. Kurt is sitting nearby with his look-how-many-fucks-I-give face. He's getting sassier the longer he is at Dalton. I think he was trying to blend in at first and impress Blaine but since their epic fight, he seems less inclined to work at winning Blaine's approval.

Wes calls the meeting to order and hands the floor over to Blaine.

"Warblers, we need to get sexified!" he starts excitedly.

"What exactly does that mean, Warbler Blaine?" asks a puzzled Wes.

"We need to toss our entire possible set list and pick something more exciting. I have it on good authority the judges are going to be grading on sex appeal."

Kurt rolls his eyes at that statement. I wonder what this good authority is.

Dave immediately objects with, "But we've already been practicing Bills!Bills!Bills! and Misery. We haven't even picked an anthem yet!"

** My chor. We can't dump Misery :(- J**

_**Sexified! ;) - N **_

"Thad, what is your opinion on this?" asks Wes solemnly.

** Gaveley wants to be sexified, Wes. Please let Gaveley join our sexy dancing! - N**

** Ha! Ha! - J**

I refuse to use LOL in texting. Because I'm not laughing out loud, am I?

"What do you want to sing, Blaine?" Thad asks.

** OMG, Thad. Just bend over already! - J**

** Don't make fun of poor love struck Thad. My creys ... :( - N**

** U didn't live with him! - J**

"Animal by Neon Trees," answers Blaine with a triumphant grin.

"And how exactly are we going to measure our new found sexiness, Junior Member Anderson?" asks a skeptical Wes. "Surely, just singing a suggestive song is not enough. We all know how well that works on an unreceptive audience," he digs.

The Warblers chuckle because we are never going to let Blaine live down the Warblers' Gap Attack no matter how much fun we had.

"Girls," suggest Dave.

"What? Are you mocking me?" exclaims Thad.

"I mean, we perform for girls. Specifically, Crawford Country Day. Let them decide if we are sexy enough," Dave explains.

_**11 March 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

**Crawford Country Day**

We stand patiently at the side of the gym as Blaine gives the girls a little warm up speech. We haven't had time to practice much and have only gone through the full song one time and never with the choreography. Blaine decided on the bleachers. Someone needs to talk to that boy about his need for height. The bubble machine? - that was Dave's idea. I have my doubts about how sexy an all boys choir running through bubbles really is.

Blaine gives us the cue and we run up the steps. Before long it's pretty obvious that we've a all decided to just chew up the scenery with our performance because we have no idea what we are doing. Kurt is taking the animal aspect of the song a bit literally complete with growls and claws. The rest of us go nuts with hip thrusts and attempted sexy faces. When Blaine and Kurt run up to activate the bubbles, several of the guys take off their blazers and toss them in attempted strip teases. Including my boyfriend. No, I'm not going to freak out again but his flirting with the girls doesn't go unnoticed. It's OK though, I know we are going home together. As we frolic in the bubbles, I can't help but think this is about the gayest thing the Warblers have ever done and that's saying a lot since we're an all boys choir known for singing Katy Perry.

The Dalton boys and the Crawford girls mingle a bit and I notice several girls giving Blaine their phone numbers. I guess they thought he was sexy. Not just him, I put my arm possessively around Nick when I see a girl batting her eyelashes and smiling at him.

"He's taken," I clarify just in case she didn't get the hint.

"This is my boyfriend, Jeff," Nick tells her pointing to me. He gives me a peck on the cheek, and I appreciate the reassurance though it isn't necessary.

"Aww, you guys are adorable," she coos. "Thanks for the performance, guys." She waves and runs after her classmates.

"I saw you flirting with the girls," I half tease him.

"I was just following our get sexy instructions," he insists. "And now I want to get sexy with you." Nick puts his hands around my neck and pulls me down for a more serious kiss before whispering, "Let's go back to our room now."

-o-o-

"What do you want?" I murmur as I kiss his neck. Our clothes are strewn across the floor in the trail to the bed. Nick is naked beneath me which is just where I like him. He runs his hands along my back and moans with pleasure as I move down his chest. "Shall I blow you? Is that what you want?" I ask.

"No," he answers simply.

"Hum, then what? _Froting_?" I tease, dragging the word out to emphasize how silly I find it. Nick actually found a fancy French way of saying humping as if that made it more romantic. He loves doing it and saying it so I like teasing him.

"No," he says again, surprising me because that's his favorite.

"Tell me what you want," I beg him as I kiss his face.

"You. I want you," he pauses and bites his lip as I look at him, trying to figure out where he's going with this. "I want you...inside me. I'm ready to try it if you want it."

Do I want it? Oh god yes, I really do.

"Are you sure? You don't have to just to please me. I thought we agreed that we weren't going to try anything new yet."

"That was twelve days ago. This is now. I want to try it. You said it wouldn't hurt so..."

"I said it isn't _supposed_ to hurt which means you'll have to tell me how your feeling. I'll stop if it doesn't feel good for you. I promise. Are you sure you wouldn't rather top first? I don't mind if you do. In fact, I'm looking forward to that."

"No way; you have to go first. I'd rather have your example before I do that to you. I don't want to mess it up."

"It's not like I really know what I'm doing any more than you do."

"I trust you."

"No pressure. Thanks." We kiss for a while before I finally say, "There are four things you need to know about anal sex."

"Just four?" he smirks.

"Lube," I say holding up one finger. "Lube, lube, and..." I continue, holding up two and three.

"Lube?" he guesses.

"Relax," I say. "Just relax is the other thing."

"So, it's really just two things," he teases.

"No, I'm pretty sure it's three quarters lube and one quarter relaxing," I insist.

"How am I supposed to relax?" he asks seriously.

"I have some ideas," I promise as I search the drawer for the lube. I find it and set it beside him on the bed.

"Oh god, we're really doing this," he says looking a little pale and visibly frightened at the thought.

I lie beside him and kiss him tenderly. "No, not if you aren't ready. I don't need it."

"I'm not going to be any more ready. I want to. I really do, Jeff. I don't know if I'll manage the relaxing part of the equation but you might as well start on the lube part."

"No," I insist. "We'll start with the relaxing then we'll see about the rest."

We lie side by side kissing, tangled together until Nick's tension eases a little. I suck on his neck, then trail kisses along his collar bone, slide my lips over his abs, plant wet kisses on his hip bone, and finally settle between his legs. I tease him a little by kissing along his inner thigh before I take his cock in my mouth. I work him over until he is lost and moaning as he tangles his fingers in my hair.

I pop the cap off the bottle of lube and slick my finger as I continuing licking along Nick's length. I swallow him down and suck hard to distract him as I rub his hole with my slick finger.

"Jeff, oh god, Jeff, that feels so good, you're so talented. Hot."

I slip my finger in while he's distracted and look up at him to see his reaction. He makes a surprised sound.

"How does it feel?" I ask before returning to mouthing the head of his cock.

"Like your finger in my ass," Nick answers sounding a little surprised.

"Not in a bad way though?"

"Not good or bad. Just there. It's kind of weird too but not bad."

I slip a second finger in.

"Still OK?"

"Yeah, now it feels like two fingers in my ass. This is going to be much easier than I thought. I mean, it feels super weird but nothing bad."

I scissor my fingers slowly, fascinated by the sight of my fingers buried in Nick's ass. The way his flesh clings to them and swallows them up is strangely erotic.

"Still OK?" I ask nervously.

"You don't have to keep asking that. I'll let you know if something bothers me. It's a little embarrassing having you stare at my asshole like that but nothing I can't handle."

I get an idea looking at the gap between my fingers as I stretch him. I take the bottle of lube, line up the spout, and squirt.

"Whoa, that's cold and seriously the weirdest thing I've ever felt. Did you just squirt lube up my ass?"

"Lube is the most important thing. I thought it was a pretty clever idea myself," I answer smugly.

I've read up on this but really I'm just winging it. The advice is to use lots of lube then when you think you've used too much, double it. But actually doing it is so much different than reading. The porn movies skip this part completely so I'm mostly improvising.

I slide my fingers in and out of his very slick hole and take Nick's cock back in my mouth as I crook my fingers trying to find his prostrate.

"Oh god if you keep doing that I'm going to come...you should go ahead and fuck me now...umm...that feels way too good...maybe...oh! Oh fuck."

Found it. Nick makes a feeble attempt to get me to stop then he's making incoherent noises while fisting his hands in the sheets. He makes a keening sound as his salty cum fills my mouth. I keep stroking his prostate as he shutters and moans for what seems like forever. When he finally stills, I remove my fingers, and crawl up to him pulling him close. He's pliant and boneless. I kiss him softly before asking needlessly, "So are you more relaxed now?"

"Um," he says as he snuggles into me.

"So," I say feeling a little awkward now, "we could just stop with that or...since you're all lubed up and all...we could..."

"Yeah, OK. I still want to. How? On my stomach? Hands and knees?"

"Actually, I was picturing something a little different." I arrange some pillows so I can sit up at the head of the bed and tug him into my lap. "This way, you're in control. You can go a slow as you need to. OK?"

He slowly lowers himself on to me and I gasp as I dig my fingers into his hips, trying to regain my composure.

"Oh god, you feel so good. So tight and hot and just wow," I babble as he inches down at an excruciating pace. "Tell me how you feel," I beg.

He settles himself completely against me; our chests are flush, his arms wrapped tightly around me, his face buried into my neck, and he sighs contentedly and answers, "Close. I feel so close to you. It's so intimate. And good. It feels really good." He squeezes me and nuzzles my neck with another contented sigh. I try to ignore the urge to thrust up into him but it's difficult with his hot, tight heat surrounding me. I want to push him down and plow into him but I manage to stay still and run my hands along his body instead.

I rest my hands on his ass and ask, "Are you going to move any time soon? Because I'm not really in the mood to snuggle just yet."

He chuckles, "It's your own fault for blowing me. You know how I get after I come. I _am_ in the mood to snuggle. And snuggling with your dick in my ass is the best thing ever. I really like it," he adds with a smirk. Then he lifts himself up, almost pulling himself off of me before lowering back down slowly. His mouth is on mine, his hands all over me but I'm lost in the sensation of tortuous drag on my cock as he stretches around me over and over. The pace is slow and sweet. I don't know how long I resist but eventually I'm thrusting up to meet him each time.

"This feels really good," he pants between kisses. "There are nerves that I never knew I had. I really like this."

I have no idea how long we do this because I can't do anything but feel. He falls back and I follow him in a move we couldn't have planned if we tried. Somehow he is beneath me with his legs wrapped around me. I feel his cock hardening against my stomach and I move deep into him. Nick is meeting my every thrust, trying to pull me even deeper.

"Yes, oh god that's the spot... Yes, Jeff... I love you so much... I love having you inside me. There. There. Oh god, _there_," he babbles. "Come inside me. Please. Please," he begs. I can't even form words but the sound of his begging is too much. I can't hold back any longer. I plunge into him just a few more times before coming completely undone.

Lying on top of Nick, I try to stay in him as long as I can but, eventually, he lowers his legs and I'm out. He whines at the loss so I roll off of him and slip three fingers into his gaping slick hole. He's slick with my cum and so eager to be filled that my cock twitches already. He hooks his leg over my hip and fucks himself on my fingers moaning wantonly, his hard cock pushing against me.

"Sorry," I mumble. "I should be taking care of you."

"It's OK. I didn't even think I had it in me after that spectacular blow-job but apparently, I'm a cock slut now and I love having you're dick buried deep in my ass so much that I'm ready for another round. Just don't stop doing what you're doing because it feels awesome."

He's filled with my cum and it squishes out a little with each thrust of my hand and that's a kink that apparently I never knew I had because it is just too hot. Nick is whining and thrusting on me with so much abandon that I'm half hard again in record time. Nick takes my half hard dick in his hand, stroking with the same rhythm that he is using thrusting against me.

"Jeff, if there is ever a time to use your super power, now is that time. Come on, I need you back in me."

"Being oversexed isn't a superpower," I insist.

"It is now because I'm going to die if you don't fuck me into the mattress. I swear, I need to come with your dick in me or I'm going to die."

The second time is much more hurried and frantic than the first time was. I break my promise that I'll be gentle as I comply and fuck Nick into the mattress. But he's just as desperate for it as I am, begging for it as he scratches my back and pushes up to meet every thrust.

We lie exhausted, spent, and filthy in each others arms. Our chests and stomachs must be stuck together by now with drying cum. I don't care though.

"We should go get cleaned up," Nick suggests.

I pull him tighter, and protest, "No, I don't want to move. I can't move."

We fall asleep instead of getting up to shower.


	13. Chapter 13

_**Title: Straight from the Heart**_

_**Category: TV Shows, Glee**_

_**Author: PerkyTxGirl**_

_**Rating: NC-17 **_

_**Pairing: Jeff/Nick; Blaine/Kurt**_

_**Genre: Romance/Humor**_

_**Chapter Word Count: 2800+**_

_**Summary: Jeff and Nick have been best friends since their freshman year. Can they become more than that?**_

_**Spoilers: Entire season 2 from the Warblers perspective**_

_**Warnings: Explicit sexual situations. For mature audiences only. **_

_**Chapter 13**_

_**12 March 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

_**Dalton Academy**_

I wake up and realize that my boyfriend is humping my ass in his sleep. That's not actually an unusual occurrence; Jeff often wakes me up like this. Not deliberately - despite the fact that we usually have sex twice a day, Jeff apparently still has erotic dreams about me. I would be flattered but I think it has more to do with Jeff's over active sex drive than my own sexiness. So it isn't unusual but it is only four in the morning so I'd rather go back to sleep.

I rather go back to sleep with Jeff inside me, I realize. It isn't a sexual thing, not really. I'm not sure I understand it myself but I like how it makes me feel close to him and sleeping like that...yeah, suddenly I'm desperate for it. It seems doubtful that Jeff is going to sleep through this but I manage to get him lined up and he dutifully thrusts right into me all in one movement. Unfortunately, that hurts like a bitch. It didn't hurt last night but I guess I should have realized that I wouldn't be as ready now. It doesn't matter. I curl up against Jeff and he instinctively curls around me and makes a contented noise in his sleep. He doesn't wake up or try anything more so I drift back to sleep with my boyfriend _inside me._ My last thought is that this should seem weird but it doesn't.

It's several hours later when I feel him moving in me and a sleepy, sexy desire starts building as I wake up to Jeff's voice.

"Nick are you awake? Oh god, I'm sorry, I must have in my sleep..."

He starts to pull away from me so I stop him saying, "No, don't stop. Don't stop. Just keep going. Please."

He moans in response as he starts moving again. I guide his hand to my needy cock. Just as my climax hits me, I feel him come inside me and it's just as amazing as it was last night. I don't think I'm going to get used to how fantastic that feels.

I pull away so that I can turn around to face him and I hiss a little from the pain.

"I'm sorry, baby. Did I hurt you?"

"No, I think I'm just a little sore now." I kiss him and then snuggle into his warmth. "We need to shower like immediately. I don't know about you but I'm filthy from a sex crazed rampage with my boyfriend."

"I can't believe you want to get up this early on a Saturday," Jeff objects.

"We don't have to stay up. We can get cleaned up, change the sheets, and come back to a nice clean bed and snuggle the morning away. Maybe even go back to sleep."

We do all of that, including falling asleep again for a few more hours.

-o-o-

I sit with my back to Jeff's chest, his legs on either side of me, looking through the possible movies. It's Saturday so unless the choices are abysmal, we usually go to something in the theaters. If we can't find anything, we go to the mall or just hang out playing video games. Of course, some days Jeff has basketball or soccer but not this weekend.

"Battle Los Angeles," he says excitedly. "We need to see that."

"Yeah, the reviews are pretty bad already but you're right. We have to," I agree. "But look, I want to see Black Death - Chris Smith is directing. I think it's going to be well worth seeing."

"What's it about?"

"Oh, never mind. It isn't playing in Ohio. Why do we live in Ohio?" I complain.

"I live in Ohio because my parents do. I still don't know why you're here."

"Yeah, not that Vermont would be much better. Rural doesn't even begin to cover it."

"So where would you live if you could live anywhere?" Jeff asks.

"Here with you, silly," I tease. "Where else?"

"No. I mean after high school."

"Depends on the university I can get into. I've narrowed it down to the best fine art departments that I think I can manage."

"I know all that, Nick," Jeff admonishes me. Of course he does, I talk about it plenty. "I mean, never mind school or practical stuff like money. Where would you want to live?"

"Oh, we're playing that game, are we? OK. Hawaii," I say decisively.

"Why Hawaii?"

"Duh, no winter. Beautiful scenery. The ocean, the weather, beaches...Everything is perfect there. It's paradise. You're turn."

"Wherever you are. So Hawaii," he says smugly.

"Oh, that's cheating."

"How's that cheating?" he says as he starts kissing my neck.

"I gave you a thoughtful answer and you used it to get all smoopy. Which, by the way, I already did the first time you asked, so you are a super duper cheater pants," I tease.

We laugh and make out for a little while then go see Battle Los Angeles.

_**14 March 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

_**Dalton Academy**_

Regionals is coming up fast and we haven't even determined our set list yet. Of course we have several possibilities that we've been rehearsing. This afternoon, I'll be taping our performance of Misery which we've been working on for some time. Jeff is very excited about the choreography which is our most ambitious yet.

We sit with the Warblers chatting at lunch about the possibilities.

"Misery is going to be our best yet," insists Jeff. "Just wait until we get the full performance on tape and you'll see. You can't be seriously considering going with Animal, we've barely practiced it. And I don't think we were that sexy."

"That requirement was completely bogus," smirks Kurt with a glare at Blaine.

"What do you mean?" asks Wes. "The judges aren't going to be looking for a sexier performance?"

"Turns out that our source on that topic was completely unreliable," affirms Kurt. "I got the straight scoop from my brother this weekend."

"Can you trust him? Isn't he on New Directions?" points out Dave.

"Please, Finn doesn't have the brain power to pull off a false information double cross. It was a simple misunderstanding. The Warblers do not need to get sexified," he insists using air quotes around the word.

The Warblers absorb this information with relief. After all, in addition to our opening number we need to pick and rehearse an anthem.

-o-o-

I sit next to Kurt pretending to study and ignoring the camera. Not only is this the most ambitious choreography we are about to do but the most ambitious shoot as well. I've got four cameras covering the action. Blaine bursts in the door on cue. I know, we used the flying papers and that entrance before in Bills!Bills!Bills! but we are on going to use one or the other so I don't feel bad repeating it.

Blaine's performance is, as always, spectacular. He doesn't have the best voice in the group but he makes up for it in charisma and shear stage presence. I can hardly keep my eyes off my boyfriend though. Jeff really upped the ante on the dancing in this number. When he leads a group of Warblers in table banging...yeah, that gets to me more than a little because he is just too sexy for words. I grin like an idiot at him as we sing the last notes. Thad claps Jeff on the back in congratulations.

Blaine, being Blaine, announces that this is our regionals opening number even though that hasn't been decided by the council yet. Jeff and I head to dinner with Jon and Aaron. I turn and look back at Blaine and Kurt for moment. Blaine looks at Kurt like an eager puppy hoping for a good boy. Their dynamic has really changed in the last few weeks. I wonder what's going on with that.

_**15 March 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

_**Dalton Academy**_

"This meeting of the Warblers will come to order," intones Wes with a bang of Gaveley. "Dave, please start with the first item on the agenda."

"The first item on the agenda is song selection. The council, after great deliberation, has decided that we're going to sing "Raise Your Glass." It's a perfect anthem for us and it's a good upbeat song that is sure to rouse the audience while we sing it."

The Warblers murmur their approval because it is a good choice. Blaine looks excited at the prospect. Yeah, there isn't even going to be a debate over who sings lead. It happened so gradually that maybe no one cares to bring it up now but Blaine has become our lead singer without any opposition. I look around and realize that Kurt isn't here which is unusual.

"Mr. Chairman, may I have the floor?" asks Blaine. I look across to Jeff and roll my eyes. Who knows what crazy thing he's up to now.

"Yes, Warbler Blaine, what do you want to discuss? We still need to decide on our opening number."

"Since we are doing Raise Your Glass - great choice by the way- Which is an anthem to...well letting our freak out...I'd like to bring up the idea of perhaps changing up our look as well since..."

The Warblers erupted in chaos requiring Wes to bring down Gaveley particularly hard and in rapid succession.

"We always perform in formal uniform so I can't imagine what Blaine is going on about. Is he going to suggest that we wear our informal sweater vests instead? That seems pretty rash!" objects Dave over the choas.

"Warblers, I am merely suggesting that instead of wearing blue ties with red piping, we wear jackets with red ties and blue piping for the competition."

The chaos returns and Wes has another round of Gaveley abuse as Trent shouts, "This is a kangaroo court!"

I try telling Blaine that maybe suggesting costume changes is not the best idea considering how hard it was just to get some actually dancing added to our routines. I barely start to form the words when the doors burst open and Kurt walks in. Not in uniform.

"Kurt what's wrong?" asks Blaine, the concern clear in his voice.

"It's Pavarotti," answers Kurt tearfully. "Pavarotti's dead. I suspect a stroke."

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry," says Blaine, expressing what we are all feeling.

"I know it's really stupid to be upset about a bird but he... he inspired me. With his optimism. And his love of song. He was my friend. Now, I know today we need to practice doo wopping behind Blaine while he sings every solo in the medley of Pink songs."

Ouch, Kurt's a little catty today despite losing his beloved pet. We're all sad. As Kurt said, he was just a bird but we were attached to him. He was one of the most active and cheerful of his line. Maybe that was partly Kurt's influence since he pampered and doted on the little guy.

"But I'd like to sing a song for Pavarotti today," Kurt finishes and hands Nelson a tape to play. Kurt starts singing Blackbird and we all harmonize to support him. He's voice is so beautiful and moving that we all forget our silly disputes about trivial things.

About half way through the song, I notice that Blaine has stopped singing and is just staring at Kurt as if he's never seen him before. He looks in love. I look at Jeff and wonder if that's what shows on my face when I stare at him. Jeff doesn't notice me looking at him because he's watching Kurt, who is crying, as he finishes the song.

"Thank you," sobs Kurt when we are done.

"No, thank you, Kurt," says Wes. "That was a beautiful tribute. The Warblers are grateful to have you among us, Kurt."

"Yes, Kurt," adds Thad. "Your voice has sent Pavarotti on his way in a fitting manner. He was lucky to have you in his short but full life." Thad looks over at Blaine and it's pretty clear he sees what Kurt, in his grief, doesn't. "Really lucky," he says softly.

"Due to this tragic loss of one our Warblers, we will postpone our discussion until our next meeting. Meeting adjourned," intones Wes with an uncharacteristically soft tap of Gaveley.

We file out of the room and as I look back, I see Kurt crying in Blaine's arms.

"It's sad but I think Pavarotti's death may have been the kick in the pants that Blaine needed," I point out to Jeff.

He looks back and answers, "Wow. Who knew that Blaine had a crying kink?"

I punch my boyfriend in the arm because he's being a dope. "Seriously? Don't you have a romantic bone in your body? Come on, clearly seeing Kurt so overwhelmed with emotion just broke the dam on his own feelings. They are in love and now Blaine knows it."

Jeff pulls me into his arms and whispers suggestively, "I'll show you my romantic bone."

I wriggle away from him and give him a mock glare. "You are such a guy!"

"You like that about me," he laughs.

"Yeah, I do," I admit taking his hand.

_**16 March 2011, Westerville, Ohio **_

_**Dalton Academy**_

"This meeting of the Warblers will come to order," intones Wes with a bang Gaveley. "Dave, please start with the first item on the agenda."

"The first item on the agenda is song selection. The opening number at Regionals is really important. It sets the tone for our set and serves as the first introduction to the judges. We're going to kill them with Raise Your Glass but we need to hook them first. Blaine has performed some stunning numbers this year for us to choose from. Teenage Dream, Bills!Bills!Bills!, Silly Love Songs, Do You think I'm Sexy, Animal, Misery...We have plenty to choose from."

"Don't forget When I Get You Alone," smirks Flint.

"We are not singing that at Regional," insists Wes. "No sexually suggestive songs."

"That leaves out Do You Think I'm Sexy and Animal, too," comments Dave.

"I think we should do Teenage Dream," suggests Thad. Wes bangs Gaveley for no apparently reason and Dave just rests his head on his hand in apparent surrender. "You know, I think Blaine's version of the song is actually better than the original," continues Thad as if Wes hadn't interrupted him.

"But it's not in his natural key," retorts Dave.

Kurt looks like he's about to take a nap. I agree with the sentiment. Why are we even here?

When Thad says to Blaine, "I agree. I think we should just let you pick the song that you want to sing" I give him a skeptical look because I had thought we were keeping up the pretense but apparently Thad is ready to admit the truth.

Blaine gives a rousing speech about not wanting the Warblers to be about him which might have been more effective if he weren't such an attention whore. But he wants to sing a duet with Kurt and the way he says it is so sweet and hopeful that we can't refuse him. Kurt does have a beautiful voice and surprisingly seems unwilling, at first, to just grasp the gift. Jeff is so excited that his hand shoots up before any one else's. He plays at being the skeptic but he's just as romantic as I am. No one in the room thinks this is about Regionals any more. Giving Blaine and Kurt this duet is our way of saying we're all glad that you've finally found each other.

When Thad says "Congratulations, Kurt," he looks a little sad but sincere too. I think maybe it's a relief for him to see Blaine find someone even if it isn't him.

Jeff and I walk down the hall together holding hands.

"I love you so much, you know that don't you?" I ask him because romance is in the air this week.

"Of course I do. You tell me every day."

"No seriously. I really do. I just want to be sure you realize it. This is real. We're real. And I'm happier now than in my whole life."

"I love you, too. And I'm starting to believe that we'll be happy for a long time."

_**Fade to black.**_


	14. Chapter 14

_**Epilogue **_

_**2031**_

"Fade to black? You've got to be kidding me. That can't be the end of the story!" my husband complains when he gets to the last line.

"It is. What do you think?" I ask Jeff apprehensibly.

"What about the first time you top? Or that time we..."

"It isn't about sex! That's not what the story is about."

"I don't know, there's an awful lot of sex. It's practically porn. And I'm positive that our first time wasn't anywhere near that romantic or awesome. It was more like awkward and weird. Like all teenagers."

"It's not about that. It isn't a biography. It's about finding true love. It's a romance, sweetie. It's supposed to be an epic tale about the meaning of love. And soul mates."

"Then why did you end there? We don't even find out what happened to Kurt and Blaine. What about poor Thad?"

I sigh. Sometimes my very sexy and handsome husband can be clueless when is comes to my artistic process.

"They're just minor characters. You don't need to know. The point is that you know the main characters are going to be happy together."

"But I want to know more. There are so many loose ends... And what happens when you come out to your parents? Do I get over my insecurities? And what about yours? What about our senior year? That was totally awesome. And college. We don't even find out who wins at Regionals! Our..."

I cut him off with a kiss because sometimes that's the only way to shut him up. OK, maybe he's right and I need to rewrite some of it to tie up some of the loose ends. Maybe...

"Dads! You know dads aren't supposed to kiss in public. That's so gross!"

Our thirteen year old daughter, Aria, is standing in the doorway of our study, hands on her hips.

"We're not in public and it isn't gross," I admonish her. "Kissing is a perfectly natural thing to do and all parents do it. You'll understand when you older."

She makes a noise that only a teenager can that some how conveys her exasperation at my ignorance and her inherent superiority at the same time.

She walks into the room with strong purpose and I wonder what trouble is coming. She tall for her age, blond and pale, like Jeff. She has a strong will and a sharp wit. At only thirteen, she is already a handful.

"She's lying!" exclaims a breathless Nikko as he runs in behind her. He's eleven, with sandy blond hair and a freckled face.

"Lying about what?" asks Jeff carefully.

The boy looks guiltily back and forth between his sister and us.

"Um...whatever she said?" he answers unsurely, realizing now that he doesn't know exactly what Aria said and therefore could be admitting to things he hasn't even been accused of yet.

"You know what?" I say as I put my arms around both children. "There is nothing going on between the two of you that can't be solved with ice cream. Come on." I ignore my husband's glare because, yeah, I spoil them but what are kids for if not for spoiling?

"Banana split! Can I get a banana split?" begs Aria.

"Hot fudge brownie sundae!" adds Nikko.

"Yes, to both. Just tell your sister that you're sorry and Aria tell your brother that you love him no matter what and we'll hit the road for some frozen treats."

The children hug each other enthusiastically, all crimes forgiven if not forgotten.

My husband pulls me close and says, "You are a great father and I love you, Nick. My soul mate, always."


End file.
